Soon to be Ex-Wife Asking about alimony

[Silverplum]

guess I'm trying to figure out WHY you would pay alimony to someone who decides to up and quit a perfectly good job.
{snip}
BTW - I guarantee I wouldn't be finding a job until I had to since you're allowing me to be lazy!

I'm with ya, Ginny. WE should quit our jobs and get OP to support US!

 

[Golfball]

guess I'm trying to figure out WHY you would pay alimony to someone who decides to up and quit a perfectly good job.

Court orders protect both parties. You should have it entered into an order - and the terms.

BTW - I guarantee I wouldn't be finding a job until I had to since you're allowing me to be lazy!

Sometimes negotiating to pay a (small) amount of alimony can be cheaper than paying the attorney to say, "No alimony" and the resultant fees from the court fight.

Plus, one can also push for more favorable terms elsewhere if the alimony carrot is being dangled.

 

[vision3]

Sometimes negotiating to pay a (small) amount of alimony can be cheaper than paying the attorney to say, "No alimony" and the resultant fees from the court fight.

Plus, one can also push for more favorable terms elsewhere if the alimony carrot is being dangled.

Just what I was thinking.

 

[LdiJ]

Just what I was thinking.

Also, alimony is tax deductible to you and taxable income to her, so its not even a dollar for dollar exchange.

If your marginal tax rate as a single would be 25%, plus another 5% for state taxes...then 10k in alimony over say two years....would only actually cost you 7k. So, if it cost you more than 7k to fight it, then you would be coming out ahead paying the alimony.

I am not suggesting that you simply roll over and agree to pay alimony...because you are in a short term marriage. What I am suggesting is that you carefully weigh all of the economic factors and make sure that you don't spend more money fighting it than you would save.

 

[vision3]

Also, alimony is tax deductible to you and taxable income to her, so its not even a dollar for dollar exchange.

If your marginal tax rate as a single would be 25%, plus another 5% for state taxes...then 10k in alimony over say two years....would only actually cost you 7k. So, if it cost you more than 7k to fight it, then you would be coming out ahead paying the alimony.

I am not suggesting that you simply roll over and agree to pay alimony...because you are in a short term marriage. What I am suggesting is that you carefully weigh all of the economic factors and make sure that you don't spend more money fighting it than you would save.

Great advice, greatly appreciated, thank you.

 

[nextwife]

Depsite tax advantages of calling it alimony, I think you are better off NOT going down the alimony route at all. Don't get sucked into opening the door to alimony.

Offer to enter an agreement to continue to cover certain expenses until X date. Personally, I don't believe you should acknowledge anything that implies she should be or is getting alimony.

 

[tuffbrk]

Sometimes negotiating to pay a (small) amount of alimony can be cheaper than paying the attorney to say, "No alimony." Plus, one can also push for more favorable terms elsewhere if the alimony carrot is being dangled.

It's incredible to me that a court would even entertain alimony for a 3 yr marriage in which the "receiving" spouse quit their job - and I don't care if that job was a minimum wage job. What the heck did this person do to support themselves 3 short years ago? And if they lived with mom then and have moved back in with mom - oh well - those 3 years should've been spent advancing themselves. Utterly, utterly sickening.

I'm NJ as opposed to NY - all other marital assets are equally split regardless of any other considerations so there are no "carrots" available to us here. Even not receiving CS for 2 kids doesn't provide a buffer apparently. I guess maybe NY is different and allows for more negotiation...

 

[tuffbrk]

Depsite tax advantages of calling it alimony, I think you are better off NOT going down the alimony route at all. Don't get sucked into opening the door to alimony.

Offer to enter an agreement to continue to cover certain expenses until X date. Personally, I don't believe you should acknowledge anything that implies she should be or is getting alimony.

Yup! What she said...once you open the door, it may very well be difficult to close it. Suppose she is injured in a car accident before the temporary alimony ends - then she re-applies to make alimony permanent...the state would rather that you pay for her, than have state social services pay for her... The whole Lepis case clause nonsense allows people to go back on alimony for like - !

 

[LdiJ]

Depsite tax advantages of calling it alimony, I think you are better off NOT going down the alimony route at all. Don't get sucked into opening the door to alimony.

Offer to enter an agreement to continue to cover certain expenses until X date. Personally, I don't believe you should acknowledge anything that implies she should be or is getting alimony.

While I understand the point you are making, its still alimony either way, and the tax advantage of calling it alimony is not to be sneezed at.

 

[nextwife]

No, agreeing to temporarily pay a greater or full percentage of joint debt and mortgage/rental obligation IS NOT alimony. It is credit self preservation.

 

[Bali Hai]

Sometimes negotiating to pay a (small) amount of alimony can be cheaper than paying the attorney to say, "No alimony" and the resultant fees from the court fight.

Plus, one can also push for more favorable terms elsewhere if the alimony carrot is being dangled.

You are a freaking jackass to even suggest that.

 

[Bali Hai]

Also, alimony is tax deductible to you and taxable income to her, so its not even a dollar for dollar exchange.

If your marginal tax rate as a single would be 25%, plus another 5% for state taxes...then 10k in alimony over say two years....would only actually cost you 7k. So, if it cost you more than 7k to fight it, then you would be coming out ahead paying the alimony.

I am not suggesting that you simply roll over and agree to pay alimony...because you are in a short term marriage. What I am suggesting is that you carefully weigh all of the economic factors and make sure that you don't spend more money fighting it than you would save.[/QUOTE

I would fight paying this A-Hole B#$%^*&! before I gave her one dime of alimony!!

It was a three year freaking marriage for Christ sake!!

Peddle your "men owes women" on a different site!!

 

[LdiJ]

Also, alimony is tax deductible to you and taxable income to her, so its not even a dollar for dollar exchange.

If your marginal tax rate as a single would be 25%, plus another 5% for state taxes...then 10k in alimony over say two years....would only actually cost you 7k. So, if it cost you more than 7k to fight it, then you would be coming out ahead paying the alimony.

I am not suggesting that you simply roll over and agree to pay alimony...because you are in a short term marriage. What I am suggesting is that you carefully weigh all of the economic factors and make sure that you don't spend more money fighting it than you would save.[/QUOTE

I would fight paying this A-Hole B#$%^*&! before I gave her one dime of alimony!!

It was a three year freaking marriage for Christ sake!!

Peddle your "men owes women" on a different site!!

Stuff it Bali....

As an accountant I look at things from a different perspective than you do.

You would insist on fighting it even if it ending up costing you 10 times as much to fight it as it would to pay it. To me, that is simply economic stupidity.

I did not suggest that he simply roll over and pay alimony. I suggested that he carefully weigh all of the economic factors and then decide.

 

[Golfball]

You are a freaking jackass to even suggest that.

How so?

My attorney's estimates of how much it would cost to locally defend an alimony claim are double what I'm actually paying out. Since I'm not made of money, I'm picking which battles I fight, and which ones I can sidestep.

Incidentally, the amount I'm paying is *four* percent of what she actually asked for in court in her initial petition. I think I'm coming out ahead here.

 

[Bali Hai]

How so?

My attorney's estimates of how much it would cost to locally defend an alimony claim are double what I'm actually paying out. Since I'm not made of money, I'm picking which battles I fight, and which ones I can sidestep.

Incidentally, the amount I'm paying is *four* percent of what she actually asked for in court in her initial petition. I think I'm coming out ahead here.

The "system" has BRAINWASHED you!

The "system" makes you "THINK" you are coming out ahead!

But in fact the "system" with it's predisposition that men are supposed to pay women money upon divorce has scared you into paying out money that you should have never been required to pay to begin with!

People like you keep this "system" well norished!!