need advice regarding stepmother

[mommyto4]

What is the name of your state? Arizona

I will not be available this weekend and my exhusband will have our 10 and 8 year old sons. He informed me that he is being required to work this weekend 10 hr shifts (he is military) and since there is no court order he said to take the children with me. I told him that was not a problem I dont have an issue with his wife watching the kids while he is working so when he gets off he can still be with his boys.

Our question is since I am out of town and he will be unavailable to be reached while working is there something that she needs from us if something should happen to one of the kids? DS8 has medical issues so if he is needing to be taken to the hospital would she need a medical power of attorny?

Thanks!

 

[LdiJ]

What is the name of your state? Arizona

I will not be available this weekend and my exhusband will have our 10 and 8 year old sons. He informed me that he is being required to work this weekend 10 hr shifts (he is military) and since there is no court order he said to take the children with me. I told him that was not a problem I dont have an issue with his wife watching the kids while he is working so when he gets off he can still be with his boys.

Our question is since I am out of town and he will be unavailable to be reached while working is there something that she needs from us if something should happen to one of the kids? DS8 has medical issues so if he is needing to be taken to the hospital would she need a medical power of attorny?

Thanks!

Yes, that would be wise under the circumstances.

 

[mommyto4]

Thank you very much!

She was/is very worried about the whole thing and we wanted to make sure all bases are covered

 

[Punkyb830]

I don't think I would want to give any one any kind of power of attorney over my child. I would ask my doctor what she would have to have and go from there.

 

[mommyto4]

well when you trust a person I dont think that its really an issue and I think that my childrens stepmother is a lovely person and my exhusband and his wife & myself and my husband are friend and get along very well. So I dont see the problem in giving her a medical power of attorny if my sons are in need of medical care.

 

[tigger22472]

Although I agree as far as the situation goes as far as getting along I would too fall short of any POA. Will you be available by telephone? What I would do is this. Write a note, make sure she has medical cards and if there is an issue consent by you can be given over the phone. I would also if I were you and you have a good relationship call the doctors office and make sure that you put her name on things as far as being able to seek treatment and there shouldn't be an issue. Then of course there is the idea that if she and the children carry the same last name she may never even be asked...

My step-daughter's mother informed her doctors and dentists a long time ago that I may bring the child for appointments as well as get information. In fact, she did the same for her son whom is not my husband's child. There has never been an issue ever. If your relationship is like ours then everyone knows that step-mom will do and take whatever measures it takes to get ahold of the parents and if that isn't possible you trust her to make the right choice.

 

[mommyto4]

ill call the doctor regarding that sense and for part of the time I will not be available by phone. However I was thinking more along the lines of the er since DS8 has breathing problems.

 

[tigger22472]

ill call the doctor regarding that sense and for part of the time I will not be available by phone. However I was thinking more along the lines of the er since DS8 has breathing problems.

If it's a severe emergency, then what would need to be done would be done. Again understanding your relationship I just think that for the few days that it will be and for the short period of time you will be unavailable a POA is a little extreme. Like I said earlier... she may never even be asked and again, if she is and it really is a true emergency and you can't be reached the doctors would treat her. Also if she were to take her to a hospital to in which your daughters doctor practices at he would be aware of her problems and be available to consult.

 

[mommyto4]

very true and thank you! I didn't think about going about it that way. I will contact them today and see what they say. The stepmother has been with me to an appointment once before and met the doctor before so hopefully that will help as well!

Thank you very much!

 

[stealth2]

Most hospitals have a form that can be filled out and kept by them providing your consent that a third party is permitted to make medical decisions in the event of an emergency. I have one on file at both of our local hospitals for my parents to be allowed to do so should I be unavailable for any reason. Call the admissions department.

 

[bugsmom18]

While in college, I baby-sat for a child that had special needs. When I had him for an overnight, his parents typed up a form that I was given permission to seek medical care if needed but it had the dates listed for while the parents were gone. That way it was not a permanent POA type thing. Just a thought**************

 

[mommyto4]

I have contacted them regarding this and both the hospital and the doctor have forms that I can fill out for third party care in the event of an emergancy and the doctor says that the stepmom can bring the kids to appointments with consent!

Thanks guys!

 

[kimberlywrites]

very true and thank you! I didn't think about going about it that way. I will contact them today and see what they say. The stepmother has been with me to an appointment once before and met the doctor before so hopefully that will help as well!

Thank you very much!

Mommy to 4, you are a shining example of how to get along with everyone for the sake of the children. You GO girl.

 

[mommyto4]

well thank you! just because we divorced doesn't mean anything. At first he moved away (voluntary assign with the military) and was a real pain but last year he decided he was going to be a normal person and request a hardship and move back here. Ever since day one weve been friends, put the past behind us and just live for the kids. We have no court order regarding visitation and he had constant contact with the kids. He had my husband now are friends and my exs wife and I are friends. Shes a lovely lady and isnt able to have children of her own so I feel only blessed that she would take such wonderful care of my older two boys. My ex and his wife have also offered to have the younger two children ( from my current marriage) come over and be with the older boys when they want. granted the one is just a baby but its the thought that counts.

anyways sorry for rambling I just dont understand how some people no matter there problems use children as pawns

 

[BelizeBreeze]

anyways sorry for rambling I just dont understand how some people no matter there problems use children as pawns

Because, for most people, growing up is too frightening a prospect.