stepmother rights?

[CLBKLCDTB]

Originally Posted by bumpkin0684
If the husband signs a release form at the school, the mother cannot stop you from meeting with school officals. So you could have him contact the school via e-mail and have him inform the school that thye are to contact you in his absence about any problems and any meetings that are needed. If mother has a problem with it, you can request seperate meetings. By law the school has to agree to the terms the father sets. That is what happened in my experiences. So good luck. Maybe this is some hope for you. Since people seem to be very mean to people even if they are jsut asking for alittle bit of help.

Actually the school has to go by the stipulated court order set by the judge.

 

[tanja53]

Your exactly right, However....*Legaly* it would be acceptable. More than lets say, a spouse of a NCP actually going to the meeting..

As was said above. Let mom go to the meeting and send dad paperwork to keep him up to speed on what is going on with his child.

Is seems that the father and the mother dont have a good friendly communication. So the chances of her sending him the paperwork might not be so good.
I think that the stepmother should be able to go in her husbands absents since he wants that.

 

[TinkerBelleLuvr]

Is seems that the father and the mother dont have a good friendly communication. So the chances of her sending him the paperwork might not be so good.
I think that the stepmother should be able to go in her husbands absents since he wants that.

Stepparents are LEGAL strangers. If mom doesn't want her there, that's it.

Please review post #41 that has the FERPA law.

 

[CLBKLCDTB]

Is seems that the father and the mother dont have a good friendly communication. So the chances of her sending him the paperwork might not be so good.
I think that the stepmother should be able to go in her husbands absents since he wants that.

The school can mail the update to the childs father.

The step mother needs to step back and let mom and dad parent the child.

If dad chooses not to be, (or even cant be due to being in Iraq) he can not send his new female in his place. It doesn't work like that.

 

[tanja53]

The school can mail the update to the childs father.

The step mother needs to step back and let mom and dad parent the child.

If dad chooses not to be, (or even cant be due to being in Iraq) he can not send his new female in his place. It doesn't work like that.

After what I have heard it is not that easy to get mail through to Irak.
At least not that fast.
I think they are all adults and should get along and work together. That would be in the best intrest for the child.
In my family there are custodial parents and step parents. And we all help each other. And we all get along without a problem.
I dont mind that my ex new partner helps out with my kids. I think she is great for wanting that.

 

[ErinGoBragh]

After what I have heard it is not that easy to get mail through to Irak.
At least not that fast.
I think they are all adults and should get along and work together. That would be in the best intrest for the child.
In my family there are custodial parents and step parents. And we all help each other. And we all get along without a problem.
I dont mind that my ex new partner helps out with my kids. I think she is great for wanting that.

It takes two weeks at the most, usually 7-10 days, for mail to get to Iraq.

It's great you feel that way, but the bottom line is that if mom doesn't want stepmom there stepmom cannot be there.

There are no 3 parent families in the eyes of the law.

 

[tanja53]

It takes two weeks ma, usually 7-10 days, for mail to get to Iraq.

It's great you feel that way, but the bottom line is that if mom doesn't want stepmom there stepmom cannot be there.

There are no 3 parent families in the eyes of the law.

I have learnt that from reading everybodys threads.
And I do think ii is very sad.Kids can feel then parents dont get along.
My kids have always felt good about their parents choice to include our new partners.
Even if me and my ex makes the final decision. We let the step parents be a part of the family.
Plus we do have family events so the kids dont have to choose.

 

[CLBKLCDTB]

After what I have heard it is not that easy to get mail through to Irak.
At least not that fast.
I think they are all adults and should get along and work together. That would be in the best intrest for the child.
In my family there are custodial parents and step parents. And we all help each other. And we all get along without a problem.
I dont mind that my ex new partner helps out with my kids. I think she is great for wanting that.

It is my obligation to get along and work with my ex tward what is best for our child.

This obligation does not include who he shares his bed with or who he decides should be his new wife.

As long as she is nice to our son while he is around her that is all I would want or expect from her.

Everything and anything else, with reguard to our son, is up to my ex and myself.

 

[Ohiogal]

Somebody called rdkll wrote the same thing yesterday. And the forum didnt like what he wrote.
I do agree with both of you.

That is nice MissIsis but it still is not LEGALLY correct.

 

[tanja53]

It is my obligation to get along and work with my ex tward what is best for our child.

This obligation does not include who he shares his bed with or who he decides should be his new wife.

As long as she is nice to our son while he is around her that is all I would want or expect from her.

Everything and anything else, with reguard to our son, is up to my ex and myself.

Life is way to short for not getting along in the family.
Our kids are now a bit older. And I am referring to permanent partners not anything else.
Each family make there own choices. Just keep in mind that the kids will one day be an adult with a good memory.
I know from own experience.

 

[CLBKLCDTB]

Life is way to short for not getting along in the family.
Our kids are now a bit older. And I am referring to permanent partners not anything else.
Each family make there own choices. Just keep in mind that the kids will one day be an adult with a good memory.
I know from own experience.

hahaha...I was supposed to be the "permanent partner" Your right kids do have good memories and my daughter will never forget what my ex did to hurt me so deeply. She was 15 and saw and heard it all.


I made a choice to marry him. Thinking it was right.
It was the wrong choice for my daughter and myself. Now in addition I have a 5 yr old boy to consider. I will not be getting married. No Man will ever live in my home. I can date and have friends, however I will never make the mistake of trusting anyone with my children ever again.

He has made a choice for his life partner....did I mrntion she will be #3? That has noting to do with our son except she will be dads wife and a friend to him. Nothing more.

I share joint custody with my ex....not my ex and "life partner" #3.

One more thing...I can smile and be very nice. I can get along fine, as long as she knows her place. That place is not mothering our son. If she wantxs to be a mom....she can have her own child

I know this post sounds angry. Perhaps it is. Perhaps I am not past the hurt my ex caused to my daughter (not his) and myself. I had to choose between my marriage and our son having his mother and father together under the same roof.....or my daughters well being. I choose to divorce my husband over the issue.

Wasn't easy and I guess It bothers me that he can move on to a new"life partner" so easy.

Since I now have a wonderful son, I am tied to this man for the rest of my life. Just because he chooses a new female does not cancel out our parenting plan...which does not include step parents.

 

[TinkerBelleLuvr]

Much is dependent on the role that the new step takes. If they try to be a a help-mate to their spouse, but not take over parenting a child, chances are that it will work. There are a number of parents on this forum who get along well with all the respective X's and their spouses. It depends on how much they have gotten past their anger and what they choose to focus their energy on.

If the mom takes the CP role to heart in which she is to faciliate a relationship with the child and his/her father, then she may accept a step who will help get information to the dad. But, if the mom feels threatened in her role as mom, then chances are that it won't work.

It all depends ...

 

[mommyof4]

I have learnt that from reading everybodys threads.

Apparently, you need to keep studying. LEARNT???? WTH????

Oh...and you and your 'permy partner' are still dead wrong, legally. What you think and/or feel has nothing in common with the legally correct answers.

 

[tanja53]

Much is dependent on the role that the new step takes. If they try to be a a help-mate to their spouse, but not take over parenting a child, chances are that it will work. There are a number of parents on this forum who get along well with all the respective X's and their spouses. It depends on how much they have gotten past their anger and what they choose to focus their energy on.

If the mom takes the CP role to heart in which she is to faciliate a relationship with the child and his/her father, then she may accept a step who will help get information to the dad. But, if the mom feels threatened in her role as mom, then chances are that it won't work.

It all depends ...

I agree with you. The step parent cant take over for a good parent. The step parent should just be there as an extra parent.
I have never/ever felt threaten by my ex new partner.. And she is even 16 years younger than me.
We had been divorced for almost 10 years before she came into his life.
They have a little boy now. So it is a big family.And I do like her. Not always agreeing with her. But respecting her for what she is and she is nice and a good mom.
So it works for us and the rest of the mixed family.

 

[tanja53]

hahaha...I was supposed to be the "permanent partner" Your right kids do have good memories and my daughter will never forget what my ex did to hurt me so deeply. She was 15 and saw and heard it all.


I made a choice to marry him. Thinking it was right.
It was the wrong choice for my daughter and myself. Now in addition I have a 5 yr old boy to consider. I will not be getting married. No Man will ever live in my home. I can date and have friends, however I will never make the mistake of trusting anyone with my children ever again.

He has made a choice for his life partner....did I mrntion she will be #3? That has noting to do with our son except she will be dads wife and a friend to him. Nothing more.

I share joint custody with my ex....not my ex and "life partner" #3.

One more thing...I can smile and be very nice. I can get along fine, as long as she knows her place. That place is not mothering our son. If she wantxs to be a mom....she can have her own child

I know this post sounds angry. Perhaps it is. Perhaps I am not past the hurt my ex caused to my daughter (not his) and myself. I had to choose between my marriage and our son having his mother and father together under the same roof.....or my daughters well being. I choose to divorce my husband over the issue.

Wasn't easy and I guess It bothers me that he can move on to a new"life partner" so easy.

Since I now have a wonderful son, I am tied to this man for the rest of my life. Just because he chooses a new female does not cancel out our parenting plan...which does not include step parents.

I am so sorry fr your experience and pain.
Hope that you one day soon the pain will go away.
He must have hurt you really bad.
I can see why you think and feel as you do.
And again kids never forget. They will always have it in the back of their minds.
Hope you feel better.