He disposed of my clothes!

[griffin]

What is the name of your state? NC

Separated last month after his verbal/emotional abuse turned physical. I have filed charges & am following thru. Divorce is certain.
We moved into the house together, unmarried, house is in his name. After marriage, refinanced the mortgage in both names. After marriage we purchased a lot by taking out a home equity loan.
With protective order, I let him stay in the house & I moved into a rental, as an effort not to escalate the situation. Big mistake --- he has disposed of all of my clothes/shoes & urinated on my portrait!
1. While we are separated & he's in the house, am I responsible for half the mortgage payments & half the home equity loan payments?
2. Do I have any recourse regarding the destruction of my personal property?

 

[JustAPal00]

1. Yes you are. The bank wants there money, and doesn't care who pays.

2. Call the police, you will have to prove it which might be tough.

 

[LdiJ]

1. Yes you are. The bank wants there money, and doesn't care who pays.

2. Call the police, you will have to prove it which might be tough.

I am going to disagree with both of those answers.

Yes, she is equally responsible for the mortgage and home equity loan (as far as the creditors are concerned) as she is listed on both. However, in a family law situation the person with possession of the home generally is required to make the mortgage payments.

The police are not going to do anything about the damage to her personal property....not when it was inside the home which the husband had possession of. She might be able to get some compensation in the property settlement, but that's all.

 

[JustAPal00]

I am going to disagree with both of those answers.

Yes, she is equally responsible for the mortgage and home equity loan (as far as the creditors are concerned) as she is listed on both. However, in a family law situation the person with possession of the home generally is required to make the mortgage payments.

The police are not going to do anything about the damage to her personal property....not when it was inside the home which the husband had possession of. She might be able to get some compensation in the property settlement, but that's all.

When my ex quit making the mortgage payments on our home that she was living in, It showed on my credit. I couldn't buy a house because the foreclosure was on my credit. If the OP goes to court and a judge orders the EX to pay, she can probably take possession if he doesn't, until then she's kind of at his mercy.

 

[LdiJ]

When my ex quit making the mortgage payments on our home that she was living in, It showed on my credit. I couldn't buy a house because the foreclosure was on my credit. If the OP goes to court and a judge orders the EX to pay, she can probably take possession if he doesn't, until then she's kind of at his mercy.

I don't disagree with that at all....however that wasn't the question she asked.

 

[Ohiogal]

I am going to disagree with both of those answers.

Yes, she is equally responsible for the mortgage and home equity loan (as far as the creditors are concerned) as she is listed on both. However, in a family law situation the person with possession of the home generally is required to make the mortgage payments.

The police are not going to do anything about the damage to her personal property....not when it was inside the home which the husband had possession of. She might be able to get some compensation in the property settlement, but that's all.

And I am going to disagree with both your answers and also both of the original posters.
She is not equally responsible as in 50/50. She is completely responsible for the mortgage if her name is on it. Doesn't matter if someone else's name is also on the mortgage. If he doesn't pay it she has to pay the whole thing. Not just half. And the person in possession is NOT always required to make the mortgage payments. Sometimes. And sometimes the court states that each person is responsible for the debts in their name.

The police may do something about the destruction of her property. She should file a report. And she may get compensation in the property settlement -- provided she can prove what was destroyed. And the portrait -- was it HER property or a gift to her husband? It is not necessarily personal property.

 

[LdiJ]

And I am going to disagree with both your answers and also both of the original posters.
She is not equally responsible as in 50/50. She is completely responsible for the mortgage if her name is on it. Doesn't matter if someone else's name is also on the mortgage. If he doesn't pay it she has to pay the whole thing. Not just half. And the person in possession is NOT always required to make the mortgage payments. Sometimes. And sometimes the court states that each person is responsible for the debts in their name.

I did not state 50/50....I stated equally responsible....as in they are both responsible for the mortgage. Equally is the appropriate term in this context. Neither of them are completely responsible for the mortgage because it is a joint debt. However, their equal responsibility may cause one of them to get stuck with the entire payment in any one given month.

Also, please note that I used the term "generally"...not always.

The police may do something about the destruction of her property. She should file a report. And she may get compensation in the property settlement -- provided she can prove what was destroyed. And the portrait -- was it HER property or a gift to her husband? It is not necessarily personal property.

 

[Ohiogal]

I did not state 50/50....I stated equally responsible....as in they are both responsible for the mortgage. Equally is the appropriate term in this context. Neither of them are completely responsible for the mortgage because it is a joint debt. However, their equal responsibility may cause one of them to get stuck with the entire payment in any one given month.

Also, please note that I used the term "generally"...not always.

Wrong. They are EACH completely responsible for the mortgage. The mortgage -- unless it changes the terms -- requires each party to be jointly and severally liable for the debt of the mortgage. The court may make them partially responsible but the creditor will NOT.

 

[griffin]

missing personal property

The portrait was mine prior to meeting my STBX.
Currently the only evidence I have is the trash truck driver stating there was a significant increase in extra trash on a particular day --- ie. many extra bags placed next to our can. I also have deputies that noted the clothing when I went in the first day to retrieve a few items and that it wasn't there when I finally got back in 6 weeks later.
Also, I can attempt to check DNA on the dried urine, but is it worth the $750 fee?

 

[JustAPal00]

I don't disagree with that at all....however that wasn't the question she asked.

You're right, I was responding to your coment that she wasn't responsible for her half of the payment. She just seperated from her ex, and until the courts rule that he has to pay the whole thing, if he is only paying half now, she better make up the other half! And if the court says he has to pay the whole thing and he doesn't, she better make up the other half until the court can solve the problem!

 

[JustAPal00]

And I am going to disagree with both your answers and also both of the original posters.
She is not equally responsible as in 50/50. She is completely responsible for the mortgage if her name is on it.

That's what I said! If he is only making half the payment, she better make the other half. "Yes you are. The bank wants there money, and doesn't care who pays."