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New young parent needing advice

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HelSab

Junior Member
What is the name of your state? Texas

Heres what’s going on with me... I’m 4 months pregnant and recently my boyfriend, who is the father of my child, decided to leave me and told me he would rather make a child with someone else than have to deal with me and my child.

So my questions is how can I get full custody of the child when its born? Is it possible to do this before the child is born? I would like full legal and physical custody and child support really isn’t an issue.

A little background on the father as well as myself... I’m mentally stable, I have good job stability even though I’m not working at the moment cause I’m pregnant, I live with my grandparents in a safe, clean, healthy environment, with a good steady income. I don’t do drugs and prior to becoming pregnant I did drink maybe 1 glass of wine or a margarita once a week and plan on not drinking after my child is born. For the father he has been to psychologists before between the ages of 13-~15 because he was suicidal during those years, he has bad job stability he does not keep a job very long and is usually without a job for 1-2 months, he lives with his mother in a smaller 1 bedroom apartment with a study which he uses as his bedroom, he recently developed a drinking problem, drinking 8-12 beers almost every day, and can have a really bad temper.

Any advice and/or help would be wonderful and thank you!What is the name of your state?What is the name of your state?
 


seniorjudge

Senior Member
For the father he has been to psychologists before between the ages of 13-~15 because he was suicidal during those years, he has bad job stability he does not keep a job very long and is usually without a job for 1-2 months, he lives with his mother in a smaller 1 bedroom apartment with a study which he uses as his bedroom, he recently developed a drinking problem, drinking 8-12 beers almost every day, and can have a really bad temper.

Any advice and/or help would be wonderful and thank you!


Did you know this before you dropped your drawers?


So my questions is how can I get full custody of the child when its born? Is it possible to do this before the child is born?

Probably and no.
 

HelSab

Junior Member
I knew his mother put him in "hospitals" not until recently was I informed of just what and why it was done and why she feels he acted that way for her to do that to him.

As long as I have a good chance of being awarded full custody, thats all Im worried about.
 

nextwife

Senior Member
What is the name of your state? Texas

Heres what’s going on with me... I’m 4 months pregnant and recently my boyfriend, who is the father of my child, decided to leave me and told me he would rather make a child with someone else than have to deal with me and my child.

So my questions is how can I get full custody of the child when its born? Is it possible to do this before the child is born? I would like full legal and physical custody and child support really isn’t an issue.

A little background on the father as well as myself... I’m mentally stable, I have good job stability even though I’m not working at the moment cause I’m pregnant, I live with my grandparents in a safe, clean, healthy environment, with a good steady income. I don’t do drugs and prior to becoming pregnant I did drink maybe 1 glass of wine or a margarita once a week and plan on not drinking after my child is born. For the father he has been to psychologists before between the ages of 13-~15 because he was suicidal during those years, he has bad job stability he does not keep a job very long and is usually without a job for 1-2 months, he lives with his mother in a smaller 1 bedroom apartment with a study which he uses as his bedroom, he recently developed a drinking problem, drinking 8-12 beers almost every day, and can have a really bad temper.

Any advice and/or help would be wonderful and thank you!What is the name of your state?What is the name of your state?

A. WHY did you stop working, just because you're pregnant? I Worked DURING my pregnancy, even with having a hyperemesis gravidurim pregnancy, and vomitting all the time. I'd think you'd want to save up some money for baby needs! REmember, you are just as financially responsible for the baby as dad will be (once he's legally established), and you alone are responsible to support you.

B. So, based on daddy's pre-pregnancy scenario, if these were issues for you, why did you engage in at-risk behaviors with him that would allow a pregnancy to occur? You state he left you, not you left him, so these factors would seem to not have appeared relevant to you in your sudden attitude about not wanting dad to co-parent.
 

seniorjudge

Senior Member
I knew his mother put him in "hospitals" not until recently was I informed of just what and why it was done and why she feels he acted that way for her to do that to him.

As long as I have a good chance of being awarded full custody, thats all Im worried about.
he has bad job stability he does not keep a job very long and is usually without a job for 1-2 months, he lives with his mother in a smaller 1 bedroom apartment with a study which he uses as his bedroom, he recently developed a drinking problem, drinking 8-12 beers almost every day, and can have a really bad temper.

You didn't answer about those things.

It's important for your custody case.
 

CourtClerk

Senior Member
What is the name of your state? Texas

Heres what’s going on with me... I’m 4 months pregnant and recently my boyfriend, who is the father of my child, decided to leave me and told me he would rather make a child with someone else than have to deal with me and my child.
He didn't have a committment to you, you didn't have one to him. You can leave when you're ready, so can he. You weren't his wife, you were the next chick he bedded. Nothing more, nothing less. None of this matters in a custody issue. However, what is important to know is that your ex boyfriend doesn't even HAVE a child right now. No one knows if the child is his, he hasn't acknowledged paternity. Right now... this is your child alone.

So my questions is how can I get full custody of the child when its born?
Is your soon to be child an object? Children are not "it"s. You can petition the court for sole custody, but states really are leaning toward joint custody... and if he requests it, he will get it.
Is it possible to do this before the child is born?
You cannot have custody of a child who isn't born yet.
I would like full legal and physical custody and child support really isn’t an issue.
I would like to be 10 pounds lighter. Sometimes we don't get what we want. Since children have the right to be supported by BOTH parents, child support SHOULD be an issue.
A little background on the father as well as myself... I’m mentally stable,
uh huh
I have good job stability even though I’m not working at the moment cause I’m pregnant,
What does your being pregnant have to do with you not working. I worked right through my pregnancy. Lots of people work through their pregnancies. Has pregnancy become a terminal illness? Oh... and since you're not working, who is paying your medical expenses? How are you supporting yourself?
I live with my grandparents in a safe, clean, healthy environment, with a good steady income.
No, you JUST said you are not working... so I'm presuming YOU don't have an income. Although, please correct me if I'm wrong.
I don’t do drugs and prior to becoming pregnant I did drink maybe 1 glass of wine or a margarita once a week and plan on not drinking after my child is born.
Please... I'm on my second teenager - and I'll drink until he turns 18.
For the father he has been to psychologists before between the ages of 13-~15 because he was suicidal during those years, he has bad job stability he does not keep a job very long and is usually without a job for 1-2 months, he lives with his mother in a smaller 1 bedroom apartment with a study which he uses as his bedroom, he recently developed a drinking problem, drinking 8-12 beers almost every day, and can have a really bad temper.
And all of this you found SO endearing that you dropped your drawers and made a baby with him. He lives with his mommy, you live with your grandparents. Neither one of you are self supporting. How does this make you ANY better than he may I ask? People in glass houses....:rolleyes:
Any advice and/or help would be wonderful
Grow up and learn how to properly coparent.
 

CourtClerk

Senior Member
I knew his mother put him in "hospitals" not until recently was I informed of just what and why it was done and why she feels he acted that way for her to do that to him.
You didn't think to ask him about his past and all that jazz before you just up and gave it up? I'm telling you, these young folks need a little lesson in common sense and valuing their bodies. I'm going to sleep with someone I don't know jack about (well, I don't know anything about the IMPORTANT stuff), but I do know he looks good in blue and he's nice to me when he wants some.
As long as I have a good chance of being awarded full custody, thats all Im worried about.
Remember that even with sole custody, the NCP has the right to visitation WITHOUT YOU PRESENT so he can take kiddo to his house, on weekends, weeks at a time sometimes... and with a court order, you can't say anything about it. So don't rest your heart on as long as you have full custody you have nothing to worry about. Although all of this would have been better thought about BEFORE you actually did the do.
 

CJane

Senior Member
Ok, first of all, you're not married. So you automatically have sole custody of the child once it's born.

No, you cannot do anything to make it 'legal' while you're pregnant.

Your BF is not the of this child until he's been declared such by a court or by signing an affidavit of paternity at the hospital.

Your child has the right to be supported by both parents.

Your BF's history is irrelevant. You knew about it before you chose to have a child with him. You thought he was great daddy material until he left you. You'll be expected to abide by that.
 
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