paying off arrears

[faithnlve]

What is the name of your state? vt...I am paying off arrears of child support. (accumulated last year due to hospital and surgery keeping me out of work). I received a settlement (small one) and we want get our first home. My ex is wealthy and has a huge house. I am not wealthy nor is my hubby, but I am torn between getting our family a home or getting my arrears caught up. It would take us forever to ever save up enough down the road to be able to have a down payment. I owe a little over 5000.00, but have been paying my child support and 100.00 extra per month on arrears since back to work and never late. I want to put the money into my savings account, but my hubby said no, because it will be taken for the arrears by my ex or the state. My hubby wants us to have a home for our small kids, but I get criticized by my ex's family to catch up then buy. Im not sure what the right thing to do here is. This is causing problems. Any advice? Faith

 

[LdiJ]

What is the name of your state? vt...I am paying off arrears of child support. (accumulated last year due to hospital and surgery keeping me out of work). I received a settlement (small one) and we want get our first home. My ex is wealthy and has a huge house. I am not wealthy nor is my hubby, but I am torn between getting our family a home or getting my arrears caught up. It would take us forever to ever save up enough down the road to be able to have a down payment. I owe a little over 5000.00, but have been paying my child support and 100.00 extra per month on arrears since back to work and never late. I want to put the money into my savings account, but my hubby said no, because it will be taken for the arrears by my ex or the state. My hubby wants us to have a home for our small kids, but I get criticized by my ex's family to catch up then buy. Im not sure what the right thing to do here is. This is causing problems. Any advice? Faith

Honestly? i would catch up the arrearages first. They impact your credit score so it could be tough to buy a house if your arrearages are not paid off.

 

[Zephyr]

and stop telling your ex's family anything about your financial situation or goals....

 

[faithnlve]

Thank you for such a quick response. That is what I told my dh. But our credit is good, and the arrears is not showing up on my credit report. He wants us to use it for a down payment to get out of the low income project we are in. Have a home for our kids. I thought paying it off would be better, then no problems down the road. My dh says we are paying on it, and our joint tax return refund is "all" given to him to help with arrears. My hubby wants it caught up too, so he doesnt do an injured spouse. What a guy. If I am always on time and paying on the arrears extra per month his good argument is that my other children have a wonderful home life, and our kids deserve one too. If we use the money to pay off arrears no home, no money. Is it true also what he says about the state or ex will take it from my account? I just want to be fair to my family and all my kids. Thanks Faith

 

[faithnlve]

and stop telling your ex's family anything about your financial situation or goals....

They know about the settlement because my ex sister in law works in payroll.

 

[Zephyr]

They know about the settlement because my ex sister in law works in payroll.

where you work? I would be filing a complaint with your company regarding the breach of confidentiality

 

[faithnlve]

where you work? I would be filing a complaint with your company regarding the breach of confidentiality

She told her hubby, and he probably told my ex. My ex sister in law and I are best of friends. But, I do understand what your saying.

 

[LdiJ]

Thank you for such a quick response. That is what I told my dh. But our credit is good, and the arrears is not showing up on my credit report. He wants us to use it for a down payment to get out of the low income project we are in. Have a home for our kids. I thought paying it off would be better, then no problems down the road. My dh says we are paying on it, and our joint tax return refund is "all" given to him to help with arrears. My hubby wants it caught up too, so he doesnt do an injured spouse. What a guy. If I am always on time and paying on the arrears extra per month his good argument is that my other children have a wonderful home life, and our kids deserve one too. If we use the money to pay off arrears no home, no money. Is it true also what he says about the state or ex will take it from my account? I just want to be fair to my family and all my kids. Thanks Faith

I would still use the money to pay off the arrearages, and then keep saving the 100.00 a month towards a down payment on a house, as well as your next few tax returns.

 

[Gracie3787]

What is the name of your state? vt...I am paying off arrears of child support. (accumulated last year due to hospital and surgery keeping me out of work). I received a settlement (small one) and we want get our first home. My ex is wealthy and has a huge house. I am not wealthy nor is my hubby, but I am torn between getting our family a home or getting my arrears caught up. It would take us forever to ever save up enough down the road to be able to have a down payment. I owe a little over 5000.00, but have been paying my child support and 100.00 extra per month on arrears since back to work and never late. I want to put the money into my savings account, but my hubby said no, because it will be taken for the arrears by my ex or the state. My hubby wants us to have a home for our small kids, but I get criticized by my ex's family to catch up then buy. Im not sure what the right thing to do here is. This is causing problems. Any advice? Faith

This is one of those situations where only you can decide what to do, since you are already paying on the arrears.

Before deciding though, you should ask yourself a few questions:

1. Is interest being added to the arrears balance?
If it is, it would be a huge benefit to you to pay off the arrears.

2. Are you willing to accept the real possibilty that a lien will be placed against the property you buy, if arrears are still owed?

3. Has the CSE agency already placed the arrears on your credit report?
If they have, you might not be able to qualify for a loan and would need to clear your credit record by paying the arrears.

 

[MrsK]

If it were me, I'd buy the house. You have time to pay off the arrears.

 

[Graycat]

I would buy the house also. You can claim the mortgage interest and property taxes on your tax return therefor getting a larger refund which go towards the arrears. It is very generous of your husband not to claim injured spouse. This will help you catch up very quickly.
You will also be building equity for yourself. Being a homeowner will benefit ALL of your children.

 

[wileybunch]

You can claim the mortgage interest and property taxes on your tax return therefor getting a larger refund which go towards the arrears.

Taxpayers only get refunds when what they pay in during the year is more than the tax owed. So you have no way of knowing if she would get a refund, let alone a larger one.

 

[Graycat]

Wileybunch, you are correct. Poster stated that there was no injured spouse filed to help catch up on the arrears faster. That only works when there is a refund.
I still think buying the house is a good financial move and will benefit the whole family.

 

[nextwife]

The difference in what she'd PAY now vs maybe a couple years from now for the house is likely MORE than the total arrearage. Buy now. There won't be a better market for 50 years.

 

[CourtClerk]

Pay your current bills before you generate a new one. That means, pay the arrearage. You OWE this man that money for taking care of YOUR kids while (for whatever reason) you didn't.

his good argument is that my other children have a wonderful home life, and our kids deserve one too.

That's not a good argument. You have an obligation to your existing kids before you make other ones. Hate to say it, but that sometimes means that the youngers ones have to come behind the older ones if you chose to have some here and some there - and before anyone looks sideways at that comment, you'd be saying the same thing if Faith was a man talking about buying a house while he owed his ex money for CS.

If we use the money to pay off arrears no home, no money.

Oh well. It's like that sometimes. We can't always have what we can't afford.

Is it true also what he says about the state or ex will take it from my account?

If it's there and they find it, it'll be gone. Go find and read that thread about the man who opened an estate account and owes arrearages (and is paying it off). Now he has to go and fight with CSE because the money actually ISN'T his, but money to probate his father's estate.

I just want to be fair to my family and all my kids.

Then in all fairness, pay your first family and your first set of kids what you owe them. Doesn't matter that their father is wealthy. Good for him. He's very fortunate, but that doesn't negate your responsibility.