Custody/Visitation

[radtech]

I seriously need any advice if you can help. My bf had a child with his ex wife and after raising the child for almost 4 years finds out that she is not his. He still wants to be able to see her but the ex is not being cooperative. Is there anything that can be done?

 

[CJane]

Did your BF establish paternity by AOP or DNA test?
Does your BF pay child support by court order?
Are there any court orders for visitation/custody?
How does he know the child isn't his?

 

[radtech]

custody/visitation

He took a DNA test, that her attorney ordered. They also did one one the other guy,that turned out to be the father.

He was not ordered to pay child support

There are no orders for custody or visitation

The DNA test showed that the man she cheated on him with is the father.

 

[CJane]

Your BF has no standing to sue for visitation or custody at this point. If the other man has been legally determined to be the father - and that's certainly what it sounds like - your BF is out of luck.

The answer might be different if your BF had signed an affidavit of paternity when the child was born... but then I suspect he'd be wanting to know how to make sure he could see the kid but not pay support.

Chalk this up to a lesson about the importance of having children while married... or at least availing himself of a DNA test when the kid is born... and move on.

 

[radtech]

custody/visitation

ok, well thanks for your help. I know that he was origionally on the birth certificate, so I wasn't sure if anything could be done. I heard that in the state of texas it was illegal to remove the father from it without his consent. We were just hoping that maybe there was something that we could do. Afterall, he loves this child as his own and is having a hard time not getting to see her right now.

 

[Silverplum]

ok, well thanks for your help. I know that he was origionally on the birth certificate, so I wasn't sure if anything could be done. I heard that in the state of texas it was illegal to remove the father from it without his consent. We were just hoping that maybe there was something that we could do. Afterall, he loves this child as his own and is having a hard time not getting to see her right now.

He really should consult with a local family law attorney, and bring every bit of paperwork he has, including the original birth certificate, and find out if there are any TX loopholes that we do not know. Yes, attorneys cost $$, but think of them like plumbers: you really can afford one when water is spurting up out of the toilet like a fireplug come undone.

He could also research TX paternity law -- there's a ton of info right on this site, and on many others.

I can say with certainty that if he doesn't act ASAP, any chance he might have will be gone.

 

[CJane]

ok, well thanks for your help. I know that he was origionally on the birth certificate, so I wasn't sure if anything could be done. I heard that in the state of texas it was illegal to remove the father from it without his consent. We were just hoping that maybe there was something that we could do. Afterall, he loves this child as his own and is having a hard time not getting to see her right now.

Ok. Waitaminute... I totally missed that she's his ex WIFE. Was the child born while they were married?

Because if they were married at the time of the birth (or the child was born w/in 300 days of the divorce being final) he's the legal father of the child.

Which makes me wonder why there's no order for custody/visitation/child support because all of that should have been included in the divorce.

 

[radtech]

custody/visitation

The child was born before they got married, i am pretty sure, no actually she was 4 months pregnant. But he was listed as the father on the birth certificate

 

[Silverplum]

The child was born before they got married, i am pretty sure, no actually she was 4 months pregnant. But he was listed as the father on the birth certificate

Hon, this is not a slam against you -- BUT you are too imprecise for us to give solid info. It REALLY REALLY MATTERS in the law whether or not the child was born during a marriage, or outside of it. It also really matters whether or not your bf has legally established paternity according to TX law.

So please put your bf online, or send him to an attorney. Because right now we are just going around in imprecise wiggly circles.

 

[radtech]

custody/visitation

Sorry to have upset you. They married when she was 4 months pregnant. So yes, the child was BORN while they were married. I just wanted some advice, I am sorry to have wasted your time.

 

[CJane]

Sorry to have upset you. They married when she was 4 months pregnant. So yes, the child was BORN while they were married. I just wanted some advice, I am sorry to have wasted your time.

If you just want some advice, great. You've gotten it.

But if you want GOOD advice or LEGALLY ACCURATE advice, it MATTERS.

If they were married when the child was BORN, he's legally the father of the child. This 'other man' will have to file to disestablish paternity and may or may not be successful in his attempt.

However, your BF has NO ORDERS for Child support or custody or visitation and I'm still really confused about how THAT happened when there apparently WAS a child 'of the marriage'.

Your BF needs to come here and answer questions if he wants to know what he can do. You just don't have enough information.

 

[Silverplum]

Sorry to have upset you. They married when she was 4 months pregnant. So yes, the child was BORN while they were married. I just wanted some advice, I am sorry to have wasted your time.

I'm not upset, I'm just trying to wack through to the pertinent facts.

Okay, this is the deal: He IS, or ought to be, the legal father of the child even though he is not the biological father.

Texas law: http://lawdigest.uslegal.com/paternity/general/6706/

§ 160.204. Presumption of Paternity in Context of Marriage

(a) A man is presumed to be the father of a child if:
(1) he is married to the mother of the child and the child is born during the marriage;

(2) he is married to the mother of the child and the child is born before the 301st day after the date the marriage is terminated by death, annulment, declaration of invalidity, or divorce;

(3) he married the mother of the child before the birth of the child in apparent compliance with law, even if the attempted marriage is or could be declared invalid, and the child is born during the invalid marriage or before the 301st day after the date the marriage is terminated by death, annulment, declaration of invalidity, or divorce; or

(4) he married the mother of the child after the birth of the child in apparent compliance with law, regardless of whether the marriage is or could be declared invalid, he voluntarily asserted his paternity of the child, and:
(A) the assertion is in a record filed with the bureau of vital statistics;

(B) he is voluntarily named as the child's father on the child's birth certificate; or

(C) he promised in a record to support the child as his own.

(b) A presumption of paternity established under this section may be rebutted only by an adjudication under Subchapter G.
Amended by Acts 2001, 77th Leg., ch. 821, § 1.01, eff. June 14, 2001.

That site goes on to show Subchapter G, and lots of other law. Have a good look, have bf take a good long read.

Do you know how they managed to get divorced without legally addressing custody, visitation (also called "parenting time"), and child support??

 

[radtech]

custody/visitation

When they got divorced, the did the whole custody thing, his ex was determined to prove that he wasnt the father and did just that. The lawyer that my bf got was a joke. When all was said and done, all my bf wanted was to get to see her. Reguardless of if he is the father or not. COme to find out when he goes into his attorneys office after everything was done he was told to sign papers stating that the DNA test showed him as NOT THE FATHER.... come to find out, that wasn't what that was, it was him signing over his rights. So his lawyer was not truthful with him about what was being signed. So now that is why I believe he has no rights now.

 

[CJane]

When they got divorced, the did the whole custody thing, his ex was determined to prove that he wasnt the father and did just that. The lawyer that my bf got was a joke. When all was said and done, all my bf wanted was to get to see her. Reguardless of if he is the father or not. COme to find out when he goes into his attorneys office after everything was done he was told to sign papers stating that the DNA test showed him as NOT THE FATHER.... come to find out, that wasn't what that was, it was him signing over his rights. So his lawyer was not truthful with him about what was being signed. So now that is why I believe he has no rights now.

That didn't happen. It may be what you were TOLD happened, or what your BF thinks happened, but it isn't what happened.

Tell your BF to get a copy of his divorce decree and anything else he signed at the attorney's office and come here.

You do NOT have the required information. You just don't.

 

[Silverplum]

I. Need. Pudding.

Now.

Chocolate.