Mother passed away last night.....

[cgcivy79]

What is the name of your state? Ohio

My friends son's mother passed away last night. They have a child together. They were never married. Paternity and a child support/visitation order was established in 2001. Doesn't that leave the father to the first next of kin?

His son is currently with his half brother's grandmother *she is NO blood relative to his son. She is refusing to give him his son saying that she wants to keep him because she wants the boys to grow up together.

He of course doesn't have copies of his child support/visitation orders on hand because he never really kept track of where they were so when he went to the police station they told him that since all he had was a child support order worksheet from his employer for witholding there was nothing he could do until Tuesday when the courts are open and gets his visitation order. Does that make sense? His son is with a non-relative and he's supposed to be there until the courts open on Tuesday?? The reason the lady has him to begin with is the mother went out last night to a bar (passed away on the way home from the bar) and the lady was babysitting him because it wasn't his father's weekend with him.

Any help would be appreciated!!

 

[stealth2]

Since he doesn't know where his documentation is, the cop's right - he has to wait until Tuesday to take it in front of a judge.

 

[cgcivy79]

Since he doesn't know where his documentation is, the cop's right - he has to wait until Tuesday to take it in front of a judge.

Why would he have to take it in front of a judge?

 

[BelizeBreeze]

Why would he have to take it in front of a judge?

Because, he has no proof and the police aren't just going to hand the kid over to a stranger. If there is a custody order then he doesn't need to go in front of a judge. All he needs to do is produce the showing of paternity in the court file and custody determination then ask for assistance.

 

[cgcivy79]

Because, he has no proof and the police aren't just going to hand the kid over to a stranger. If there is a custody order then he doesn't need to go in front of a judge. All he needs to do is produce the showing of paternity in the court file and custody determination then ask for assistance.

Uhhh.... isn't the fact that he was ordered to pay her child support and his/hers and the childs name was on the paper proof that paternity was established? they can't just go making people pay child support without some type of paternity!

 

[stealth2]

Dude - the cops said that they won't help him get the kid w/o a judge's order. So what do YOU suggest he do?

 

[nextwife]

Because, he has no proof and the police aren't just going to hand the kid over to a stranger. If there is a custody order then he doesn't need to go in front of a judge. All he needs to do is produce the showing of paternity in the court file and custody determination then ask for assistance.

The kid's ALREADY with a stranger. They KNOW mom is dead, they KNOW he is dad. Seems that the person who has custody NOW has even LESS proof of any right to hang onto the child.

How old is this child? Presumably the CHILD knows who their father is. I sure don't carry proof around with me that my daughter IS my daughter- yet when she got seperated at the State Fair- the police did not require ANY "proof" I was mom. They simply handed her over - SHE obviously kinew I was mom!

How old is this child?

 

[cgcivy79]

Dude - the cops said that they won't help him get the kid w/o a judge's order. So what do YOU suggest he do?

First off, I'm not a dude..... second... my question still remains unanswered. Why would a judge have to order him to get his kid when he IS the biological father, paternity HAS been established and he is the ONLY living relative the kid has? Does Ohio law not specify that if an unwed mother dies, who would get the child??? That makes no sense!!

 

[cgcivy79]

The kid's ALREADY with a stranger. They KNOW mom is dead, they KNOW he is dad. Seems that the person who has custody NOW has even LESS proof of any right to hang onto the child.

The mother just died this morning...... at like 2am.... so technically... the person he is with does NOT have custody, nor is she a blood relative!. She just has him in her possession and refuses to give him to his father......

 

[cgcivy79]

The kid's ALREADY with a stranger. They KNOW mom is dead, they KNOW he is dad. Seems that the person who has custody NOW has even LESS proof of any right to hang onto the child.

How old is this child? Presumably the CHILD knows who their father is. I sure don't carry proof around with me that my daughter IS my daughter- yet when she got seperated at the State Fair- the police did not require ANY "proof" I was mom. They simply handed her over - SHE obviously kinew I was mom!

How old is this child?

The child is 8. He knows who dad is.

 

[stealth2]

And again, the cops have said that they will not force this woman to turn the child over to him w/o a court order. Therefore, he needs a court order. I don't know how to make it any more clear. Right, wrong, fair or not - that is what he needs to do. Period. End of story.

 

[cgcivy79]

And again, the cops have said that they will not force this woman to turn the child over to him w/o a court order. Therefore, he needs a court order. I don't know how to make it any more clear. Right, wrong, fair or not - that is what he needs to do. Period. End of story.

The cops told him he needed his visitation order. They obviously know that mom had custody before her death. He can not find it, so he has to wait to get a copy of it from the court house on Tuesday. So**************. after he gets his visitation order from the courts, gets his kid...... does he have to file for "custody" or is it automatically granted considering the mother is dead?

 

[Ohiogal]

He would need to finalize things by showing that MOM is dead and that he just didn't walk off with the kid. Not usually a big problem.

 

[rmet4nzkx]

More than likely when the police notified the caretaker of the children of the mother's death, they and or CPS made some temporary determination as to the temporary placement of the children since it was out of normal business hours. Unless your boyfriend can locate a judge in the jurisdiction to make an emergency order to rip this grieving child away from a place the police already determined was safe and appropriate, if it wasn't they would have placed the children in foster care, then he will have to wait until Tuesday because it is a holiday weekend, before he goes to the courthouse and confirms his custody, gets some court order granting him at least temporary guardianship and makes arrangement for a gal to be appointed for the child's financial interests and also sign up to be the child's rep payee for social security if there will be survivor benefits. A lot of work for dad to do on Tuesday morning and not appropriate to drag a child through all that. Dad will also have to make arrangements for the immediate and continuous care of the child, child care while working etc and expect maternal grandparents or others with established relationships to request visitation. Now is not the time for strife. Remember you are not a blood relative either and therefore a legal stranger to the child.