Can employer tell me who I can/cannot socialize with?

[med88]

What is the name of your state? Iowa

I am working on a project for the state. I am a contractor - there are 9 contractors working on the project. I have developed a friendship with a couple of the other contractors and my boss and another "senior" member of my company told me to "cool it with the socializing with "X" and "Y". Can they legally do this?

Thanks,
Mary

 

[BelizeBreeze]

Yes
No
maybe
Now, would you like to come back here with some FACTS?

 

[med88]

I thought I gave you the facts.... I have developed a friendship with a couple of the other contractors. We have gone out after work a couple of times. At lunch, my supervisor and this other person told me to "cool it with the socializing"... what other facts do you need? All we do is go out on Friday night and unwind after a grueling week at work. And now I am afraid to even say "HI" to these people... and they are my friends!

 

[seniorjudge]

I thought I gave you the facts.... I have developed a friendship with a couple of the other contractors. We have gone out after work a couple of times. At lunch, my supervisor and this other person told me to "cool it with the socializing"... what other facts do you need? All we do is go out on Friday night and unwind after a grueling week at work. And now I am afraid to even say "HI" to these people... and they are my friends!

Ask your supervisor why he is saying this.

 

[cbg]

Agree with SJ. I can think of reasons why this would be appropriate and reasons why it would be inappropriate.

BTW, it IS legal. It may or may not be the best way of handling whatever the supervisor thinks he's handling, but it's not violating any laws.

 

[Venus05]

I agree with SR. Find out the reason why you are not to socialize after working hours with co-workers. I know if it were me, I would tell them to go pound sand as you have the right to choose who you want to have any type of friendship/relationship with. As long as these relations have no affect on your job performance, there should not be any qualms. Perhaps that is their concern. Ask.

 

[Beth3]

At lunch, my supervisor and this other person told me to "cool it with the socializing"... what other facts do you need? All we do is go out on Friday night and unwind after a grueling week at work.

How about whether your boss has a problem with the group of you being friendly at all, or whether the problem is the manner in which all of you unwind? Are you just having a friendly, quiet drink or two after work or are individuals getting drunk as skunks and dancing on the bar??? If the latter, then it very likely does reflect badly on the employer and/or is resulting in you and the others being a topic of conversation at work and not in a good way.

The topics discussed by the group may also be of concern. Is it a general "bitch session" about the company and your jobs?

med88, we can't tell whether the boss is being intrusive or whether he's appropriately and kindly trying to give you a "heads up" that you're engaging in some career-limiting behavior outside of work with this group. That's why Belize said you need to post back with some facts.