They disagree on summer visitation order

[Gemini]

Laughter is the best medicine

Yeah, LdiJ, we were just joking. It would be great if we could do things along the lines that mom uses, but I like to keep things on the up and up. We know it would hurt dad's case, but it sure helps us keep smiling during the hard times of visitation hassles. Humor always helps!

We are going the "good guy" route and letting mom and boyfriend show their true colors. Dad has a consult with a new attorney on Wed., and plans to take the tapes and letters.

We don't believe for one minute that mom would comply with the flight arrangements even if we were lucky enough to get a flight (nonstop)to Knoxville. Non-stop isn't ordered, but dad also feels better knowing daughter won't have to change flights alone. It worries us that a 14yr old girl (immature) would be alone. I don't know if they follow the same rules for children under 12 that fly alone, but we are just not comfortable with her changing flights.

No one has mentioned whether or not mom will still be in contempt if she takes her to TN during dad's "wished" dates? I know it will make her look vindictive, since the court knows she is living back in FL, but will she be in contempt of the recent order?

 

[CJane]

No one has mentioned whether or not mom will still be in contempt if she takes her to TN during dad's "wished" dates? I know it will make her look vindictive, since the court knows she is living back in FL, but will she be in contempt of the recent order?

If dad's visitation is denied, mom is in contempt. BUT Dad has to actually attempt to get the visitation... so, if she's in TN, he has to either drive up there and attempt to get her, or make flight arrangements and have the kid not make the flight.

There's nothing in the order that states that the child can't be in TN for mom's portion of summer visitation, so Mom's not in contempt for taking the child there. And... the order states that dad is responsible for paying for flights...

Why is that particular period so important?

 

[Gemini]

There's nothing in the order that states that the child can't be in TN for mom's portion of summer visitation, so Mom's not in contempt for taking the child there. And... the order states that dad is responsible for paying for flights...

Agreed, but the time mom plans to take the child to TN is during the dates that dad chose for his part of the summer visitation.

The order states that dad has to provide his dates by the 15th of May, which he did. Dad has to be out of state for part of the time that mom wants him to have visitation. Shouldn't mom have waited until after May 15th to make her vacation plans? They won't give us a date in which they are going to be back from vacation, leading us to believe that no matter what dates dad chooses (other than the ones mom insist he take) she won't comply.

Would mom be in contempt of the order if she does not have the child available on the dates that dad chose by the 15th? Even if he makes flight arrangements with stops, mom still won't let her fly. In a phone conversation, boyfriend stated "go ahead and try to make flight arrangements, we've already checked and there are none available, so you will have to change your dates to the time we told you in our letter". Those dates are during the time that dad will be in Ohio.

 

[LdiJ]

Agreed, but the time mom plans to take the child to TN is during the dates that dad chose for his part of the summer visitation.

The order states that dad has to provide his dates by the 15th of May, which he did. Dad has to be out of state for part of the time that mom wants him to have visitation. Shouldn't mom have waited until after May 15th to make her vacation plans? They won't give us a date in which they are going to be back from vacation, leading us to believe that no matter what dates dad chooses (other than the ones mom insist he take) she won't comply.

Would mom be in contempt of the order if she does not have the child available on the dates that dad chose by the 15th? Even if he makes flight arrangements with stops, mom still won't let her fly. In a phone conversation, boyfriend stated "go ahead and try to make flight arrangements, we've already checked and there are none available, so you will have to change your dates to the time we told you in our letter". Those dates are during the time that dad will be in Ohio.

Dad could bite the bullet and just drive up there and get her. I know it would be a real pain, but there would not be a darned thing that mom could do about it, other than truly putting herself in contempt. That would seriously cause mom grief.

 

[CJane]

The order states that dad has to provide his dates by the 15th of May, which he did. Dad has to be out of state for part of the time that mom wants him to have visitation. Shouldn't mom have waited until after May 15th to make her vacation plans?

Yes, she should have.

Would mom be in contempt of the order if she does not have the child available on the dates that dad chose by the 15th?

Yes. BUT, she has to either not allow dad to pick the child up at her residence in FL or refuse to put the child on a plane. Until she does one of those two things, she's not in contempt.

Even if he makes flight arrangements with stops, mom still won't let her fly.

Ok. But you can't KNOW that until the arrangements are made and mom doesn't put her on the flight.

In a phone conversation, boyfriend stated "go ahead and try to make flight arrangements, we've already checked and there are none available, so you will have to change your dates to the time we told you in our letter".

And, there ARE flights available. Just not non-stop ones. And the order doesn't specify non-stop flights.

Those dates are during the time that dad will be in Ohio.

And that sucks. But unless dad makes arrangements to attempt to get the visitation he's requested, mom isn't going to look all that bad. She'll just say "He didn't buy a plane ticket like the order says he has to, and so what was I supposed to do? I offered him make up time at the end of summer, and he didn't want that either."

 

[Gemini]

Thank you all for your help. I think top priority should be for dad to follow up on the visitation modification to prevent this mess from happening again. I guess I will suggest to dad that he make plans to pick her up on the 18th in FL and plans for a flight from TN on that day as well, so both bases are covered. He is also tossing around the idea of driving up there. Thanks again for the advice.

 

[Gemini]

Good news

Dad received a call from mom's boyfriend. They are folding. They are sending the daughter to stay with us for an extra 2 weeks. So dad gets his "wished" dates plus an extra 2 weeks, so that they can go ahead and leave for their vacation.