What is the name of your state? Oregon
My boyfriend and I have been together for 5 years. He has been divorced for 10 years. His ex wife has custody of his two children.
For the first 3 years we were together, we had the children every weekend, holiday, and all summer long. The ex wife did not have a problem with this, in fact she often asked us to take the kids.
My boyfriend lost his job of 7 years two years ago and has been unable to find meaningful, steady work since then. The mill burnt down in our small town. We just moved into a larger town so he can find better work.
OK Now, she met a man and moved. She called the police and said that her ex husband (my bf) had called her 44 times in one day, which is a lie. She had a no electronic (email, telephone) contact placed on him. This was one year ago.
She refuses to allow him to pick up the children, she refuses to allow him to speak with the children, she refuses to allow him to send someone to pick up the children. She moved more than 60 miles away without notifying us, and he has no idea what her address is and can not call because the telephone number is blocked.
This weekend, the children were dropped of at his sister's house, legally and per the divorce papers this was the third weekend of the month and thus his legal custodial visitation. He had not seen the children since Christmas.
His daughter told me that her mother has put her on a diet because she is too fat (she is 14) and that she wished she had never been born. The son (11) is not allowed to speak to his father. Thier mother told them very specifically that if she saw or heard that they were with their father they would be "in trouble."
As a mother myself, I am extremely worried about the emotional health of these children. The mother tells the son that the new step father is his real dad, the daughter is told she is too fat and stupid.
Our main fear is that because the new step father is, quite literally, a millionaire who just bought a brand new 600,000 dollar house and bought the ex wife a brand new car, and my boyfriend does not currently have gainful employment and has not been able to pay the 600$ monthly child support or the health insurance fees that regardless of our fears for the children's emotional safety we would not be awarded custody on the premise of us being broke. We are on food stamps and scraping by with what I make writing web content (don't base my writing ability on this post, I'm really emotional right now!)
What I need to know is:
1. How can we file for custody in Douglas county, Oregon?
2. What are the premise for considering her an unfit mother due to emotional abuse?
3. How can I get a non partial psychiatrist to evaluate these children's emotional state and the possible abuse occurring in the home by the mother?
4. Does money--that kind of money--and our lack of money, really make a huge impact on the court system? Does the fact that the father owes back child support prevent him from getting custody?
5. How can I subpoena the ex wife's telephone records to prove that she committed a false police report to prevent my boyfriend from seeing or talking to the children?
6. Please help us, I have no idea where to start but I know in my soul that what that woman is doing to these children is wrong.
7. Is refusing contact and refusing visitation for months and months on end (remember, we have no idea where her new house is) a type of custodial kidnapping? What laws protect their rights to see their father, or because he owes back child support is he not allowed to see them?
Please help, when I saw the kids this weekend I gave my boyfriends son a big hug and said that I missed him and loved him so much, and he said the same thing back and then I started crying. He pulled away and said his mother never hugs him like that, and it made him feel weird that I was hugging him. What kind of mother never holds their kids tight like they are supposed to be held and loved and cared for? I just don't understand their mother at all.
My boyfriend and I have been together for 5 years. He has been divorced for 10 years. His ex wife has custody of his two children.
For the first 3 years we were together, we had the children every weekend, holiday, and all summer long. The ex wife did not have a problem with this, in fact she often asked us to take the kids.
My boyfriend lost his job of 7 years two years ago and has been unable to find meaningful, steady work since then. The mill burnt down in our small town. We just moved into a larger town so he can find better work.
OK Now, she met a man and moved. She called the police and said that her ex husband (my bf) had called her 44 times in one day, which is a lie. She had a no electronic (email, telephone) contact placed on him. This was one year ago.
She refuses to allow him to pick up the children, she refuses to allow him to speak with the children, she refuses to allow him to send someone to pick up the children. She moved more than 60 miles away without notifying us, and he has no idea what her address is and can not call because the telephone number is blocked.
This weekend, the children were dropped of at his sister's house, legally and per the divorce papers this was the third weekend of the month and thus his legal custodial visitation. He had not seen the children since Christmas.
His daughter told me that her mother has put her on a diet because she is too fat (she is 14) and that she wished she had never been born. The son (11) is not allowed to speak to his father. Thier mother told them very specifically that if she saw or heard that they were with their father they would be "in trouble."
As a mother myself, I am extremely worried about the emotional health of these children. The mother tells the son that the new step father is his real dad, the daughter is told she is too fat and stupid.
Our main fear is that because the new step father is, quite literally, a millionaire who just bought a brand new 600,000 dollar house and bought the ex wife a brand new car, and my boyfriend does not currently have gainful employment and has not been able to pay the 600$ monthly child support or the health insurance fees that regardless of our fears for the children's emotional safety we would not be awarded custody on the premise of us being broke. We are on food stamps and scraping by with what I make writing web content (don't base my writing ability on this post, I'm really emotional right now!)
What I need to know is:
1. How can we file for custody in Douglas county, Oregon?
2. What are the premise for considering her an unfit mother due to emotional abuse?
3. How can I get a non partial psychiatrist to evaluate these children's emotional state and the possible abuse occurring in the home by the mother?
4. Does money--that kind of money--and our lack of money, really make a huge impact on the court system? Does the fact that the father owes back child support prevent him from getting custody?
5. How can I subpoena the ex wife's telephone records to prove that she committed a false police report to prevent my boyfriend from seeing or talking to the children?
6. Please help us, I have no idea where to start but I know in my soul that what that woman is doing to these children is wrong.
7. Is refusing contact and refusing visitation for months and months on end (remember, we have no idea where her new house is) a type of custodial kidnapping? What laws protect their rights to see their father, or because he owes back child support is he not allowed to see them?
Please help, when I saw the kids this weekend I gave my boyfriends son a big hug and said that I missed him and loved him so much, and he said the same thing back and then I started crying. He pulled away and said his mother never hugs him like that, and it made him feel weird that I was hugging him. What kind of mother never holds their kids tight like they are supposed to be held and loved and cared for? I just don't understand their mother at all.
