Grandparents house caving in

[modad75]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? MO

When my children go to grandparents house that is caving in what can happen? Their trailer home is falling apart. THe floors are falling in all over the house. You literally have to stepover a hole in the floor to get into the kitchen. The whole house is covered in mold (the walls, ceilings and I can only imagine under the carpet). The walls are black and yellowish from the ciggeratte smoke. THey chain smoke and refuse to open windows. They will not fix the holes, clean the mold or anything. The children have gone there and stayed while visiting their mother and I do not want them in that environment. Is this considered neglect on the grandparents part? The parents part? Is it even neglect or anything at all?

 

[BL]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? MO

When my children go to grandparents house that is caving in what can happen? Their trailer home is falling apart. THe floors are falling in all over the house. You literally have to stepover a hole in the floor to get into the kitchen. The whole house is covered in mold (the walls, ceilings and I can only imagine under the carpet). The walls are black and yellowish from the ciggeratte smoke. THey chain smoke and refuse to open windows. They will not fix the holes, clean the mold or anything. The children have gone there and stayed while visiting their mother and I do not want them in that environment. Is this considered neglect on the grandparents part? The parents part? Is it even neglect or anything at all?

Not sue of your State ,but check and see if there is a CPS hotline toll free number to call. Ask the intake ( most screen to see if there's a valid report to initiate ) ,and ask if the children of the ages there are should be exposed to that environment .

If not , then seek a court order preventing it .

 

[Isis1]

Err...posting history.

 

[CJane]

Dude, seriously. I know your wife is a piece of work. Really.

But are you EVER going to NOT be trying to limit her visitation or get her in even more trouble than she manages to get herself in?

This is your children's MOTHER and FAMILY.

Unless/until the children are in IMMINENT DANGER of ACTUAL HARM, leave. It. Alone.

Being poor/living in a ramshackle trailer/smoking like a freight train is not neglect. It's practically a rite of passage in rural Missouri.

Is it IDEAL? Of course not. But it's not child neglect, and it's not something for DFS to deal with.

Just. Stop.

You spend all this time looking for ways to limit Mom's contact with the kids, looking for ways to move away. Looking for ways to make Mom's life harder -- and then you do NOTHING about ANY of it.

What happened when you thought Mom was MOLESTING your child?
What happened when you REPEATEDLY asked about Mom "vandalizing" your property"
What happened when you wanted to move out of state in 12/08?
What happened when you wanted to sell your house to move to a larger place that same month?
What happened in 9/09 when you wanted to move w/out proper notice?
What happened when Mom supposedly left the kids alone to "go buy smoke" and was drinking and playing WoW?
What happened when Mom was living with a man she wasn't married to and you got all moral highground on her?

Do you see what I'm getting at?

Just. Let. It. Go.

 

[Antigone*]

Dude, seriously. I know your wife is a piece of work. Really.

But are you EVER going to NOT be trying to limit her visitation or get her in even more trouble than she manages to get herself in?

This is your children's MOTHER and FAMILY.

Unless/until the children are in IMMINENT DANGER of ACTUAL HARM, leave. It. Alone.

Being poor/living in a ramshackle trailer/smoking like a freight train is not neglect. It's practically a rite of passage in rural Missouri.

Is it IDEAL? Of course not. But it's not child neglect, and it's not something for DFS to deal with.

Just. Stop.

You spend all this time looking for ways to limit Mom's contact with the kids, looking for ways to move away. Looking for ways to make Mom's life harder -- and then you do NOTHING about ANY of it.

What happened when you thought Mom was MOLESTING your child?
What happened when you REPEATEDLY asked about Mom "vandalizing" your property"
What happened when you wanted to move out of state in 12/08?
What happened when you wanted to sell your house to move to a larger place that same month?
What happened in 9/09 when you wanted to move w/out proper notice?
What happened when Mom supposedly left the kids alone to "go buy smoke" and was drinking and playing WoW?
What happened when Mom was living with a man she wasn't married to and you got all moral highground on her?

Do you see what I'm getting at?

Just. Let. It. Go.

Not quite CJane, do you think you can elaborate a little bit more.

Sorry, couldn't pass this one up. I think our OP needs to focus.

 

[BL]

A right of passage in Mo. ?

Ha ,funny .

What if kiido breaks a leg ?

On to the big show ?

 

[CJane]

A right of passage in Mo. ?

Ha ,funny .

What if kiido breaks a leg ?

On to the big show ?

Really?

What if?

What if kiddo breaks a leg falling down the stairs at Dad's house? Sledding with friends while under Dad's care?

What if NOTHING BAD EVER HAPPENS?

What if we all cease to exist tomorrow?

What ifs have no place in a court of law.

 

[LdiJ]

Really?

What if?

What if kiddo breaks a leg falling down the stairs at Dad's house? Sledding with friends while under Dad's care?

What if NOTHING BAD EVER HAPPENS?

What if we all cease to exist tomorrow?

What ifs have no place in a court of law.

I do know of one case where a dad lost custody of a child to a grandparent.

Dad allowed the four year old to ride standing up on the back of dad's motorcycle...without a helmet..holding onto dad's shoulders. and the 4 year old fell off and broke his leg...in front of all kinds of witnesses.

However, that was after all kinds of "what ifs"..that was after all kinds of evidence that dad was an idiot...so grandma got her "smoking gun".

 

[CJane]

I do know of one case where a dad lost custody of a child to a grandparent.

Dad allowed the four year old to ride standing up on the back of dad's motorcycle...without a helmet..holding onto dad's shoulders. and the 4 year old fell off and broke his leg...in front of all kinds of witnesses.

However, that was after all kinds of "what ifs"..that was after all kinds of evidence that dad was an idiot...so grandma got her "smoking gun".

Ok, fine.

But there's a WORLD of difference between THAT and what MIGHT be happening HERE.

 

[LdiJ]

Ok, fine.

But there's a WORLD of difference between THAT and what MIGHT be happening HERE.

Of course...just "saying".

 

[BL]

I just faily remember falling off a M/C in a field on my butt as a youngster.

Ya hoo....

My father was a scout in WW11 on a harley, what's your point ?

 

[BL]

Really?

What if?

What if kiddo breaks a leg falling down the stairs at Dad's house? Sledding with friends while under Dad's care?

What if NOTHING BAD EVER HAPPENS?

What if we all cease to exist tomorrow?

What ifs have no place in a court of law.

What If's aren't indicated here !!!

Really ,sometimes your replies are answered on the sauce .. FA should have a shakes head icon .

 

[modad75]

What happened when you thought Mom was MOLESTING your child?
What happened when you REPEATEDLY asked about Mom "vandalizing" your property"
What happened when you wanted to move out of state in 12/08?
What happened when you wanted to sell your house to move to a larger place that same month?
What happened in 9/09 when you wanted to move w/out proper notice?
What happened when Mom supposedly left the kids alone to "go buy smoke" and was drinking and playing WoW?
What happened when Mom was living with a man she wasn't married to and you got all moral highground on her?

Do you see what I'm getting at?

Just. Let. It. Go.

She currently has two DFS reports pending in Jeff City review at the Office of Child Advocacy for the abuse. She has a case worker and a therapist for PTSD treatment.

I moved to a larger house. She was notified.

I am waiting on a copy of a DFS report that someone reported for lack of supervision against mother, do not know details yet, I know it will not state the reporter but I will see what the lack of supervision consisted of.

Mom is now on probation. It is a violation for her to live with another felon, therefore her boyfriend whom is still married to his wife and as a felon, cannot be in her home, he moved back to his state, not sure if they broke up.

Any other questions I can answer?, since this thread is now you asking me questions.

 

[CJane]

I am waiting on a copy of a DFS report that someone reported for lack of supervision against mother, do not know details yet, I know it will not state the reporter but I will see what the lack of supervision consisted of.

What was the OUTCOME of that? My ex AND his wife made the same allegations against me. It's not the allegation that matters, but the outcome of the investigation. My guess? "Unfounded"

Mom is now on probation. It is a violation for her to live with another felon, therefore her boyfriend whom is still married to his wife and as a felon, cannot be in her home, he moved back to his state, not sure if they broke up.

So if he doesn't live there, his status is no longer relevant. Mom gets kudos for making a good decision regarding her probation status.

Any other questions I can answer?, since this thread is now you asking me questions.

Sorry. Won't happen again.

 

[txmom512]

I do know of one case where a dad lost custody of a child to a grandparent.

Dad allowed the four year old to ride standing up on the back of dad's motorcycle...without a helmet..holding onto dad's shoulders. and the 4 year old fell off and broke his leg...in front of all kinds of witnesses.

However, that was after all kinds of "what ifs"..that was after all kinds of evidence that dad was an idiot...so grandma got her "smoking gun".

Oh Ld, If I'm remembering right, I remember that grandma! Have you heard from her lately - like how they're doing?