Yes, but a distinction is necessary because the analytical framework and the burdens of proof for sexual harassment are very different than the ones for sex discrimination.
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Female boss was hitting on me
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To answer some questions. The supervisor in question asked me to breakfast (we worked early hours) several times and when she wasn't successful she suggested that we just go out as friends instead. I was hearing from some of my female co-workers was that my supervisor was very interested in dating me (for the record I am not gay, not that it matters).
This was before she became my supervisor. When she normally asked me out it was on a nextel and my response was to ignore the request. Maybe I should have piped back "not interested" but I didn't because I felt that it would hurt our working relationship.
She recently became my supervisor within the last 4-5 months. Immediately afterward she began to question whether we would be able to get along with each other at work. She said that she thought we were going to have problems. I told her she was the boss and I would not interfere with her decisions about how to run things.
My review was last Monday. I notified my supervisor's manager approx a month prior that my supervisor had asked me out several times and that I wasn't sure that she would be able to give me a non-objective review. I never mentioned sexual harassment. I even told the manager that she didn't make sexual advances towards me.
About a week and a half before the review, I was called to HR and recounted my story. They asked me what remedy I thought would be appropriate and I told them that it would probably be a good idea if she wasn't my supervisor. They said they would take that into consideration.
Nothing was done and my review included a comment that I supposedly made that I don't even remember making. My supervisor had supposedly asked me to do something and I supposedly said, "You do it, that is why you make the big bucks?"
Today, I found out that this comment was supposedly made months ago. The first time I heard about this issue was through my review form. Not only that but there were other things on there saying that I was lax in my job because I was having to be reminded to do a specific function of my job. That was absolutely not true and they had no evidence to support the claim.
I also asked my superior in our department manager's office today if she heard that I went to HR. She said that she was aware of it. I then asked if she held any resentment towards me for that or the fact that I didn't respond to her earlier advances. That is when the meeting was cut short by my department manager. Now, it appears that I have to go back to HR.
This was before she became my supervisor. When she normally asked me out it was on a nextel and my response was to ignore the request. Maybe I should have piped back "not interested" but I didn't because I felt that it would hurt our working relationship.
She recently became my supervisor within the last 4-5 months. Immediately afterward she began to question whether we would be able to get along with each other at work. She said that she thought we were going to have problems. I told her she was the boss and I would not interfere with her decisions about how to run things.
My review was last Monday. I notified my supervisor's manager approx a month prior that my supervisor had asked me out several times and that I wasn't sure that she would be able to give me a non-objective review. I never mentioned sexual harassment. I even told the manager that she didn't make sexual advances towards me.
About a week and a half before the review, I was called to HR and recounted my story. They asked me what remedy I thought would be appropriate and I told them that it would probably be a good idea if she wasn't my supervisor. They said they would take that into consideration.
Nothing was done and my review included a comment that I supposedly made that I don't even remember making. My supervisor had supposedly asked me to do something and I supposedly said, "You do it, that is why you make the big bucks?"
Today, I found out that this comment was supposedly made months ago. The first time I heard about this issue was through my review form. Not only that but there were other things on there saying that I was lax in my job because I was having to be reminded to do a specific function of my job. That was absolutely not true and they had no evidence to support the claim.
I also asked my superior in our department manager's office today if she heard that I went to HR. She said that she was aware of it. I then asked if she held any resentment towards me for that or the fact that I didn't respond to her earlier advances. That is when the meeting was cut short by my department manager. Now, it appears that I have to go back to HR.
Thats usually the case when someone is fishing for the answers they want to hear.
I just left it alone for others to respond, but you got the same take on it that I did.
Why do you think your supervisor felt that you and she couldn't get along once she became your supervisor? Did you get along with your prior supervisor? Were you a candidate for the position she got? Had she criticized your performance before your written review? Something's missing here and I'm not sure it has a lot to do with going out to breakfast or dating.
Firstly, I don't remember making the comment. If she took something I said out of context months ago why didn't she bring it up to me sooner? As far as I am concerned the comment is invented. I just don't tell my supervisors that I am not going to do what they ask. I didn't lie about that.
Secondly, about the harassment. That is why I posted this in the first place. I am not a lawyer. I wouldn't know harassment if it came up and bit me. I do know that the department manager tried to make a case against me on my review form. Most of the things she put there were detrimental and not accurate.
For instance, I work with contractors who do a service for the company. One line of my review said that I need to talk to the contractors about service complaints. Later in the form it said that I became confrontational with a contracter and when a manager called to discuss the incident I raised my voice with him.
Here is what really happened. I talked to the contractor about her service complaints like I was supposed to. I was not confrontational but I was firm. The contractor happened to be a manager's daughter. He called to chew me out about talking to his daughter and I tried to tell him that I was only doing my job. He started yelling. The call ended with both of us hanging up on each other and agreeing to talk about it in the office with the department manager.
During that meeting he told the departmental manager that I was not being disrespectful to his daughter but that he called me because she was upset. At the end of our meeting the manager and I shook hands and went back to being friends.
Should that incident have been included on my review saying that I was confrontational with a contractor (no relation specified) and when a manager called to discuss I raised my voice. Does that paint an accurate picture?
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My supervisor is a little nutty. That is one of the main reasons that I am not interested in her. She got the job as my supervisor after several attempts in three years. The company was hiring off the street to fill positions before they finally relented and promoted her.
I don't want the position. I have been offered the position more than once and have turned it down. I wasn't a candidate for the position because I didn't apply for the position. Normally, I don't have a problem getting along with the managers.
When she made the comment that she didn't think we could get along, that worried me.
I tried to calm her fears at that time but it kinda took me by surprise. I wasn't catching the same vibe from our interaction that she was. I thought we were getting along okay, (as good as could be expected at least). Maybe it is because I was not overly friendly with her. I was trying not to lead her on.
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As long as the discussion is not cynical I don't mind if I don't get an exact answer. I am mostly wanting to discuss the situation with knowlegable people. Do you think I am looking for someone who says to go ahead and sue the company? I don't really care about that. I am just looking to protect myself.
Protect yourself from WHAT? This is NOT a discussion board.
Protect myself from being fired. I am also questioning the validity of the company's review process. They attach a pay rate to performance. None of my co-workers in the department gets more than a "commendable" on overall performance (I checked). I found earlier by accident that one of my married co-workers was making more than I was even though he had less time with the company (common). I learned that his review was "superior," a level above commendable. I know for an absolute fact that he was not a superior performer. Why did he get a superior performance review? My thought is that the company wanted to justify his pay rate. I also questioned this. So yes, this goes a little deeper..lol
My reviewing manager, one below the department manager and one above my supervisor, told me that nobody ever gets a superior. It was virtually impossible to get. She said she doesn't even give it to her best performers. The other person in the department who got it had a different reviewing manager. I posed this question to HR. I asked them to be specific and tell me why my co-worker got the superior. They wouldn't answer.
I went into my review thinking that I wanted a clean review based soley on my performance. I wanted to remove people from the review process who I thought might hold a grudge. My immediate supervisor is a prime example. She asked me out and I rejected her. Do you think I want her input into my performance review?
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Zigner
Senior Member, Non-Attorney
Of course not, it's NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS! You are a trouble-maker.
(sorry couldn't resist pointing that out)
You don't get to choose those who will be in your review process. The woman is your supervisor and supervisors have input into the performance review of their subordinates. And, while you may question the validity of your company's review process, there's not anything you can do to change it. And, contrary to what most people think or want, subjective reviews typically are based on more than performance. So, I'm back to my original advice: You should focus on doing your work, examine your performance in light of her review comments and figure out how you are going to redeem your working relationship. You might ask those who do your review what you need to do to earn a "superior" rating and focus on doing that.
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