What is the name of your state? Virginia
Part 1
I have 3 kids. My oldest daughter is now 19, works fulltime (60 to 70 hours per week) Is one wonderful young lady. I also have a 15 y/o daughter. Also a onderful young lady. I also have a son who is 13. He is themain reason for my post. I will try to be brief and state the facts, also give enough onformation to help anyone out who may be able to help me.
My marriage of 16 years came to an end in 2000. We sparated in May that year, No adultry physical abuse etc. Emotional abuse was there, it was not severe was worsen with each passing day. I chose to ask for a separation, wnating to try to work through it in counseling.
I was paying the bills for 2 households and ensuring he had a 500 dollar credit card for food and gas for the month. After 6 months and more emotional abuse, then it turned to physical that September. He came by to drop off the kids. We had no custody or support orders at that time. I was watching a friends children for the evening. I was also a fostermom to 4 other children.
Ok, so he was upset at me because I had my firends 3 children. I frankly told him nice but firm, it really was not his concern. He began throwing things and started throwing things and even punched me in chest in front of all these children, 10 in all oldest was 16 youngest was year and a half. He would not leave and I did not want his children to see him hand-cuffed and drug out. My oldest girl called a friend. I did not press charges. I hired a divorce attorney the next day. Stopped all I was doing for him, and had him remove direct deposit. Not his book-keeper anymore.Gave up fosterkids, had to, my children and they also were suffering. Got outside job.
6 months later, he came in my home and threw a table at me, it was large, wood, heavy glass and iron. I busted my wrist warding it off, police were called. He was arrested and later found guilty. Got big fine, restotution payments and 30 days suspended. He was mad because my daughters would not go with him. He did not give any notice and they had seen little of him for nearly a year. Kept not showing up when he made arrangements to get kids for a visit.
Totally disagreeing to all terms for divorce child support and custody. 8 months later his live in gf filed harrassment charges against me. Judge told them to back off of me. Charges dismissed. I moved 2 hours away to protect me and kids.
My son has been in and out of hospitals for emotional and behavior issues. Dad still not a real part of their lives. Divorce final in Dec. 2002 child issues in March 2003. The last year with my son has been tough. I only had suspicions. Docs said not good enough, try it to see how it goes. I finally gave in Jan. 05
Custody did not change over until June, my request, in case it was not right.
2 weeks ago my son cut his arm with pocket knife six times, not to kill himself. Father was warned many times by me and doctors that called him to keep knives away from him. I found out after he was in hospital why. He was being abused by my ex and his wife. Severe punisments, beatings. Total improper care all together. Hospital called DSS and reported him. I was then asked to come in special one on one without dad or son there. This is when they told me of all abuse and DSS. Before dad could find out DSS was getting involved I drew up a ammendment to child support and custody, he signed, and I did also.
Part 1
I have 3 kids. My oldest daughter is now 19, works fulltime (60 to 70 hours per week) Is one wonderful young lady. I also have a 15 y/o daughter. Also a onderful young lady. I also have a son who is 13. He is themain reason for my post. I will try to be brief and state the facts, also give enough onformation to help anyone out who may be able to help me.
My marriage of 16 years came to an end in 2000. We sparated in May that year, No adultry physical abuse etc. Emotional abuse was there, it was not severe was worsen with each passing day. I chose to ask for a separation, wnating to try to work through it in counseling.
I was paying the bills for 2 households and ensuring he had a 500 dollar credit card for food and gas for the month. After 6 months and more emotional abuse, then it turned to physical that September. He came by to drop off the kids. We had no custody or support orders at that time. I was watching a friends children for the evening. I was also a fostermom to 4 other children.
Ok, so he was upset at me because I had my firends 3 children. I frankly told him nice but firm, it really was not his concern. He began throwing things and started throwing things and even punched me in chest in front of all these children, 10 in all oldest was 16 youngest was year and a half. He would not leave and I did not want his children to see him hand-cuffed and drug out. My oldest girl called a friend. I did not press charges. I hired a divorce attorney the next day. Stopped all I was doing for him, and had him remove direct deposit. Not his book-keeper anymore.Gave up fosterkids, had to, my children and they also were suffering. Got outside job.
6 months later, he came in my home and threw a table at me, it was large, wood, heavy glass and iron. I busted my wrist warding it off, police were called. He was arrested and later found guilty. Got big fine, restotution payments and 30 days suspended. He was mad because my daughters would not go with him. He did not give any notice and they had seen little of him for nearly a year. Kept not showing up when he made arrangements to get kids for a visit.
Totally disagreeing to all terms for divorce child support and custody. 8 months later his live in gf filed harrassment charges against me. Judge told them to back off of me. Charges dismissed. I moved 2 hours away to protect me and kids.
My son has been in and out of hospitals for emotional and behavior issues. Dad still not a real part of their lives. Divorce final in Dec. 2002 child issues in March 2003. The last year with my son has been tough. I only had suspicions. Docs said not good enough, try it to see how it goes. I finally gave in Jan. 05
Custody did not change over until June, my request, in case it was not right.
2 weeks ago my son cut his arm with pocket knife six times, not to kill himself. Father was warned many times by me and doctors that called him to keep knives away from him. I found out after he was in hospital why. He was being abused by my ex and his wife. Severe punisments, beatings. Total improper care all together. Hospital called DSS and reported him. I was then asked to come in special one on one without dad or son there. This is when they told me of all abuse and DSS. Before dad could find out DSS was getting involved I drew up a ammendment to child support and custody, he signed, and I did also.
