Strictly Hypothetical

[CJane]

What is the name of your state? MO and KS

I know that in the event of one parent's death the other parent has the most standing to receive custody of a minor child barring unfitness.

My question is what, if any, legal obligation do the family members of the deceased have to attempt to contact the other parent and inform him/her of the death of the primary parent?

My younger sister (in KS) has a son by a man she's never had a relationship with. He's the legal father of the child, there is a child support order that he occasionally complies with, but no visitation order at all and he's not made any attempt to see the child in the past 7 years. He does know how/where to contact her as they live in the same general area and have seen each other in passing at area hangouts and share common acquaintences. She's made no effort to keep him from seeing the child.

If she were to die, how hard do we as her family members have to try to contact the father so that the child can be 'handed over'? Are we under ANY obligation to do so?

Does the obligation (if there is one) vary by state? Since I also have a son w/an uninvolved father, but live in MO is it perhaps different?

In the 'real world', how often do the courts rule that a completely uninvolved parent who hasn't had contact (by choice) for several years be awarded custody of a child over family who has been very involved since day 1?

In cases such as this, how does one go about establishing stand-by guardianship so that the child is not sent into state custody pending notification of the other parent (if required)? Is it even necessary? If I were to die tomorrow and my sister took my son into her home... what would be the next step legally wrt the child?

 

[penny4u]

I obviously don't know the legal answer but I posed the same questions to my attorney when my son's bio popped in after 8 years. He told me that yes he would have the first right to my son, but would have to go through MANY hoops to get him in the event of my death since he had never been involved. So I created a will and I KNOW that you cannot will children, but put my husband first then my sister to get custody of my son. My attorney advised me to do this even though we all knew my husband would have never gotten my son. My sister had a better shot. Also, I put in the will my personal and factual reasons for not wanting the bio to get custody. The big thing to me that eased my mind was that I'd still have a "voice" after my death, and included requests that my family have ample visitation with my son. My attorney said that if he did get custody and didn't let my family see my son, my request for my family to have visitation in the will, would win in court.
That at least made me feel better.

I know this doesn't anwer any questions, but thought I'd share what I was told and did.

 

[ezmarelda]

I have been wondering too...in CA
My cousin's 2 youngest have NO LEGAL fathers...what happens then?????

 

[gofigure20]

This is almost the exact situation my son is going through at this time.

Tell your family to go to the court house and file for emergency custody...immediately, before the other parent finds out about the death. If the judge grants it, they are home free....unless the father really wants his child, and hires an attorney, and it will cost him BIG!!! The father will have to prove himself fit, and in the best interest of the child

 

[fairisfair]

This is almost the exact situation my son is going through at this time.

Tell your family to go to the court house and file for emergency custody...immediately, before the other parent finds out about the death. If the judge grants it, they are home free....unless the father really wants his child, and hires an attorney, and it will cost him BIG!!! The father will have to prove himself fit, and in the best interest of the child

quite possibly, some of the worst advice I have ever heard.

 

[gofigure20]

may be the worst advice...but it worked...my son has been living in custody "he**" for 7 months now, because his dead girlfriend's mother beat him to the court house.

 

[fairisfair]

may be the worst advice...but it worked...my son has been living in custody "he**" for 7 months now, because his dead girlfriend's mother beat him to the court house.

key word . . . . . girlfriend

 

[gofigure20]

My younger sister (in KS) has a son by a man she's never had a relationship with. He's the legal father of the child, there is a child support order

yes...just like in the hypothetical question!

 

[fairisfair]

My younger sister (in KS) has a son by a man she's never had a relationship with. He's the legal father of the child, there is a child support order

yes...just like in the hypothetical question!

really, she had a child by a man she has never had a relationship with?? hmmmmm

so there is a support order, is she dead? does he have custody, or did he get to the courthouse too late too? no, then what does that have to do with the questions posed by the poster regarding custody in the event of death? or to be more exact, a family's legal responsibility to notify the other parent of that death. (by the way, to my knowledge, there is none)

 

[gofigure20]

that wasa cut and paste directly from the hypothetical question..


In cases such as this, how does one go about establishing stand-by guardianship so that the child is not sent into state custody pending notification of the other parent (if required)? Is it even necessary? If I were to die tomorrow and my sister took my son into her home... what would be the next step legally wrt the child?

another cut and paste....

Just telling you how it worked...she needs to get to the court house first, and file for emergency custody...or guardianship...it does work...he is living it, and he is the DNA ceertified father that never missed a child support payment, just lived to far away to win the race to the court house.

 

[Gracie3787]

What is the name of your state? MO and KS

I know that in the event of one parent's death the other parent has the most standing to receive custody of a minor child barring unfitness.

My question is what, if any, legal obligation do the family members of the deceased have to attempt to contact the other parent and inform him/her of the death of the primary parent?

My younger sister (in KS) has a son by a man she's never had a relationship with. He's the legal father of the child, there is a child support order that he occasionally complies with, but no visitation order at all and he's not made any attempt to see the child in the past 7 years. He does know how/where to contact her as they live in the same general area and have seen each other in passing at area hangouts and share common acquaintences. She's made no effort to keep him from seeing the child.

If she were to die, how hard do we as her family members have to try to contact the father so that the child can be 'handed over'? Are we under ANY obligation to do so?

Does the obligation (if there is one) vary by state? Since I also have a son w/an uninvolved father, but live in MO is it perhaps different?

In the 'real world', how often do the courts rule that a completely uninvolved parent who hasn't had contact (by choice) for several years be awarded custody of a child over family who has been very involved since day 1?

In cases such as this, how does one go about establishing stand-by guardianship so that the child is not sent into state custody pending notification of the other parent (if required)? Is it even necessary? If I were to die tomorrow and my sister took my son into her home... what would be the next step legally wrt the child?

I really don't know for sure what the family's legal obligation would be, but I did have a thought about it. Maybe it would be up to the executor of the estate. I know that if there's a CS order, somebody will have the responsibility of doing something about the CS payments, which would involve the NCP being informed of the death. So, my completely uneducated guess is that either the executor would be required to inform the NCP, or inform the CSE agency who could in turn, inform the NCP.
That's just my opinion, hopefully someone who knows the exact answer will post.