What is the name of your state? DE
My husband has recently gotten his daughter (she's been here less than 2 weeks). He was going to put in paperwork to request the change of custody, but biomom called out of the blue (hadn't called in 18 months) and said he needed to take her. My concern is that he just came off a 14 month deployment and may be sent out for up to a year in less than 2 months. He would like to expedite a petition for sole legal and physical custody. I'm concerned that when he leaves, biomom will decide sd needs to go back across the country as she did last year when she was sent to live with us.
To try to summarize why I believe she should stay:
- biomom lives a questionable lifestyle and didn't even live in the same city as her child
- the great-grandmother(gg) raised the child since dh wasn't in the state and biomom rarely saw/spoke to sd
- neither gg nor biomom can control sd's behavior at home or school
- sd acted out in school, suffered academically, had to witness biomom and gg cursing out and threatening family and teachers, was forbidden to speak to myself or daughter although her only siblings live with me
- gg petitioned for guardianship because of biomom in 2000 and 2003 but dropped it when I petitioned for visitation
I believe sd will shut down emotionally again and probably fail in school if she has to go back (I'm working with her teacher now to catch her up. I had conferences with her teachers and assistant principal regarding her school work and behavior.) I am wondering how to petition the court.
Does she automatically have the option to take sd back if dh is called away again? Is there any way to write into the agreement that should he deploy sd will stay in our home? Should we ask for the custody hearing to be the same day as the hearing for guardianship (I petitioned after gg, but the mail got delayed getting to my husband causing everything to be delayed.)? Should he ask for sole custody and then I request temporary guardianship at the same time (we have to drive cross-country to attend court)?
I'm just not sure which direction to go, especially since we have such a short time frame. I encourage the family to be involved, but I believe they would be willing to hurt sd emotionally and academically just to spite me. If she goes back, I know she'll be neglected again.
My husband has recently gotten his daughter (she's been here less than 2 weeks). He was going to put in paperwork to request the change of custody, but biomom called out of the blue (hadn't called in 18 months) and said he needed to take her. My concern is that he just came off a 14 month deployment and may be sent out for up to a year in less than 2 months. He would like to expedite a petition for sole legal and physical custody. I'm concerned that when he leaves, biomom will decide sd needs to go back across the country as she did last year when she was sent to live with us.
To try to summarize why I believe she should stay:
- biomom lives a questionable lifestyle and didn't even live in the same city as her child
- the great-grandmother(gg) raised the child since dh wasn't in the state and biomom rarely saw/spoke to sd
- neither gg nor biomom can control sd's behavior at home or school
- sd acted out in school, suffered academically, had to witness biomom and gg cursing out and threatening family and teachers, was forbidden to speak to myself or daughter although her only siblings live with me
- gg petitioned for guardianship because of biomom in 2000 and 2003 but dropped it when I petitioned for visitation
I believe sd will shut down emotionally again and probably fail in school if she has to go back (I'm working with her teacher now to catch her up. I had conferences with her teachers and assistant principal regarding her school work and behavior.) I am wondering how to petition the court.
Does she automatically have the option to take sd back if dh is called away again? Is there any way to write into the agreement that should he deploy sd will stay in our home? Should we ask for the custody hearing to be the same day as the hearing for guardianship (I petitioned after gg, but the mail got delayed getting to my husband causing everything to be delayed.)? Should he ask for sole custody and then I request temporary guardianship at the same time (we have to drive cross-country to attend court)?
I'm just not sure which direction to go, especially since we have such a short time frame. I encourage the family to be involved, but I believe they would be willing to hurt sd emotionally and academically just to spite me. If she goes back, I know she'll be neglected again.
