Seperation Stress Help

[rmeglior]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? PA

Ok, so I know that everyone here has their own stressful situations pertaining to their divorce, I’m just hoping to get some insight on mine. I’ve currently been separated (living apart) from my spouse for almost a year now. She’s basically taking a very passive aggressive approach to our situation and doing everything in her power to procrastinate things. I’ve filed for divorce (non contested), but she’s ignored the paperwork. She’s forced my hand to sell the house and split the assets which I did willingly and as quickly as I could. She refuses to look at our 2010 taxes that I’ve prepared and she won’t transfer her vehicle into her name which is still on my credit. She is making payments on it, but I’m running into issues with a house I’m trying to get because of my debt to income. She has agreed to at least sign a spousal waiver on the new house, but of course I haven’t seen anything yet (nor would I move ahead without it).

I’m just not sure what I can do or should do. I’ve been very polite and civil throughout this process mainly for the kids (she has them). She’s a good mom, so I don’t want to do anything that would upset that situation. I’ve gone through therapy and my Dr defiantly said she is using a passive aggressive approach to dealing with this situation. My spouse on the other hand hasn’t taken the advice to talk to a professional.

Maybe I’m just venting, and I know a lot of people out there have it worse than I do. Any suggestions or insight? Thanks for reading and your time!

 

[LdiJ]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? PA

Ok, so I know that everyone here has their own stressful situations pertaining to their divorce, I’m just hoping to get some insight on mine. I’ve currently been separated (living apart) from my spouse for almost a year now. She’s basically taking a very passive aggressive approach to our situation and doing everything in her power to procrastinate things. I’ve filed for divorce (non contested), but she’s ignored the paperwork. She’s forced my hand to sell the house and split the assets which I did willingly and as quickly as I could.

If you sold the house willingly then how did she force your hand?

She refuses to look at our 2010 taxes that I’ve prepared

She is not required to file a joint return with you. In fact, based on the length of your separation and the fact that the children live with her, she is free to file a return by herself as head of household, and claim the children. You would have no recourse against that.

and she won’t transfer her vehicle into her name which is still on my credit. She is making payments on it, but I’m running into issues with a house I’m trying to get because of my debt to income. She has agreed to at least sign a spousal waiver on the new house, but of course I haven’t seen anything yet (nor would I move ahead without it).

She is not required to refinance the car unless a court orders her to do so. Its really a bad idea to buy a house until after a divorce is final.

I’m just not sure what I can do or should do. I’ve been very polite and civil throughout this process mainly for the kids (she has them). She’s a good mom, so I don’t want to do anything that would upset that situation. I’ve gone through therapy and my Dr defiantly said she is using a passive aggressive approach to dealing with this situation. My spouse on the other hand hasn’t taken the advice to talk to a professional.

I don't see anything passive/agressive about this at all and she certainly isn't required to get therapy just because you think she needs it.

Maybe I’m just venting, and I know a lot of people out there have it worse than I do. Any suggestions or insight? Thanks for reading and your time!

Follow through on your divorce filing and get everything settled in a divorce.

 

[stealth2]

What LDi said.

 

[rmeglior]

Thanks for your comments. I can't say they are excatly what I was looking for, but thanks none the less

 

[dlw99]

It's quite possible that Mom is being passive aggressive with you, but not necessarily from what you describe here.

I'm sure you've given your therapist a lot more information which led to his assertion.

How has Mom been with your visitation rights?

 

[rmeglior]

Thanks for the reply, yes there are a lot of back examples that I didn't want to get into here that lead to the passive aggressive conclusion. Fortunately, she has been great with the kids and I see them all the time. One of the reasons I want to get a place I can call home is so I can have more quality time with them...