Assingning custody upon death

[Shel77]

What is the name of your state? Florida

My husband and I have yet to have a will drawn up, we would like to know if there is something we could do to insure that if something were to happen to us that my mother would get our son and that no other family members would be considered for custody by the courts. Is there a way to do that a document that states we want custody to go to my mom and that would be the end of it. Husbands parents would fight for custody but I can't live thinking that there was a possibility those nuts would ever raise my son.

 

[stealth2]

Your preferences would be taken under consideration, but you don't get to will kids like you would property. His parents would be as free to file for custody as yours would be - the court would decide the most appropriate placement.

 

[Shel77]

How should I legaly make my preferences known? I don't think my mom just telling the court we told her we want her to be our sons guardian would work. Also she is divorced but on good terms with my fater and husbands mom is married but not to my husbands dad. So, might that be a reason for the court to go with them because they are married? I don't think my mom could prove them to be unfit, we just think they are not capable of raising him and don't like their parenting style she did not even raise my husband his GP's did. Anyway, all of our belongings will be left to her for the use of our son. Home, cars, money everything. We need a will I guess. Thanks.

 

[stealth2]

You could state your preference of a guardian in a will. But it's not a slam dunk like who gets your car.

 

[Shel77]

So basicly I get to decide who can drive my car but I have no say as to whom We (his mother and father) want to raise are beloved son. That is sooooo stupid! I will look into this much further, thanks.

 

[BelizeBreeze]

So basicly I get to decide who can drive my car but I have no say as to whom We (his mother and father) want to raise are beloved son. That is sooooo stupid! I will look into this much further, thanks.

Of course it's stupid. HEll, it's your car and your child. So, since they are both property they should be treated the same right?

What a dufus!!!

 

[stealth2]

No, it really isn't stupid. Kids aren't puppies (or cars). If you give your car to someone and s/he wrecks it - oh well. There's a bit more at stake with a kid.

 

[Shel77]

The reason I said it was stupid is because I don't see how I can have control of who gets some worthess car or money or home. But the thing that is most important to me (my son) I have to allow some judge who knows nothing when it comes to my child decide who gets to raise him even If I say that I want my mother to, he could decide just because my MIL is married that is grounds for her to recieve him. When she has been an aweful mother to her three kids and I hate how she treats her grandkids and we very rarly allow her to even see or son. But when and if we pass away prior to heim being 18 she could go and fight and possibly win custody of my son. Thats what is sooo stupid, you dufus.

 

[Silverplum]

Here's what I think is stupid: having a kid with a man that you don't trust to be a father to that kid. For that matter, having a kid with a man whose family you hate and distrust.

 

[stealth2]

Here's what I think is stupid: having a kid with a man that you don't trust to be a father to that kid. For that matter, having a kid with a man whose family you hate and distrust.

Thank you for responding before I did, Plum. You were much more polite.

signed,
the anti-doofus.

 

[Shel77]

I am talking abou my husband and I passing away not just me we fly together alot and drive allot there is a chance that if something happened that it may very well take both our lives and thats what I am talking about if you will READ I said if something were to happen to US (both of us) not one of us. And you honestly can't think that I decided on my husband by wether I would like his parents (mom and step dad) to raise my child. I didn't say we hated them we just don't want them raising our son. BTW I also mentchioned that HD was raised by his GP's if they were not unable to raise our son upon us BOTH passing away because of them being to elderly I would be fine with that, I think they did a great job raising my husband.

 

[stealth2]

And again, with violins even - you can specify your preference, but a judge will make the final determination. Unless there's a compelling reason, your wishes will likely prevail.

And your flying situation is exactly why many people I know take different flights even when traveling to the same place at the same time.

 

[Silverplum]

Oh, we can all READ. No problem there.

 

[Let the DJ try]

Kate Bush
» Watching You Without Me

You can't hear me
You can't hear me
You can't hear what I'm saying
You can't hear what I'm saying to you.
You watch the clock
Move the slow hand
I should have been home
Hours ago - but I'm not here,
but I'm not here,
You can't hear me
You can't hear me
You can't feel me
Here in the room with you now,
You can't hear what I am saying,
You don't hear what I am saying do you.
Can't let you know
What's been happening
There's a ghost in our home
Just watching you without me
I'm not here, but I'm not here, but I'm not here.
You can't hear me, you can't hear what I'm saying
You didn't hear me come in
You won't hear me leaving.

 

[BelizeBreeze]

Shel, either accept that you can't do what you want WITHIN THE LAW, or don't. It's not my little bundle of poop we're talking about anyway so I don't care one way or another.
HELL, just make your will out so that you can decide who gets the brat when you both die. You won't be around anyway to find out it's not going to fly so what does it matter?

I swear, some people can't pull their heads out of their butts long enough to know which way is up...