Quick Question

[SMURFEELAW]

What is the name of your state?AZ

My fiance just got joint legal with him as primary, as mom tested positive for meth in Court she only has supervised visitation EOW. The NCPs (mom) mother and brother were agreed by the parties to be the supervisors. Grandma and uncle (easier if I refer to them as to their relationship to the child) now are refusing to supervise (I guess mom blew up at them and wants them out of her life) This weekend is suppose to be visitation the order states that mom is not to be alone with the child. If the agreed upon supervisors are now refusing is that enough reason to not show up to the p/u dropp-off location tomorrow?

This is a one party state for receording should my fiance make sure he has the supervisors refusal on tape (in case mom takes him for contempt) anything else he can do to protect himself.

Mom also didn't show up yet (and Court is closed today) for the random U/A she was ordered to do on Tuesday of this week.

Last mom told child last night that she would see her in two days, how do we help the child get through that damage? Child is only 5 and only knows that mommy got in some trouble and needs lots of time to work it out, that is why she went from being at mommys for a week to 2 days every other week.

Any advice is appreciated.

 

[SMURFEELAW]

Anyone?

Okay then is what my fiance is planning to do---> not show a good idea as long as he has both supervisors on tape saying they won't do it?

As for the emotional issues, I do know why they aren't being answered but I was hoping someone would have been through it. What do you say to a 5 year old whose mom is constantly letting her down?

 

[BL]

First . Can you get a letter , preferably notarized bu the mom and uncle stating they will no longer supervise the visits ?

Check your family court for an Adviser, if they have one, to get some feedback.

If it's too close to visit time, show up. Possibly have a police officer there to witness and note the no show. If a police Dept. won't do it , have witnesses.
When they don't show, leave , and write down the date,time, etc. and what took place.

If you can remain in the car with the doors locked do so.

Tell the child mommy has a sickness and hopefully she will get better soon , and be able to see her again .

 

[tigger22472]

I do recommend definately either having grandma and uncle sign that they aren't supervising or taping them.. as you said, in case mom tries to file contempt. Do you have a lawyer? I would call him/her and ask if you have allow child to go with mom even if she brings someone else with her to supervise. Is it in the court order that grandma and uncle are to supervise? MOM could possibly file contempt on them if they are court ordered to supervise... and if they don't feel they can do it based on their relationship THEY need to modify the order as they don't feel they can fullfill their duty as ordered by the court.

 

[casa]

a 5 year old should be able to understand age-appropriate explanations like "Mommy is working on getting herself better" and support her through it, reinforcing Mommy does love her and everyone wants what is best for her and will be there to take care of her. Good Luck!

 

[SMURFEELAW]

I do recommend definately either having grandma and uncle sign that they aren't supervising or taping them.. as you said, in case mom tries to file contempt. Do you have a lawyer? I would call him/her and ask if you have allow child to go with mom even if she brings someone else with her to supervise. Is it in the court order that grandma and uncle are to supervise? MOM could possibly file contempt on them if they are court ordered to supervise... and if they don't feel they can do it based on their relationship THEY need to modify the order as they don't feel they can fullfill their duty as ordered by the court.

The order states that "(name of grandma) shall supervise all visitations and respondent is not to be left alone with (child name)"

So if supervisor says no then is it contempt against my fiance or supervisor? The judge was adament to work things out amongst themselves, uncle is never mentioned in the order but was verbally agreed to in grandmas absence due to work.

Thanks for the advice I'll try to get a letter

 

[tigger22472]

Technically grandma would be in contempt is she doesn't supervise the visits. Child should be available for pick up... however, have it documented that grandma didn't show and you did not release the child as the order says mom isn't to be alone with child. Now, mom might try showing up with a friend and threaten contempt against your husband saying that she's not alone with the child however, the courts would be in your husband's favor as he can say he doesn't know the friend(if in fact he doesn't)... or if he does know the person and doesn't agree with them being supervisor(however he should have a good reason ready to give the judge). Still I would get on record the grandma saying she's not going to supervise. Still show up at the designated change place (if there is one) or if it's at your home have the child ready just in case grandma shows up. Again, if mom's alone or with someone other then the designated supervisor in the court order the child would not need to be released. To ease these problems and make it easier for the child however...I suggest your husband contact mom about this letting her know that if her mother isn't going to supervise he's not going to release the child. The child may wonder why mommy is there but daddy isn't letting her leave with her. When your husband talks to mom make sure he records the conversation because she may say she's not planning to be at drop off point because of her mom not supervising, then show up there anyways and try to file contempt against husband for not showing up. The recorded conversation will back him up and it will no longer be a he said she said problem.

 

[SMURFEELAW]

Thanks for the advice. My fiance is calling mom tonight to tell her that grandma and uncle said no way they would supervise and that they won't be at the location. The only thing that stinks about having to be at the location is that it is 100 miles away and we have to p/u the child from school, leave right away and go through about 50 miles of hard core gridlock traffic on sundays it takes us an hour and 20 minutes on fridays it takes us almost 2 1/2 hours then to sit, wait and turn around that puts all of us (namely my concern is for the child) in the car for about 4 hours right after school for her and work for us for no reason.

No Lawyer and the court is closed so I couldn't get to the Court Advisor today. I will post tomorrow the outcome of the conversation with mom, grandma and uncle tonight and hopefully get through to the Court advisor tomorrow too.

Thanks tigger, blonde and casa for all the advice, i'll let you know.