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stepmother rights?

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theshins2008

Junior Member
But remember--having no legal authority also means you have no legal obligation. Choosing to help with your step son because of the love and respect you have for him and/or his father is a nice thing to do, but it's your choice.

Huzzah! I learned something new. Very good point! :)
 


michelecable196

Junior Member
stepmother rights

I will thank him. I too served for a year in 2005.
Relationship with mother is not really amicable, only when it serves her to be. Now that I have moved down to NC from VA on a permanent basis, her being a dotting (sp) mother has kicked in for the time-being.
I have sent an email to the school cc'ing my husband so that they will at least provide updates on his son.

Thank you
 

>Charlotte<

Lurker
Just wanted to say welcome to NC. I guess you're in Fayetteville? Just in time for humidity season. Also known as "Oh my God, what have I done??"
 

Rd.kll

Junior Member
Been reading the reply and Iam curious when the child started school you filled out a form in the begining of the school year that or states who can come to the school and see the child (ie. The people the school calls for an emergency or fight etc... .) . On that form if your husband states you as his go to person when he is out of town and there should be no problem . You need the school to know that your husband say its OK the mother does have a say but , not as much as people are telling you here .I would ask your attorney to write out somthing giving you some more rights. I live in CA. an the laws are a bit different from most states but that is what I did,and latter recived full custody but that has nothing to do with this . Ask the school if you are listed on that paper work .
 

Suzz

Member
I second the suggestion to talk to Mom and nicely ask her if you may sit in to observe only ... to take notes for Dad so that he isn't totally out of the loop while he's away. All she can do is say no ... just keep it light and don't get offended if she says no. Continue to be pleasent and cooperate with her as much as you can in matters dealing with your SS. In the end Dad and Son are the ones who will ultimately benefit or suffer the effects of these interactions while Dad is away. ( I hope that makes sense, it does in my head, but...)

Just wanted to say welcome to NC. I guess you're in Fayetteville? Just in time for humidity season. Also known as "Oh my God, what have I done??"
I second the welcome :)
LOL ... it isn't that bad down here (ok yeah right, and I'm a native) but at least from Oct. to April, if you don't like the weather give it a few hrs and it will change .. sometimes drastically!

Don't forget, CLT, in NC it could be Havelock, Goldsboro, Jacksonville, Fayetteville, or one of the umpteen dozen Natl. Guard Units spread all over ... we bleed camo in this state I think :) And we appreciate every blessed (2 syllables) one of them :)
 

Silverplum

Senior Member
:eek: You are REALLY wrong on a legal basis.
Please stop giving legally incorrect advice.

Been reading the reply and Iam curious when the child started school you filled out a form in the begining of the school year that or states who can come to the school and see the child (ie. The people the school calls for an emergency or fight etc... .) . On that form if your husband states you as his go to person when he is out of town and there should be no problem . You need the school to know that your husband say its OK the mother does have a say but , not as much as people are telling you here .I would ask your attorney to write out somthing giving you some more rights. I live in CA. an the laws are a bit different from most states but that is what I did,and latter recived full custody but that has nothing to do with this . Ask the school if you are listed on that paper work .
 

Zephyr

Senior Member
Been reading the reply and Iam curious when the child started school you filled out a form in the begining of the school year that or states who can come to the school and see the child (ie. The people the school calls for an emergency or fight etc... .) . On that form if your husband states you as his go to person when he is out of town and there should be no problem . You need the school to know that your husband say its OK the mother does have a say but , not as much as people are telling you here .I would ask your attorney to write out somthing giving you some more rights. I live in CA. an the laws are a bit different from most states but that is what I did,and latter recived full custody but that has nothing to do with this . Ask the school if you are listed on that paper work .
yeah, that's it.....cause attorney's just go around handing out rights...:rolleyes:
 

Zephyr

Senior Member
SO SORRY BUT WHAT I SAID IS NOT WRONG I DID JUST WHAT I SAID AND IT WORKED JUST FINE . THE ADVICE WAS NOT INCORRECT.
please link the legal statute that was used for your LAWYER to give you rights?


can anyone else hear crickets?
 

StampGirl

Senior Member
Been reading the reply and Iam curious when the child started school you filled out a form in the begining of the school year that or states who can come to the school and see the child (ie. The people the school calls for an emergency or fight etc... .) . On that form if your husband states you as his go to person when he is out of town and there should be no problem . You need the school to know that your husband say its OK the mother does have a say but , not as much as people are telling you here .I would ask your attorney to write out somthing giving you some more rights. I live in CA. an the laws are a bit different from most states but that is what I did,and latter recived full custody but that has nothing to do with this . Ask the school if you are listed on that paper work .
Ummm excuse me, but the MOM has MANY MORE RIGHTS THAN ANY STEP-PARENT.

The school ONLY needs to deal with MOM or DAD. Step's have NO legal rights AT ALL. ESP in California. Trust me. They can't stand over-stepping step-parents.

The only place on the school paperwork for a step-parent is waaaaaaay at the bottom as an emergency contact. My Ex got a ripe lesson in this as he tried to list his Wifey as the FIRST contact after me and him. NOPE. She goes rigth at the bottom after the grand-parents (whom we live with).
 

Silverplum

Senior Member
SO SORRY BUT WHAT I SAID IS NOT WRONG I DID JUST WHAT I SAID AND IT WORKED JUST FINE . THE ADVICE WAS NOT INCORRECT.
We don't appreciate ALL CAPS postings here. :rolleyes: It's like YELLING. So stop that, too.

And as far as your *advice,* I was being pleasant for your first time. If you keep posting legally incorrect advice -- and refuse to provide proof of your "assertions" -- we will begin to report you to Admin, and you will be dealt with by the Forum Administrators.
 

michelecable196

Junior Member
stepmother rights

As I said. I have been enlightened and I appreciate the advice. I will say that I am not, nor have I been an overbearing step-parent. Simply wanted to be at the meeting because my husband was unable to do so. I raised 3 boys of my own and believe in mother/father contact. This mother is not so inclined. Again, between the mom and dad. I do not over-step. When the son is here for the week, we get along fine. I make sure the son keeps his mother informed when things/plans change. Common courtesy on my part, not reciprocal. Since I have never been a stepmother, I didn't know what the rights were. Again, would have been happy to observe and take notes. Did not need to interject (sp.) or put in my 2 cents. That will not be in the case. Relationship with step son will have to start again when the dad returns home. I live in Lexington, NC
 

Ohiogal

Queen Bee
SO SORRY BUT WHAT I SAID IS NOT WRONG I DID JUST WHAT I SAID AND IT WORKED JUST FINE . THE ADVICE WAS NOT INCORRECT.
LEGALLY you are very wrong. The school did NOT have to deal with you and the LEGAL parent could have gotten you slapped with a restraining order.
 

LdiJ

Senior Member
Been reading the reply and Iam curious when the child started school you filled out a form in the begining of the school year that or states who can come to the school and see the child (ie. The people the school calls for an emergency or fight etc... .) . On that form if your husband states you as his go to person when he is out of town and there should be no problem . You need the school to know that your husband say its OK the mother does have a say but , not as much as people are telling you here .I would ask your attorney to write out somthing giving you some more rights. I live in CA. an the laws are a bit different from most states but that is what I did,and latter recived full custody but that has nothing to do with this . Ask the school if you are listed on that paper work .
Its really NOT that simple...even in CA.

Edit to add: I should have read further before I responded....my response was unnecessary.
 
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