Please Help

[carriem]

Florida

My ex and I have an almost 2 yr old son, we've never been married, the judge granted a temporary restraining order on him, and gave me temproary sole custody of our son until our hearing Apr. 10th. My ex is a rampant alcoholic and has been drinking everyday for a month, he wants visitation rights and I want him to have to go through a detox program first and then have supervised visitation. How do I prove that he's an alcoholic and verbally abusive? Also, he has been drunk home alone with our son prior to his moving out but it will be his word against mine. I've never had to call the police although I should have, He's been steadily harassing me by phone for a month thus the restraining order. He also was calling my dad drunk and wanting him to meet him in town I assume to fight, my dad is 65 years old. My mom has overheard the phone calls harassing me, I have his phone records of where he continuously called me. Do I need to hire a private detective to film drinking all the time and driving while drinking? Would that help. Any ideas would be greatly appreicated

 

[Ohiogal]

Florida

My ex and I have an almost 2 yr old son, we've never been married, the judge granted a temporary restraining order on him, and gave me temproary sole custody of our son until our hearing Apr. 10th.

Ok.

My ex is a rampant alcoholic and has been drinking everyday for a month,

How do you KNOW this?

he wants visitation rights

Which he will get.

and I want him to have to go through a detox program first

Him being an alcoholic is NOT illegal. UNLESS his alcoholism has put the child in immediate danger you cannot count on a judge ordering that. You were with this man for a while apparently and thought he was okay to have a child with.

and then have supervised visitation.

Can you prove he is a DANGER to the child? Most probably not.


How do I prove that he's an alcoholic and verbally abusive?

Good luck especially considering:

Also, he has been drunk home alone with our son prior to his moving out but it will be his word against mine.

And knowing that he is an alcoholic and verbally abusive you STILL trusted him with your child. And no harm apparently came to the child while in his care. So you have shown a court if you bring this up that you were either criminally negligent or you trust this man to watch your child.


I've never had to call the police although I should have, He's been steadily harassing me by phone for a month thus the restraining order. He also was calling my dad drunk and wanting him to meet him in town I assume to fight, my dad is 65 years old.

You assume? Nope. Not good enough. Prove it was to fight. He could have just wanted to talk to your dad about his child.


My mom has overheard the phone calls harassing me, I have his phone records of where he continuously called me. Do I need to hire a private detective to film drinking all the time and driving while drinking? Would that help. Any ideas would be greatly appreicated

How did you get HIS phone records? Hiring a private detective may be frowned upon by the judge. And drinking is NOT illegal. Driving while drinking is. Driving after drinking may not be. Because video is not going to prove necessarily that he is drunk. And technically you can drink and drive and it NOT be against the law. It is not always smart but it is NOT ALWAYS against the law.

 

[carriem]

Phone Records

He has a boost mobile phone and I set the online information up for him, with his permission at the time, and I can view his calls.

 

[ceara19]

He has a boost mobile phone and I set the online information up for him, with his permission at the time, and I can view his calls.

Unless he has given you permission to view his calls and you can PROVE that you have his permission, you need to stop. The information is inadmissible in court and the Judge will NOT take your blatant disregard for the LAW and dad's privacy lightly.

 

[carriem]

Boost Mobile

What if my credit card had been on the account and was used to add minutes to the phone by my permission?

 

[fairisfair]

What if my credit card had been on the account and was used to add minutes to the phone by my permission?

So, you pay to add minutes to his phone so that he can call you and your family and harrass you??? That is hilarious.

 

[carriem]

Payment for minutes

I paid for his card while we were together when he got the phone, so from October of '06 until 3/9/07 which is about the time he left. I didn't think about the phone/credit card info until a couple of days later.... I am not currently paying it anymore. Oh and I'm glad my pain can amuse you.

 

[devmazz]

I paid for his card while we were together when he got the phone, so from October of '06 until 3/9/07 which is about the time he left. I didn't think about the phone/credit card info until a couple of days later.... I am not currently paying it anymore. Oh and I'm glad my pain can amuse you.

Just because you paid for the minutes does not give you legal right to hack into his boost account and get his phone records. You can get yourself into legal trouble doing that.

 

[devmazz]

Florida

My ex and I have an almost 2 yr old son, we've never been married, the judge granted a temporary restraining order on him, and gave me temproary sole custody of our son until our hearing Apr. 10th.

you were granted a temporary restraining order due to phone harassment? you could ask for supervised visits through a Family Visitation Center when you go before the judge (most of them here in Florida are run by the United Way) but it's not guaranteed that he will have to be supervised. There are hefty rules that go along with using the VCs for visits, including him signing a form that states he is aware that if he shows up for a visit and is suspected of being under the influence of drugs or alcohol that his visit will be denied and the police will be called.

 

[carriem]

Restraining Order

The injunction was issued because I was afraid of him coming out and hurting/harassing me at my home because he was contantly drunk when he was calling.