ex parte guardianship hearing - my rights as noncustodial parent?

[driver67373]

I reside in Arkansas. I will try to be succinct in providing a short history of this case to brings you up to speed. I am the father and noncustodial parent.
1. Mother becomes unfit (2009). I am in nursing school. Parents agree to pursue guardianship of my son, age 3 at the time, until I finish school. Parents do ex parte hearing and are awarded temporary guardianship.
2. Mid-2010 guardianship hearing in which parents are awarded permanent guardianship (so we think).
3. I finish nursing school in December 2012. Get good job, 2 bedroom apartment, my life is together, etc. I've kept close relationship with son and seen him regularly. Parents decide they want to raise him. I am not ok with this.
4. In April 2012 I hire attorney who files for extinguishment of guardianship.
5. Hearing in early September. Judge says we were operating under a temporary order this entire time. Mother showed up at hearing unexpectedly after not seeing her son since November 14, 2009 (her choice)
6. Judge tells my parent's attorney she has to the end of the week to show him order is not temporary or he resolves it. Custody by default goes to mother. Neither my parents or me want this to happen. I withdrew case in hopes mother would drop it too. She wants my parents to raise him but does not want me to, and will not fight for custody as long as he is with my parents. I sign guardianship papers with my parents. Mother says she will sign if I will.Then unkown to me they file emergency ex parte order at the end of the week to protect the mother from picking him up now that temporary guardianship is resolved.
7. I have basically fired my attorney. Partly because he filed things incorrectly. In addition to filing for extinguishment of guardianship he should have filed for custody against the mother. Also partly because he was on the front page of my state newspaper resigning from district judge because of alcohol problems and other misconduct that might get him disbared.We were never married and I have no legal rights to custody.

So I'm going to this hearing soon without representation. I want to know what my rights are and what I can ask for. I desperately want to raise my son, but don't want to take a chance on the mother wining a custody battle and raising him. It would be detrimental to him. She hasn't seen him in almost 3 years which is grounds for her parental rights being terminated in my state. We (me and my parents) have a lot of evidence that shows her unfit as well. Is there any way from this hearing that I can walk away with custody of my son? I at least want visitation but am hoping for more.

 

[OHRoadwarrior]

Based on your assertions so far, you have grounds for nothing. Have you been legally proven to be the childs father?

 

[driver67373]

Based on your assertions so far, you have grounds for nothing. Have you been legally proven to be the childs father?

Yes, DNA test, court order of paternity and child support

 

[Ohiogal]

I reside in Arkansas. I will try to be succinct in providing a short history of this case to brings you up to speed. I am the father and noncustodial parent.
1. Mother becomes unfit (2009). I am in nursing school. Parents agree to pursue guardianship of my son, age 3 at the time, until I finish school. Parents do ex parte hearing and are awarded temporary guardianship.
2. Mid-2010 guardianship hearing in which parents are awarded permanent guardianship (so we think).
3. I finish nursing school in December 2012. Get good job, 2 bedroom apartment, my life is together, etc. I've kept close relationship with son and seen him regularly. Parents decide they want to raise him. I am not ok with this.
4. In April 2012 I hire attorney who files for extinguishment of guardianship.
5. Hearing in early September. Judge says we were operating under a temporary order this entire time. Mother showed up at hearing unexpectedly after not seeing her son since November 14, 2009 (her choice)
6. Judge tells my parent's attorney she has to the end of the week to show him order is not temporary or he resolves it. Custody by default goes to mother. Neither my parents or me want this to happen. I withdrew case in hopes mother would drop it too. She wants my parents to raise him but does not want me to, and will not fight for custody as long as he is with my parents. I sign guardianship papers with my parents. Mother says she will sign if I will.Then unkown to me they file emergency ex parte order at the end of the week to protect the mother from picking him up now that temporary guardianship is resolved.
7. I have basically fired my attorney. Partly because he filed things incorrectly. In addition to filing for extinguishment of guardianship he should have filed for custody against the mother. Also partly because he was on the front page of my state newspaper resigning from district judge because of alcohol problems and other misconduct that might get him disbared.We were never married and I have no legal rights to custody.

So I'm going to this hearing soon without representation. I want to know what my rights are and what I can ask for. I desperately want to raise my son, but don't want to take a chance on the mother wining a custody battle and raising him. It would be detrimental to him. She hasn't seen him in almost 3 years which is grounds for her parental rights being terminated in my state. We (me and my parents) have a lot of evidence that shows her unfit as well. Is there any way from this hearing that I can walk away with custody of my son? I at least want visitation but am hoping for more.

So you think that parenting is a "when you feel like it" type of activity? What do your parents have at this juncture? IN what court were you for the guardianship -- domestic, juvenile, probate?
You cannot have your ex's parental rights terminated. Why wasn't she around the child since 2009? Did she know where the child was located? There is ALWAYS gong to be a risk that mother could win a custody battle. Your definition of unfit is most likely NOT the state's definition of unfit.

 

[driver67373]

Abuse by her husband to my child, domestic abuse, medical neglect of my child, etc etc. She also has a history of severe mental illness and drug abuse. My parents and I have extensive documentation of that so it is not in question. She had visitation rights ever other weekend established in the 2009 temporary ruling. She came to see him once during that time so at the 2010 hearing, 9 months later, the judge removed her visitation rights leaving it to my parents. My parents never moved or changed numbers. They've always been in the same place. She never made an attempt to contact my son or see him. She now has 4 kids with her current husband, a 5th on the way, which she has stated on record she cannot care for and wants to give up. They live in abysmal conditions. She had to be removed from court last week because she became out of control and the judge said to note in the court record that she cannot be controlled. I could on ad nauseum. My parents reneged on our agreement to allow me to raise my son after I'm done with school and the main reason is that they are attached to him now. This has been very upsetting for me and them and I just wish they wouldn't fight me over my child.

 

[driver67373]

So you think that parenting is a "when you feel like it" type of activity? What do your parents have at this juncture? IN what court were you for the guardianship -- domestic, juvenile, probate?
You cannot have your ex's parental rights terminated. Why wasn't she around the child since 2009? Did she know where the child was located? There is ALWAYS gong to be a risk that mother could win a custody battle. Your definition of unfit is most likely NOT the state's definition of unfit.

I was there for all the hearings. They are probate hearings. I consented to the temporary guardianship because I was in school at the time. When you feel like it parenting? I've always been there for my son. He knows who I am and he loves me dearly. I see him often. I have a fantastic job now and a safe home.

 

[stealth2]

I know lots of single parents who juggle work, school AND raising their child(ren). Why do you believe it is in your child's interests to remove him from the only home he has known for 3 years (almost his entire life)?

 

[Ohiogal]

I was there for all the hearings. They are probate hearings. I consented to the temporary guardianship because I was in school at the time. When you feel like it parenting? I've always been there for my son. He knows who I am and he loves me dearly. I see him often. I have a fantastic job now and a safe home.

Probate court does NOT have jurisdiction over custody between parents. You would have to go to another court for those issues. If you have always been there for your son there is no reason you couldn't have fought for custody then rather than agreed to guardianship. And your proof on mom's unfitness -- no. None of that necessarily proves unfit at all. Parenting is not about money. It is about actually being a parent. Which you shifted to your parents.

 

[driver67373]

If abuse, neglect, drug abuse etc doesn't make one unfit then I don't lnow what does. I was in school at the time and did not have financial resources to take care of him or hire attorney. Now I do. I did not come here to be berated. I asked what my rights are, nothing more.

 

[stealth2]

If abuse, neglect, drug abuse etc doesn't make one unfit then I don't lnow what does. I was in school at the time and did not have financial resources to take care of him or hire attorney. Now I do. I did not come here to be berated. I asked what my rights are, nothing more.

I'd appreciate knowing why you feel it would be best to remove your child from the only home he has ever known? CORRECTION - The only home he has had for half his life.

 

[BL]

If abuse, neglect, drug abuse etc doesn't make one unfit then I don't lnow what does. I was in school at the time and did not have financial resources to take care of him or hire attorney. Now I do. I did not come here to be berated. I asked what my rights are, nothing more.

You have the right to hire a Family Law Attorney ( if you want to find out who's good ,hang around the Family Court Rooms and ask ) before the next hearing to be there with you .

 

[Ohiogal]

If abuse, neglect, drug abuse etc doesn't make one unfit then I don't lnow what does. I was in school at the time and did not have financial resources to take care of him or hire attorney. Now I do. I did not come here to be berated. I asked what my rights are, nothing more.

No one is berating you. Your attorney could NOT have filed in probate court to get custody from Mother. Nor, while probate court had an ongoing case, could he have filed in Family or Juvenile Court. That is not berating you. It apparently is a wasted effort at educating you. In addition, abuse, neglect and drug abuse does not necessarily make someone unfit. The law is full of information regarding what makes a parent unfit.

 

[Zigner]

Before we go on, let's summarize...

We have two parents who don't "feel" like parenting their child because it's simply inconvenient. We also have a set of grandparents who have stepped up to provide a stable home and stable guidance for a young child.

Have I got that right?

 

[driver67373]

Before we go on, let's summarize...

We have two parents who don't "feel" like parenting their child because it's simply inconvenient. We also have a set of grandparents who have stepped up to provide a stable home and stable guidance for a young child.

Have I got that right?

Nope, you've got it wrong. I have never stopped "feeling" like being a parent. I've always been there for my son. When the mother became unfit while I was in school, my parents and I discussed it and we decided they would get a lawyer and get guardianship so that I might continue and finish my studies. They wanted me to take my son after I was done with school. They have now changed their mind and want to keep him. So no, I have never stopped feeling like being a parent. Quite the contrary, I am trying to get custody of my son so that I may be a full-time parent and take responsibility of him. Had I known my parents would change their mind (I trusted them) I would have pursued custody myself at the time.

 

[driver67373]

No one is berating you. Your attorney could NOT have filed in probate court to get custody from Mother. Nor, while probate court had an ongoing case, could he have filed in Family or Juvenile Court. That is not berating you. It apparently is a wasted effort at educating you. In addition, abuse, neglect and drug abuse does not necessarily make someone unfit. The law is full of information regarding what makes a parent unfit.

Berating is what it felt like. Thank you for explaining the difference. I really do not understand why my attorney did things the way he did. I am not familiar with what makes a parent fit or unfit legally but she has not seen her child in almost 3 years, has not supported him at all, has not held down a job or stayed in one place for very long, etc. Whether fit or unfit it is obvious to the court it is not in the best interest of him to have custody with his mother.