Extra Curricular activities and Court Orders

[Calimom3]

What is the name of your state? CA

Casa, this question is for you because you know CA very well.

I have joint physical and legal custody of 2 children with my EH. Because we live approx. 55 miles apart, our custody split is that I have the children on Wed. 3:00-8:00 PM and 3 weekends a month. I have a court order that states in Paragraph 3.B.3. : "During the school year the Petitioner (me) shall make the children physically available to participate in team sports activities on Saturday of the first weekend of each month, between 9am and 1 pm."

It goes on to state: "Neither party shall plan activities for the children during the other party's period of care, with exception to provision of Paragraph 3.B.3."

My EH has of course has interpreted this to mean that hecan unilaterly sign the children up for any and every team sporting activity under the sun during the school year, whether or not they are interested in playing. Never mind if they overlap each other or they wont make one game because they are playing in another game.

I told my EH that I do not agree with him unilaterly signing the children up for sports without discussion with me and I do not agree with him overloading thier schedules, especially when it's activities that they do not care about at all. While I dont agree with his tactics, I have abided by the court order and brought them to thier activities above and beyone what was placed in the court order. (Please note, my FORMER lawyer told me that if I dont agree with the activities my EH has signed them up for or if the children have never shown interest in the particular sport then I dont have to bring them down. This also the lawyer that added the language regarding the "exception" in at the request of the EH lawyer, without discussion or approval from me)

Here are my questions: Based on the wording of the order, does my EH have the right to unilaterally sign the children up for any activity he wants during the school year, without discussion or agreement from me? If so, what would be the best way to get this, and while I am at it a few other things changed? My order was signed by the judge on November 2nd 2006, is it too early to make changes?

 

[moburkes]

Parents can, and, often do, sign their children up for activities that they are not interested in. School is one of them. However, you have no obligation to "make" the kids attend any activity that occurs on your time, except that first Saturday provision.

 

[casa]

Parents can, and, often do, sign their children up for activities that they are not interested in. School is one of them. However, you have no obligation to "make" the kids attend any activity that occurs on your time, except that first Saturday provision.

Exactly~ Therefore ANY activity that does NOT occur on the FIRST SATURDAY of the month between the hours of 9am and 1pm....is NOT your problem.

Perhaps if EH has to run arround for those other 3 wknds explaining where the kid(s) are, he'll get the hint.

What concerns me is this, WHY was an extra-curricular provision put IN the Court Order in the first place?? That is not typical & usually happens when a child has a long-standing history in a sport....and their involvement requires specific amounts of participation/attendance.

Either way you only have to follow what the Court Order states...Not what your EH would like to toss in on his own whim.

 

[Calimom3]

Exactly~ Therefore ANY activity that does NOT occur on the FIRST SATURDAY of the month between the hours of 9am and 1pm....is NOT your problem.

Perhaps if EH has to run arround for those other 3 wknds explaining where the kid(s) are, he'll get the hint.

What concerns me is this, WHY was an extra-curricular provision put IN the Court Order in the first place?? That is not typical & usually happens when a child has a long-standing history in a sport....and their involvement requires specific amounts of participation/attendance.

Either way you only have to follow what the Court Order states...Not what your EH would like to toss in on his own whim.

The provision was put in the order because my EH is a "sports guy"... and wants them to play extra curricular team sports. Our children are 6 and 8, and are just starting with sports. This was one of his main issues during our custody hearing and because the judge was actually going to do a standard EOW schedule and I would loose a weekend, my lawyer came up with this arrangement.

I dont mind them playing sports, however, I would like to have a say in which ones they particapte in and how many sports they participate in during the school year.

Perhaps if EH has to run arround for those other 3 wknds explaining where the kid(s) are, he'll get the hint.

I would like to believe that would be true, however what ended up happening is that our kids wind up with hurt feelings because they missed a game or something, and guess who's fault THAT is.

Thank you both for your responses....I will just follow the order.....