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luckymom

Member
My ex seems to have a bug up his behind these days. Another day, another issue. Here's the latest--I was allowed to relocate overseas with my daughter for one year for employment purposes. We've been here a month and all is going well. According to our order, if ex gives me 90 days notice, I need to buy him an air ticket to visit daughter during spring break. I've counted and he needs to give me notice in early January. The order names which airport the flight should originate from, but he doesn't want that airport, he wants another. I am not sure why and I don't really care. I've told him that if the other airport makes the ticket more expensive, he has to pay the difference. He's apparently not satisfied with that and sees I need to buy the ticket now or he will file to modify the order itself. The court order is literally two months old, so I don't even see if it is modifiable, since nothing has changed except for his preference. I just bought the ticket for daughter's Christmas visit and am short of cash. Moreover, it makes no sense to me to buy a ticket months before he has to give me notice.

I heard from my lawyer who said this thing is set for status next week. I don't want to pay a lawyer to represent me in this petty matter. I haven't been served or anything. Can I tell my lawyer not to go? Do I have an obligation to do anything if I haven't been served? How can it be set for status if nothing has been filed?
 


LdiJ

Senior Member
My ex seems to have a bug up his behind these days. Another day, another issue. Here's the latest--I was allowed to relocate overseas with my daughter for one year for employment purposes. We've been here a month and all is going well. According to our order, if ex gives me 90 days notice, I need to buy him an air ticket to visit daughter during spring break. I've counted and he needs to give me notice in early January. The order names which airport the flight should originate from, but he doesn't want that airport, he wants another. I am not sure why and I don't really care. I've told him that if the other airport makes the ticket more expensive, he has to pay the difference. He's apparently not satisfied with that and sees I need to buy the ticket now or he will file to modify the order itself. The court order is literally two months old, so I don't even see if it is modifiable, since nothing has changed except for his preference. I just bought the ticket for daughter's Christmas visit and am short of cash. Moreover, it makes no sense to me to buy a ticket months before he has to give me notice.

I heard from my lawyer who said this thing is set for status next week. I don't want to pay a lawyer to represent me in this petty matter. I haven't been served or anything. Can I tell my lawyer not to go? Do I have an obligation to do anything if I haven't been served? How can it be set for status if nothing has been filed?
It would be extremely foolish to not be represented by an attorney in court, when you are not able to be there yourself to represent yourself.
 

seniorjudge

Senior Member
Thanks for the reply, but shouldn't I have been served if he has filed for modification?
Obviously, you have been served:

"...I heard from my lawyer who said this thing is set for status next week. I don't want to pay a lawyer to represent me in this petty matter. I haven't been served or anything. Can I tell my lawyer not to go? Do I have an obligation to do anything if I haven't been served? How can it be set for status if nothing has been filed?..."

Your lawyer got served which means you got served.
 

luckymom

Member
Obviously, you have been served:

"...I heard from my lawyer who said this thing is set for status next week. I don't want to pay a lawyer to represent me in this petty matter. I haven't been served or anything. Can I tell my lawyer not to go? Do I have an obligation to do anything if I haven't been served? How can it be set for status if nothing has been filed?..."

Your lawyer got served which means you got served.
Thanks for the clarification. I finally got a response from my lawyer and was told that "there is no petition pending for anything. Just a court order for status on travel." So what does that mean . . .? As I mentioned, I am out of the country and there is a 12 hour time difference, so I am unable to speak with my lawyer and she is extremely cryptic in e-mail. I am still confused: if "travel" involves my ex's dissatisfaction with the current order, doesn't he have to file for modification?
 

profmum

Senior Member
As I mentioned, I am out of the country and there is a 12 hour time difference, so I am unable to speak with my lawyer and she is extremely cryptic in e-mail. I am still confused: if "travel" involves my ex's dissatisfaction with the current order, doesn't he have to file for modification?[/QUOTE]


Stay up till 9 pm your time and call your attorney!!
 

luckymom

Member
As I mentioned, I am out of the country and there is a 12 hour time difference, so I am unable to speak with my lawyer and she is extremely cryptic in e-mail. I am still confused: if "travel" involves my ex's dissatisfaction with the current order, doesn't he have to file for modification?

Stay up till 9 pm your time and call your attorney!! [/QUOTE]

In the past three days, I have left 4 messages. My busy attorney is often in court and doesn't give out her cell number.

How about just not answering if you don't have anything useful to offer?
 

TinkerBelleLuvr

Senior Member
Send a detailed email/fax to your attorney requesting more information. Mine is notorious for not filling in the blanks until SHE has all the information. Drives me nuts, but she really knows her stuff, so I cut some slack.

I have found that I get more information by sending the detailed questions, so she can respond between clients and court dates.
 

profmum

Senior Member
Stay up till 9 pm your time and call your attorney!!
In the past three days, I have left 4 messages. My busy attorney is often in court and doesn't give out her cell number.


Most of our attny's are busy, mine is as well, if she is not answering, then you have real communication issues given that you are overseas. Get those cleared otherwise you could risk a lot more liking being ordered to have your daugther brought back to the US!
 

luckymom

Member
Send a detailed email/fax to your attorney requesting more information. Mine is notorious for not filling in the blanks until SHE has all the information. Drives me nuts, but she really knows her stuff, so I cut some slack.

I have found that I get more information by sending the detailed questions, so she can respond between clients and court dates.
OK, so I sent my lawyer an e-mail explaining that I was confused about what is going on and asking explicitly 1) was I risking anything if she didn't show for the status? 2) to confirm that he did have to in fact have to file to modify if he wanted to change the signed order 3) to confirm that he hadn't in fact filed anything.

This is what I got in response:

"As it turns out I have an emergency in another court on Friday. You are
correct in that there are no pleadings pending. You are correct a petition
would have to be filed. Also, the judge is not going to allow any ex parte
orders when she knows I'm counsel of record."

As I read this rather pithy response, she can't go and doesn't think this will be a problem. I don't understand the mention of "ex parte orders." How could there be with nothing filed?
I am new to IL courts since divorce and all post-divorce stuff was in Texas. We never had status hearings there, so I still don't get what the point is and how they work.
 

LdiJ

Senior Member
OK, so I sent my lawyer an e-mail explaining that I was confused about what is going on and asking explicitly 1) was I risking anything if she didn't show for the status? 2) to confirm that he did have to in fact have to file to modify if he wanted to change the signed order 3) to confirm that he hadn't in fact filed anything.

This is what I got in response:

"As it turns out I have an emergency in another court on Friday. You are
correct in that there are no pleadings pending. You are correct a petition
would have to be filed. Also, the judge is not going to allow any ex parte
orders when she knows I'm counsel of record."

As I read this rather pithy response, she can't go and doesn't think this will be a problem. I don't understand the mention of "ex parte orders." How could there be with nothing filed?
I am new to IL courts since divorce and all post-divorce stuff was in Texas. We never had status hearings there, so I still don't get what the point is and how they work.
An ex-parte order is an order that a judge makes when only one party is present/represented. Often the other party is never even served with the motion. Generally that is done only in serious emergencies and this is NOT a serious emergency....not even remotely.

What she is saying is that the status hearing will end up getting postponed (continued) because she cannot be present, and that the judge won't make any orders without there being a properly served motion/petition.

So...in other words, the ex can't show up at the hearing and make a motion in person to change anything.
 

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