Kids visitation to EU country from Ohio

[euliving]

What is the name of your state? OHIO

I am from Ohio and my exwife left me without any real reason. So, we filed an uncontested divorce (well, for me it was begrudgingly) and promised to do a 50/50 custody. For the first 6 years of my kids lives they have been with me more than 50% of the time while my exwife collected benefits from the government as if she had them 100% of the time.

Last year I met a woman from Hungary. She loves the kids and they love her. She cooks for them, makes sure they eat and live healthy, she has very high family values and takes great care of us all. We got married and had a baby together. Now we are living in Hungary together (Although I still have my apartment in the USA). My exwife doesn't approve of my trip here but she agreed to work with me on it.

The problem is, we want the kids to spend summers or the school year here in Hungary. My attorney says it is possible and the court would PROBABLY order them to be allowed to be here with us. My ex wife wants to contest it and her attorney says it is NOT LIKELY they will be ordered to be allowed to come to Hungary. I can't stay in Ohio where there are NO jobs for me. I have little to no chance of a decent job. Only 2 weeks after moving here I am already employed in Hungary! I have other interested employers who want to hire me for more money than I made in the USA.

DOES ANYBODY KNOW WHAT THE CHANCES ARE OF MY WIFE AND I GETTING PERMISSION TO LIVE IN EUROPE WITH THE KIDS 1/2 OF THE YEAR?

I want to point out that we have it much better in Hungary.

* Tons of very close loving family here who will pay a lot of attention to our 2 kids in the USA
* Much healthier food (no hormones in the milk, no transfat, little to no junkfood available)
* Many more things to do in a society which values family over corporations or work
* Social services. We have universal healthcare and many family centric social services.
* Higher quality of living. Almost everybody OWNS their house, only students rent apartments here. No need to own a car. One of the best public trans in the world so much safer transportation here than the USA.
* Much better work environments. We don't have the same exploitation as in the USA.
* Better schools which teach in English, Hungarian, or German. Lessons involve much more language which my kids are interested in.
* More wholesome things for the kids to do here. Eg visit castles, ride the train, play in the yard as opposed to playing video games in the USA all the time.

Thank you for the advice in advanced. We all really appreciate it.

 

[CJane]

I think it's likely that you will get some sort of visitation w/the children in your new country. I am 100% sure you will be paying for the transportation of the children to Hungary and that they will NOT be spending 1/2 of their time there. You will likely become the NCP and pay support in addition to providing plane tickets for the children to visit you and your new wife.

And while the list you provided is great... it's completely legally irrelevant.

 

[LdiJ]

I am going to agree with CJane, if your attorney is telling you that you have a good shot at being able to live in Hungary with the kids, or even getting a true 50/50 situation with the kids splitting their time between the US and Hungary, your attorney is looking to make alot of money off of you.

The bottom line is that the US will retain jurisiction of the children, and that you will NOT get permission to relocate the children to Hungary. You will get visitation in Hungary if you can prove that Hungary will honor the US's jurisdiction of the case, and if you are willing to pay the transportation costs for visitation. That visitation will likely include most or all of the summer, and a week at Christmas or during other holidays if you can afford the transportion. You may be required to post a cash bond to ensure that the children will be returned to the US after each visitation.

You also need to plan to be paying child support. You also need to understand that the only family that your children will have in Hungary is YOU, and any future siblings that might come along.

Just so you understand, I personally feel that its a fantastic experience for children to get a "toe hold" into two countries...to actually experience living in two countries. I am a very big fan of that. I believe that it provides fantastic opportunities to the children.

However....legal reality is that you will NOT get permission to relocate the children to Hungary, nor will you get a true 50/50 schedule. Its simply NOT going to happen. You don't have the elements to allow that.

 

[euliving]

Wow. Thanks for the great replies. I am grateful.

I don't want to "relocate" the kids to Hungary. It's just that I have never been away from them. The most ever was 3 weeks. Here I am doing it again but for even longer. The boys and I have a tight relationship. I quit college for them so I could spend more time with them during their "tender years". Now they are 8 and 6 and we're beginning the process of getting their mom use to the idea of me, the kids stepmom and the kids baby sister living in Hungary (2 boys living here just for summers or winters, whatever their mom chooses).

As for the transportation. I planned to pay for the tickets. We thought we could go from Cleveland to Germany, France, Austria or Italy. It would be cheap. Then my wife and I could pick the kids up at the airport and take the train back to Hungary. The kids would love it and we have friends who would let us stay in these other countries for free.

As for the bond.....Since we -have- to get a 2 way ticket, does that matter?

I know that it is not 50/50. If kids stay for the summers, there are 3 months that I would have to pay support to my exwife to make up the difference. I just wonder if I pay child support, would it go through the child support government system? Doesn't make sense since I would be in Europe and not in the USA. I don't agree with that system and wonder if people in my situation pay the ex directly. The system charges an administration fee which doesn't seem right.

On a side note and also irrelevant to the case, the kids want to come here badly and see the castles and possibly learn another language. My wife is planning a lot of fun things for them here.

 

[Ohiogal]

In Ohio it is mandated that Child Support is paid through CSEA. So yes, you would have to send your checks DIRECTLY to CSEA in Columbus.

 

[stealth2]

As for the bond.....Since we -have- to get a 2 way ticket, does that matter?

Yes, of course it does. Nothing states that you have to put the kids back on the plane, even with a R/T ticket. The point of the bond is, should you not return the kids, you forfeit the money and Mom can use it for her legal fees to get the kids back.

And honestly? I find it a little ludicrous to be crying about how much you miss your boys and how you've never spent time away from them when you CHOSE to move half a world away.

 

[CJane]

I find it a little ludicrous to be crying about how much you miss your boys and how you've never spent time away from them when you CHOSE to move half a world away.

But Stealth... there are no hormones in the milk, and they can see Castles!

 

[stealth2]

But Stealth... there are no hormones in the milk, and they can see Castles!

Oh yeah.

 

[LdiJ]

I know that it is not 50/50. If kids stay for the summers, there are 3 months that I would have to pay support to my exwife to make up the difference. I just wonder if I pay child support, would it go through the child support government system? Doesn't make sense since I would be in Europe and not in the USA. I don't agree with that system and wonder if people in my situation pay the ex directly. The system charges an administration fee which doesn't seem right..

That is absolutely NOT The way that child support works. Yes, you will be getting a credit for your parenting time, but you will be paying child support all year long....and yes, its likely that you will have to pay through the CSE. That is actually to your advantage, because there will be a clear record of the child support paid.

Again, its likely that you will have to prove that Hungary will honor the US's jurisdiction of the case, and may very well have to post a cash bond to ensure that if you don't return the children, that mom has the financial resources to get them back.

I honestly don't understand how you could have made the choice to move that far away from your children, however its a choice that you made, and you have to accept the consequences of the choice. Again, I think visiting Hungary will be a marvelous experience for your children, but that doesn't outweigh the fact that they won't have dad as a regular part of their lives.