What should Child Support be spent on.

[confuseddad_tx]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? TX

Each month I send my ex wife $650 in child support. I have been doing so since July 2008. The child that I send the support for told my parents that she needs new clothes for school (starts on Aug 24). My parents asked her about the child support that I send. The child stated that her mother spends the child support for rent and groceries. Her mother has a job, so my question is, "Are groceries and rent what the child support is supposed to be spent on?" I was under the assumption that the child support was to be used for things the child needs (i.e clothes, items for school, etc). Also, is there a way (other than asking my ex) to get receipts for items the child support is being spent on?

 

[Concerned33]

nope. The CP can spend the child support on whatever he/she wants to. As long as the kids are fed, housed and clothed, you have no right to ask what it is being spent on or for an accounting of such.

 

[Nevergrowup]

Surely I didn't read that your parents discussed child support with the child? That can't be true, because that would be truly craptastic grandparenting.

You should be FURIOUS with your parents for talking to your child about an adult issue like that. That was plain STUPID.

 

[>Charlotte<]

Are groceries and rent what the child support is supposed to be spent on? I was under the assumption that the child support was to be used for things the child needs

Y'all should see the look on my face after reading this sentence.

 

[Zigner]

Y'all should see the look on my face after reading this sentence.

Agreed - I mean - how DARE the mother spend money on food and housing for the child. She should be ASHAMED. Appalling!

 

[xylene]

The poster sounds naive, and is.

BUT

It is also true that parents spend child support on themselves and neglect the child.

Poster - is your child being neglected?

 

[TheGeekess]

Y'all should see the look on my face after reading this sentence.

That reminds me..... time to write the cabana boy a check out of the received CS funds....

 

[CourtClerk]

"Are groceries and rent what the child support is supposed to be spent on?" I was under the assumption that the child support was to be used for things the child needs

You're absolutely right. What child needs food and housing??? Certainly, yours don't....

 

[CourtClerk]

I find this interesting. My kid is 13 years old. He only knows what child support is because he asked me once after a Take Your Kids to Work Day and that's pretty much all he heard while he sat with me in my courtroom.

He has no idea whether or not his father pays it, how often, how much it is, or what I do with it. He also has no idea how much money I make, don't think he really knows when my payday is or what I do with that money, either. Surely, it's not that hard to keep your children out of your financial affairs... is it?

 

[Ohiogal]

Y'all should see the look on my face after reading this sentence.

Children do NOT need groceries. Or a place to live. At. All. All children should be deprived of food. Yes OP, you are an idiot, and, if you didn't immediatley tell your parents they were morons, you are a jerk.

 

[Zigner]

All children should be deprived of food.

I tried that once
.
.
.
They ate my cat!

 

[txmom512]

He has no idea whether or not his father pays it, how often, how much it is, or what I do with it. He also has no idea how much money I make, don't think he really knows when my payday is or what I do with that money, either. Surely, it's not that hard to keep your children out of your financial affairs... is it?

Honestly, I don't know that not knowing is such a good thing.
I can tell you how it was in my family growing up - it's a perfect example.

I'm old enough to remember living paycheck to paycheck. I remember my parents sitting down trying to figure out what bills to pay, what priorities were, planning the budget, etc.

My brother & sister, on the other hand, had no clue. By the time they were older, my parents made a LOT more money.

Now, my brother & sister has NO clue how to manage their money. I make very little (working for the lovely state of Tx & raising a dd w/ no child support) and I sit down & plan it out - just like I remember my mom doing. My brother makes a TON of money, yet they are always broke and have more than once had to borrow money from my mom to pay bills because they've blown their money on other things

If kids learn by example, why is not a good idea to actually Give them an example to learn from when it comes to financial matters?

 

[blahbleebloo]

Well when I was growing up, my dad paid my mom child support for us, and if we ever went to her saying that we were hungry, she would always tell us that we needed to call our father and let him know how hungry we were so he would send a check. I remember thinking that mom was some kind of saint and dad was some jerk that didn't care that his kids were starving. Turns out Dad was sending the checks, and Mom was buying drugs.

In other words, don't talk about child support with the children. It just creates an angst that doesn't need to be there. Kids have their own normal kid worries without having to worry about adult things.

Sorry, I read these forums a lot, and since I used to be the kid in situations just like ones outlined in this forum, I just felt like adding that.

 

[Antigone*]

Hey, I know a mom and dad who used their child support on concert tickets . The nerve of them to do that

HIJACK TRIVIA TIME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

A Virtual high five to the person who can guess the name of the OP who was complaining about the CP and his wife using "her" child support money on concert tickets


Dog... I knew there would be another more appropriate thread for our game

 

[Ironwil]

Heated replies are usually not helpful

I've seen a lot of heated replies to this posting, and many of them were highly insulting. Regardless of how you interpret someone's question, being insulting rarely helps educating people.

To cap it under one lid, yes, she can spend the money on those items. Basically what you have in raising children, besides direct items they might need, are cost of living expenses. Even though the house/apartment/other she lives in is something to house her, it also provides housing for your children. The same is true of the food, and asking for an itemized list of who ate what isn't going to yield you any results, I can guarantee you.

Another thing that comes up is future children. This is both not fair and difficult to argue, but if your ex has more children, and incurs greater cost for living expenses, you can see a raise in your child support, depending on the state (probably). The cost of living has nothing directly to do with your children, but your children are still being housed by your ex, and so the trickle effect begins.

It is typically a very bad idea to involve the children in disputes of any kind, barring extreme necessity. Cases in which they have to testify in court are one of those exceptions. Many parents end up putting their kids in the middle of their disputes, probably due to feeling helpless in the face of the changes, court ruling, etc., but this is always a bad idea. Don't call your parents idiots like one of the replies stated, but you should mention to them that the kids don't really know that kind of thing and shouldn't be dragged into the fray.