06-20-2006, 05:31 PM
sunnyday123
Junior Member
Join Date: Nov 2005
Posts: 12
our hearing was today and he actually showed up with a lawyer! we never would've guessed. He contested it and his lawyer tried to say he didn't know where we were.... BUT we always notifed domestic relations when we moved (twice since he had contact - and the furthest we ever moved was the next town over). He always had my parents address and phone number, since i moved back home when him and I split. Matter of fact he would communicate with my mom a lot since she did a lot of the running around, taking my son over and picking him up b/c i had a pfa against him at the time.
Non jury trial is scheduled for August. He hasn't seen my son in years.....but all of a sudden wants to? Now that he's out of diapers and more independent......
It's a shame, i never was one to screw the system - did everything by the book, even went out of my way to keep my son in his life for fear my son would hate me later on if i tried to keep him from his birth father.
The only good thing we got out of today was watching him be led away in handcuffs - had warrants for not paying support
there is no order for visitation. When I filed for the PFA back in 2002 the judge granted him every Sunday from 12 to 5. From that point on I documented every time he contacted us, we contacted him, times he stood our son up - which were a lot, verbally harrassed me, etc. I even have "good" stuff written, such as the few times he called to check on our son. He only contacted us up to 10 months after the pfa and that was it.
We do have a lawyer, and we didn't even go in front of the judge. Since he contested it our lawyers had to go in, not us. His lawyer said someting about not knowing where we were and I had a pfa, our lawyer said that had nothing to do wtih it. But still, since he contested the judge needs more detail.
We asked our lawyer what would happen if he tried for visitation, he said he'd file for some kind of order to bar any visitation until it's over.
My lawyer said in the meantime type up the contents of my notebook and we'll take it from there. He said my mom will most likely be a witness since she was a big part of this, in the beginning. I'm hoping a judge would believe all I've written down. I know it's he said/she said but I'm not a criminal. The notebook is very detailed and long. Typed, its 7 pages so far and I have about 5 months to go yet.
The birth father did just get arrested recently for a drug incident
I'm not sure about the Sunday visitation. We never did go through a custody hearing. That visiation was set by the PFA judge - b/c there was a child involved when I obtained the PFA. She asked if I knew of anyone who would be willing to take my son and pick him up from his fathers (birth father can't get a license because he always owes support). My mom did it and they actually worked out a deal where he could have him every other Saturday night as well - but he rarely wanted to keep him overnight. I read through my book last night and out of the 10 months of this going on he didn't have my son 7 Sunday's he was supposed to (either he never called or he wasnt' there when we called).
Other than that he never took me to court for visitation in the last 3 years. And after those ten months he just stopped calling altogether. Even though I moved out of my parents in the middle he still communicated with my mom, and then my mom would call me. I didn't give him my new house number becuase of the verbal abuse - but he did have my cell #.
