<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by navywife_tx:
As i've seen MySonsMom say, everyone's situation is different so therefore, if he and the ex get along there is no reason for him to get all worked up b/c he didn't put the specific dates on the every other weekend phrase. I do understand that she could say he had his daughter last weekend when he didn't but just b/c you and your ex(Ukiah) couldn't get along doesn't mean the same will happen to him. It seems like you and your ex couldn't get along at all b/c the cops were briefed and the judge knew your names, that's pretty sad if you ask me. I'm not bashing you just saying that it's sad when custody arrangements work out like that. Hopefully his ex isn't going to jerk him around when it comes to seeing his daughter.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>
You know? I agree with you that not all situations are the same, but from what we've seen on the boards, they all are the same in the way that no one can get along and are trying to protect their best interest in seeing their children. It is always good to cover your @$$ (and parental rights and obligations). If you automatically assume the best of a divorce and custody issue, then you are caught with your pants down. I tried so long to get along with my X when my daughter was in my care. All he did was make our lives miserable. Then he statred to molest not only our daughter, but his oldest daughter as well (that's where he started). I was protecting my daughter as I should, because no one else was going to do it and I am her mother.
Now that my daughter is in the care of her father, he still pulls the same stunts and gets away with everyone of them! I can't protect my daughter when she is with him. I tried being the nice guy, and my daughter is the one who got screwed by the system that was designed to protect her!
Yes it is sad when the police know you by name as well as the judge! It is, it really is! But what else was I supposed to do? I did what they all said I should do. Call the police when there was an incident, I did. Then because I had proven that not only was there physical abuse but sexual abuse, I was ordered not to call the "authorities" so who suffered? MY DAUGHTER.
At one point satweewee states "we originally were going to court over visitation because she didnt want to give me any. But when she was subpoenaed she changed her mind and now is in a hurry to sign the agreement and start things." If his X has changed for good and will never try to interfere with his relationship with the child, then he need not worry. But nothing is constant, everything changes, why not protect that interest?
All I am saying to him is the fact that if she was trying to deny him in the past who says she won't try something in the future???? And giving suggestions as how to make it a solid custody/visitaion order so that his best interests and parental obligation are kept intact for the sake of the child.
I would have been screwed by my ex if we didn't think ahead as far as when my daughter started school.
It has taken me a long time to get thru to X that all I want is for my daughter to be safe and happy, and you know what? She isn't, never has been. She wants to come 'home' and says something EVERY weekend when I pick her up. It is a sad situation that her father can't see beyond the monthly check and realize that she isn't happy with him.
In my situation it has been hard on she and I, I'm still depressed at times. I hate seeing parents who really and honestly care for their children be manipulated by the X, and using the children as pawns in a game.
I know you are not 'bashing' me, but if some of these people don't look to the future and take an active interest in the children, the children are the ones who suffer. All these documents are like a business plan (sad to say), if you don't cover every detail someone loses. If issues are not specific, then someone loses. ultimately it is the child who loses in the end.