Cant believe I even have to ask this.

[maryjo]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? Florida

So, since my divorce my son and I have been living with my parents.

I have a more than full time job that is VERY demanding. My son was in private school up until this year and now he is public school because my plan was to move into my own place very soon.

Well, my car died and I HAD to get a new one. So, of course, that put me back a few steps.

Today, after an insanely stressful two weeks at work, I fell asleep for a second while driving home. I hit the curb and busted my tire and bent up the rim. I was alone in the car.

Since then my parents are now threatening to take my son away from me if I dont go, tomorrow, and get a blood test. They are convinced that I am so overweight that I am diabetic or something. They are also insisting that I sign up for some weight loss program through one of the hospitals here or they will take my son.

They said that if I dont do this by tomorrow that they will kick me out and they will not let me take my son with me.

Is this EVEN possible??

Yes, I am overweight. I have been my entire life. It doesnt stop me. I work 40-60 hours a week in a very physical, demanding job. I still take care of my son, although not in the way THEY think I should. I am still fully capable of everything I need to do. I am an adult. I think my OWN health is my OWN business.

I dont smoke, rarely drink, have never done a drug in my life. Heck, I havent even had sex in years!!!! I work and I come home. Thats all I do. I dont go out and party. I havent even had a boyfriend since my divorce. My son is healthy. He isnt fat and he isnt skinny. I dont fall asleep like this, EVER! This was a one time event. I think it was brought on by the fact that the last two weeks have been BEYOND stressful at work and we had licensing yesterday. After that I kind of just crashed mentally and emotionally as well as physically. But I had been through so much in the last two weeks!!

Can they really keep my son from me or take him away from me just because I am overweight or because I refuse to take myself to the doctor?!

 

[mommyof4]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? Florida

So, since my divorce my son and I have been living with my parents.

I have a more than full time job that is VERY demanding. My son was in private school up until this year and now he is public school because my plan was to move into my own place very soon.

Well, my car died and I HAD to get a new one. So, of course, that put me back a few steps.

Today, after an insanely stressful two weeks at work, I fell asleep for a second while driving home. I hit the curb and busted my tire and bent up the rim. I was alone in the car.

Since then my parents are now threatening to take my son away from me if I dont go, tomorrow, and get a blood test. They are convinced that I am so overweight that I am diabetic or something. They are also insisting that I sign up for some weight loss program through one of the hospitals here or they will take my son.

They said that if I dont do this by tomorrow that they will kick me out and they will not let me take my son with me.

Is this EVEN possible??

Yes, I am overweight. I have been my entire life. It doesnt stop me. I work 40-60 hours a week in a very physical, demanding job. I still take care of my son, although not in the way THEY think I should. I am still fully capable of everything I need to do. I am an adult. I think my OWN health is my OWN business.

I dont smoke, rarely drink, have never done a drug in my life. Heck, I havent even had sex in years!!!! I work and I come home. Thats all I do. I dont go out and party. I havent even had a boyfriend since my divorce. My son is healthy. He isnt fat and he isnt skinny. I dont fall asleep like this, EVER! This was a one time event. I think it was brought on by the fact that the last two weeks have been BEYOND stressful at work and we had licensing yesterday. After that I kind of just crashed mentally and emotionally as well as physically. But I had been through so much in the last two weeks!!

Can they really keep my son from me or take him away from me just because I am overweight or because I refuse to take myself to the doctor?!

No, they cannot.

(non-legal advice warning)

I urge you to figure out some way to get adequate rest. Yes, I understand that times get crazy, but how would you have felt if your son HAD been with you? What if you hit and injured or killed somebody? What if you had injured or killed yourself?

Be sure you take some time for you, even if that means shutting your door and listening to soothing sounds on an ipod (or whatever) for 30 minutes. Heck....go for a nice long walk (this bit of advice has nothing to do with whether or not you are overweight, btw). I LOVE to escape everything by just walking around my neighborhood.

Take care of yourself.

 

[Proserpina]

I'm almost as outraged as you are - but I do see their point.

But before we go any further, do you have any idea why you fell asleep? Had you taken anything (allergy meds etc)? Were you genuinely just very stressed and overtired?

Now back to your parents.

It's not your weight that seems to be their problem (and frankly it is not their problem anyway. Period). But they do have a point in being concerned about diabetes. Type II is much more prevalent if you're overweight and if you are diabetic (or eve pre-diabetic) you do need to get a thorough work up, you know?

Having said that it's not unusual for even an obese person to be perfectly fine in terms of blood work (glucose, liver function, cholesterol etc). Get yourself checked out, yes - for your own safety if nothing else. But don't be bullied either - until and unless they can show your health is a danger to your son they have NO business dictating their preferences regarding your health or worse, threatening you.

 

[Isis1]

bottom line, they take this to court, they lose.

dad has a better shot at getting custody then they do. but that's not the issue. your issue is non-legal. i would say "stuff it" to your parents, but i have an attitude problem to begin with.

but you do need to get some sleep. you got lucky. don't test fate.

 

[maryjo]

Thank you everyone! I was fairly certain I knew the answer but wanted to be sure.

I do realize I need to lose weight. And in fact, I HAD lost some, but ended up gaining it all back.

My goal for this year was to

A.) Get my own place

and

B.) Get gastric bypass.

And few other small things in there as well but those were the two biggies.

I hadnt taken anything though. I rarely take any kind of medication. Truthfully, yesterday was licensing and by the time I got home, I crashed. So then I couldnt sleep last night and was tired today. Plus, I am in PMS and some months I get so sleepy I cant stand it! I think it was just a combination of those things. I worked a 14 hour day last Saturday and then went shopping afterwards. Didnt get home until 2am. And I didnt fall asleep then! LOL! I spent all of April, May and June without almost any sleep at all and I never fell asleep driving. I think it was just the stress of the last two weeks, coupled with not having slept well last night and being in pms. I feel perfectly fine!

And I am VERY thankful no one was with me. That would have been horrible!!! Although I think, if someone had been, I probably wouldnt have fallen asleep.

Thanks again for the help. I really do appreciate it!

 

[wileybunch]

So it wouldn't be all that awful to get the blood tests your parents want you to get even though, yes, that is overbearing and whatnot. But, it will keep the peace and it's not a bad thing, you get a doctor checkup out of it. Do you really think they would try to kick you out and keep your child? Of course they can't do that, but I wouldn't want to live with the worry they would kick me out if I were you so keep the peace as much as you can and have a determined plan to get out on your own if you think your parents really would pull the plug at some time when you're not expecting it.

 

[maryjo]

You are right and I guess its a matter of principle. (And a slight matter of money at this moment. LOL!)

I think though, I am going to tell them about the gastric bypass. I was going to keep it a secret until after I had it done but if it keeps them off my back then all the better.

I do have insurance, but it really is mainly a matter of money right now.

 

[Proserpina]

You are right and I guess its a matter of principle. (And a slight matter of money at this moment. LOL!)

I think though, I am going to tell them about the gastric bypass. I was going to keep it a secret until after I had it done but if it keeps them off my back then all the better.

I do have insurance, but it really is mainly a matter of money right now.

Good luck - whatever you decide to do

 

[AkersTile]

Good Luck with all of it. As far as Gastric Bypass goes, you definitely should let your parents know about it. My Mother-In-Law is getting ready to have one and her Dr. told her she won't be able to do much for a few weeks and she will need people there to support her and help her through everything. Hopefully, your parents will support you as well.

 

[Isis1]

You are right and I guess its a matter of principle. (And a slight matter of money at this moment. LOL!)

I think though, I am going to tell them about the gastric bypass. I was going to keep it a secret until after I had it done but if it keeps them off my back then all the better.

I do have insurance, but it really is mainly a matter of money right now.

you know, i want to throw something at you. i use a Body Bugg. it counts the calories you burn in a day. you input the amount of calories you consume via a website. it's basic math. you need to burn more than you consume. some insurance companies would rather you use that alternative than surgery. you might want to look into it. and it's cheaper than surgery.

 

[Ohiogal]

you know, i want to throw something at you. i use a Body Bugg. it counts the calories you burn in a day. you input the amount of calories you consume via a website. it's basic math. you need to burn more than you consume. some insurance companies would rather you use that alternative than surgery. you might want to look into it. and it's cheaper than surgery.

And surgery works better than other things. Proven fact.

 

[maryjo]

It isnt like I havent tried everything. I have been big my entire life. I was born big! LOL! I remember being on a diet as early as 3rd grade. It isnt that I eat a lot. I dont. But my metabolism is almost non-exsistant. Which we found out when I was in the 6th or 7th grade.

I can lose weight but then after about 30-50 pounds I put it right back on and then some. I just cant keep it off.

It wasnt long ago that I considered gastric bypass the easy way out. My best friend had it done and he has lost about 120 pounds now since December and looks AMAZING! He had some major issues with it though and I was right there with him through all of it. Plus, he has been telling me all the things that most people dont talk about when it comes to the surgery. So I KNOW its not the easy way out. Besides that, I have a deathly fear of doctors, hospitals, etc. So this is definately not the easy way for me. Its is just becoming more and more my only option.

 

[stealth2]

But my metabolism is almost non-exsistant.

<snip>

I can lose weight but then after about 30-50 pounds I put it right back on and then some. I just cant keep it off.

How will the gastric bypass resolve this issue? Just curious.

 

[txmom512]

I have a good friend, and a good friend/neighbor who have both had gastric bypass. They both were very large and struggled their whole lives with their weight. It's really worked. The best thing is seeing how inspired they both became once the weight really started coming off and Staying off. They're both very healthy and active these days. It really did change both their lives.

OP - you ARE going to need the support of your parents. According to my neighbor, recovery was much rougher than she thought it was going to be... There are also possible complications you should be prepared for.

Good luck!

 

[Isis1]

And surgery works better than other things. Proven fact.

oh i defintely agree. i'm just the type of person that will avoid needles at all cost!