Visitation restrictions

[BelizeBreeze]

There is only ONE issue here and that is, the bitch is in contempt of a court order and until she is put in her place, NO OTHER ACTION needs to be taken.

The issues of parentage can and SHOULD be worked out AFTER she stops thumbing her nose at the court and the order.

 

[Kalso]

Unbelievable.


She isn't going to try stop me from taking my girls, as long as I take them to an appropriate environment (like I'd take them elsewhere), which she thinks she has the right to inspect the place first to ensure. When I called her out on that, she said "I wouldn't make you bring them back here, but I'd ask you to find a new place."

She finds my apartment unsuitable because I'm going to have a roommate come next month. I agree on the same grounds as not introducing them to my new girlfriend, basically that no one new needs to be added to the mix right now. But that's a moral decision, not a legal one.

She says that her lawyer is telling her that it's reasonable because of her perception of my "lack of good judgement" concerning how quickly I moved everything, from separation til now. I will admit that I didn't do things in the best way possible, but that's not for this thread, nor these forums. I told her to go back to her lawyer and ask him if she had the right to restrict my visitation like that. I have a feeling she might have a different tune today if she does.

 

[GrowUp!]

Unbelievable.


She isn't going to try stop me from taking my girls, as long as I take them to an appropriate environment (like I'd take them elsewhere), which she thinks she has the right to inspect the place first to ensure.

When I called her out on that, she said "I wouldn't make you bring them back here, but I'd ask you to find a new place."

She finds my apartment unsuitable because I'm going to have a roommate come next month.

Tell her to go f-herself on all of the above and harder for each one thereafter.

She says that her lawyer is telling her that it's reasonable because of her perception of my "lack of good judgement" concerning how quickly I moved everything, from separation til now.

And tell her to tell her lawyer, verbatim: "you're a f---ing moron. I Can even kick your ass pro se." Have her ask her lawyer when a "lack of good judgment" became illegal or was a provision in the court order.

I told her to go back to her lawyer and ask him if she had the right to restrict my visitation like that. I have a feeling she might have a different tune today if she does.

And also have her ask her lawyer to cite appropriate case law, along with state AND federal statutes to support their claim. Expect silence. Or a heavy shoveling of BS.

 

[Ohiogal]

Unbelievable.


She isn't going to try stop me from taking my girls, as long as I take them to an appropriate environment (like I'd take them elsewhere), which she thinks she has the right to inspect the place first to ensure.

She has not such right.

When I called her out on that, she said "I wouldn't make you bring them back here, but I'd ask you to find a new place."


She can ask all she wants. You don't have to do a damn thing.

She finds my apartment unsuitable because I'm going to have a roommate come next month.

Tough. She can deal with it. Unless your roommate poses an immediate danger to the children's well-being she can't do anything about it -- in other words the roommate better not be a sex offender or something of that ilk.

I agree on the same grounds as not introducing them to my new girlfriend, basically that no one new needs to be added to the mix right now. But that's a moral decision, not a legal one.


That is something that doesn't matter in the courts. So what you are telling me is that these children will not meet anyone new at all between now and whatever magic day it is? Girlfriend is a bit different due to the kids having mom and dad and not needing other serious relationships like that -- but no friends? Good grief. Overboard much?

She says that her lawyer is telling her that it's reasonable because of her perception of my "lack of good judgement" concerning how quickly I moved everything, from separation til now.

Her perception? Her perception means jack -- the one whose opinion matters is the court's. And the court is going to be looking at whether or not these people pose an immediate danger to the children, whether the house is safe per health codes and what not and as such.

I will admit that I didn't do things in the best way possible, but that's not for this thread, nor these forums. I told her to go back to her lawyer and ask him if she had the right to restrict my visitation like that. I have a feeling she might have a different tune today if she does.

She doesn't have a right. Dude I practice domestic relations/family/juvenile law in Ohio courts. She does not have the right to restrict your visitation at all. The only one that can restrict your visitation legally is the COURT! Now grow some balls and tell your ex that you will be taking the children with you on your time and she doesn't have a say so (unless of course it is necessary per the court order or law-- such as travel). I hate stupid controlling parents. But they make my job so easy in court IF they are not my clients.

 

[SharonS]

Kalso,

I am a woman in Louisiana who remarried a divorced man not too long after his divorce (1 year). I love this man and will be around for a LONG time. (and No, I was not the cause of the divorce)

I think that there are a lot of spiteful people out there who will begrudge others their right to happiness. Yes, you have to put your children ahead in your life, but no law anywhere says you have to be a monk either. I think if you are really serious about this woman, it is fine to introduce her to your children. Just make SURE they have quality time with you, too- alone time. But, I would think it's unfair to just see her without them knowing- and then spring her on them as a serious relationship in the future. How much sense would that make?

I agree though that the courts are funny about this issue. Maybe an attorney is the best to ask about the legalities of it. I think though that as long as your children are not at risk (and you don't have sleepovers with a new woman every night) their mental health will be fine. Just be honest with how you feel- and make sure your children know you love them. I think the fact that their mom is trying to control YOU and who you see and what you do with your children- (which I assume the control may be part of the reason you left?)- will be frowned on by the court.

i wish you the best. It's hard and my husband is still fighting with custody, so I can empathize!
Sharon

 

[Kalso]

Two months later...

...and nothing's changed. She's threatening to take me back to court and change the visitation order because I want to leave our 8 month old with my fiancee, with whom I've been living for the last two months, while I go out in the yard and spend one-on-one time with my three-year old. Or she said she won't let me have the girls this weekend. I'm done with her threats, and I am looking for some representation should it become necessary. I'm not sure if I can ask here, or what venue would be appropriate.

If any of you have suggestions, or any help whatsoever, send me a private message, or contact me using the information in my profile.

Thanks.

 

[LdiJ]

...and nothing's changed. She's threatening to take me back to court and change the visitation order because I want to leave our 8 month old with my fiancee, with whom I've been living for the last two months, while I go out in the yard and spend one-on-one time with my three-year old. Or she said she won't let me have the girls this weekend. I'm done with her threats, and I am looking for some representation should it become necessary. I'm not sure if I can ask here, or what venue would be appropriate.

If any of you have suggestions, or any help whatsoever, send me a private message, or contact me using the information in my profile.

Thanks.

I won't say anything else other than to ask you how you would feel if the rolls were reversed....and advise you to react accordingly.

 

[Kalso]

I won't say anything else other than to ask you how you would feel if the rolls were reversed....and advise you to react accordingly.

All I'm trying to do is be prepared in the event she follows through on her threats. I'm tired of her trampling on my rights as their father, not giving me the respect of that position, and treating any dissenting opinion from her own as completely worthless.

I have known this woman for awhile, and we are engaged to be married. She has raised two girls on her own, AND helped them cope with her own divorce (which happened over a year ago). I have offered, out of respect for her role as our children's mother, to answer any questions about her to my ex-wife. She hasn't asked any. Given that, if the roles were reversed, I wouldn't have any objection whatsoever. Furthermore, I know that she wouldn't do anything to put our children into a harmful situation (a respect that she has not reciporacated), and so would trust her judgement where this is concerned.

If the roles were reversed, I'd be telling her to have a good weekend, and not threatening interference and court action.

 

[ceara19]

my fiancee, with whom I've been living for the last two months,

She finds my apartment unsuitable because I'm going to have a roommate come next month.

There is a HUGE difference between a ROOMMATE and living with a person that you are having a relationship with. It's extremely moronic to LIE to people that are in a position to HELP you.

 

[LdiJ]

All I'm trying to do is be prepared in the event she follows through on her threats. I'm tired of her trampling on my rights as their father, not giving me the respect of that position, and treating any dissenting opinion from her own as completely worthless.

I have known this woman for awhile, and we are engaged to be married. She has raised two girls on her own, AND helped them cope with her own divorce (which happened over a year ago). I have offered, out of respect for her role as our children's mother, to answer any questions about her to my ex-wife. She hasn't asked any. Given that, if the roles were reversed, I wouldn't have any objection whatsoever. Furthermore, I know that she wouldn't do anything to put our children into a harmful situation (a respect that she has not reciporacated), and so would trust her judgement where this is concerned.

If the roles were reversed, I'd be telling her to have a good weekend, and not threatening interference and court action.

Really? Are you sure that you would not have a problem if she brought another daddy figure into the mix so quickly? If so...then fine...if not, then think it through.

 

[ceara19]

Really? Are you sure that you would not have a problem if she brought another daddy figure into the mix so quickly? If so...then fine...if not, then think it through.

He flat out LIED to everyone here. He knows damn good and well that having a "roommate" is far different that playing house with the new girlfriend. At this point, there is no reason that anyone should believe anything he has to say.

 

[Kalso]

There is a HUGE difference between a ROOMMATE and living with a person that you are having a relationship with. It's extremely moronic to LIE to people that are in a position to HELP you.

The roomate was an issue before, back in September. Now, I'm bringing my fiancee into it. I see why you're confused, and why it seems misleading, I just tacked on this new issue to my old thread. Prehaps I should've separated them. I apologize for any misunderstanding.

I also want to say, that by "leaving her alone" with my 8 month old, I'm talking about me and my 3-year old going out into the yard to kick the ball. I'm not talking about me and my 3 year old going to a movie, and to the mall, and being gone all day, I'm talking about me being right outside.

The funny thing is, she was as adamant against the roommate as she has been about the fiancee

 

[Kalso]

He flat out LIED to everyone here. He knows damn good and well that having a "roommate" is far different that playing house with the new girlfriend. At this point, there is no reason that anyone should believe anything he has to say.

I haven't lied, I described two different situations.

You're right, I know damn well the difference between the two. The roommate thing worked out fine, by the way, for anyone who cares. He gets along with them just fine, and my 3-year old has taken a liking to him, actually.

 

[Kalso]

Maybe I should also say that I moved out of that apartment, where the roommate moved into, and moved in with my fiancee. So the roommate now lives in the apartment I used to live in, and that's where I've been having my visitations since my home is now too far away for me to reasonably bring my children here.

And, if it matters, I still pay partial rent and bills at the apartment as kind of compensation to the roommate for my interruptions every other week.

 

[ceara19]

Maybe I should also say that I moved out of that apartment, where the roommate moved into, and moved in with my fiancee. So the roommate now lives in the apartment I used to live in, and that's where I've been having my visitations since my home is now too far away for me to reasonably bring my children here.

And, if it matters, I still pay partial rent and bills at the apartment as kind of compensation to the roommate for my interruptions every other week.

So you see the children at your old apartment and NOT at the home you share with your fiance? If that's the case, why is the girlfriend an issue at all?