Setup for disaster?
What is the name of your state? MS
Ok this is gonna be a little long, but I'm in dire need of some advice.
I'm with my girlfriend of lil over 2 years. We have 2 sons and we rent a place. I work on the road so I'm not home much, and she decides to stay with her family while I"m gone.
In a way I think she is up to something but at the same time I do tend to overreact and am a DEEP thinker.
We cannot afford medical insurance and she gets medicaid and wic for both children. She has worked on and off as a cosmotolegist for the last 2 years. She just recently went back to work and put the kids in daycare. Being that she is new to the shop, her income so far is not even enough to pay for daycare so she is wanting to file for state help. (Yes I support them all, it's just tough right now) She was told in order to recieve help she has to recieve child support. She wants us to set it up in order to do so. I don't like this idea as I feel it is fraud. But my biggest concerns are what I might be setting myself up for if I agree to pay support through the state. She's also been pushing marriage for quite a while now, especially now.(Haven't had the money for that one either)
I feel like I"m walking into a trap. Whether it be getting screwed in child support or visitation or what not.
Even if she gets support, we'll still be living together. I'm afraid if I don't volunteer for support, 10 years down the road we could split and she could get me for back pay even though I support us. Even that my visitation rights would come into effect with all this.
On the other hand if I do volunteer, some odd years down the road she could split and still go to court and ask for backpay(say if I get a raise or something) and I'd be left to prove I paid the bills and supported them the entire time. Kinda like I'd pay support, the bills and everything(what the government doesn't help us out on) and then get screwed for more money dating back for the past so many years.
Am I making any sense here?
I feel the marriage could just be another part of the "plan" I've personally know family members and friends who have been screwed in a similar situation, but they're of no help.
Income tax**************..she wants to claim the kids and get lots of money back and me claim only myself and I"d be screwed with the IRS. She doesn't see it that way.
My boys are my life, I will do everything i can for them and always support them. My biggest concern is visitation. I will not "agree" on any type. I know the courts can and will set it. But I'm a good father and I believe I should see my boys anytime I want as long it's a mutual thing. I know we can do this mutually even if court says I can't see em but 2 days a week, but if the court said that, she'd hold me to it to be a bitty, I "think".
??????
I don't wanna trap myself into paying unfairly either. I really don't know what to do. I've discussed it with her and she says she's not up to anything and would never keep the kids from me. But what are words worth nowadays?
Please help.
What is the name of your state? MS
Ok this is gonna be a little long, but I'm in dire need of some advice.
I'm with my girlfriend of lil over 2 years. We have 2 sons and we rent a place. I work on the road so I'm not home much, and she decides to stay with her family while I"m gone.
In a way I think she is up to something but at the same time I do tend to overreact and am a DEEP thinker.
We cannot afford medical insurance and she gets medicaid and wic for both children. She has worked on and off as a cosmotolegist for the last 2 years. She just recently went back to work and put the kids in daycare. Being that she is new to the shop, her income so far is not even enough to pay for daycare so she is wanting to file for state help. (Yes I support them all, it's just tough right now) She was told in order to recieve help she has to recieve child support. She wants us to set it up in order to do so. I don't like this idea as I feel it is fraud. But my biggest concerns are what I might be setting myself up for if I agree to pay support through the state. She's also been pushing marriage for quite a while now, especially now.(Haven't had the money for that one either)
I feel like I"m walking into a trap. Whether it be getting screwed in child support or visitation or what not.
Even if she gets support, we'll still be living together. I'm afraid if I don't volunteer for support, 10 years down the road we could split and she could get me for back pay even though I support us. Even that my visitation rights would come into effect with all this.
On the other hand if I do volunteer, some odd years down the road she could split and still go to court and ask for backpay(say if I get a raise or something) and I'd be left to prove I paid the bills and supported them the entire time. Kinda like I'd pay support, the bills and everything(what the government doesn't help us out on) and then get screwed for more money dating back for the past so many years.
Am I making any sense here?
I feel the marriage could just be another part of the "plan" I've personally know family members and friends who have been screwed in a similar situation, but they're of no help.
Income tax**************..she wants to claim the kids and get lots of money back and me claim only myself and I"d be screwed with the IRS. She doesn't see it that way.
My boys are my life, I will do everything i can for them and always support them. My biggest concern is visitation. I will not "agree" on any type. I know the courts can and will set it. But I'm a good father and I believe I should see my boys anytime I want as long it's a mutual thing. I know we can do this mutually even if court says I can't see em but 2 days a week, but if the court said that, she'd hold me to it to be a bitty, I "think".
??????
I don't wanna trap myself into paying unfairly either. I really don't know what to do. I've discussed it with her and she says she's not up to anything and would never keep the kids from me. But what are words worth nowadays?
Please help.
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