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Florida Custody Question

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Adaly07

Junior Member
What is the name of your state? Florida

Hi
this is just a general question, we actually have an apointment with a laywer on wednesday but we are so frustrated we need to vent and maybe get some ideas.
MY Husband has joint custody of his children, we have the children from thursday morning until sunday evening, AND we pay child support and pay for thier insurance, thier mother has them from sunday evening until thursday morning,
recently the mother has started calling and harrasing us over really stupid things, for instance, the 7 yr old daughter needs counseling, shes having a very hard time with her parents divorce and actually mourns thier being together to the point she has started fabricating stories and going home telling her mom things that arent happening knowing her mom will calla nd jump all over her dad, anyway im getting away from myself,,,,,,,,,so the moms new husband has really good insurance for the kids and its in the divorce agreement that whoever has insurance provides for it but the father pays for it, so we pay for 100% of thier insurance every week plus 50% of the co-pay, thats also in the divorce papers that the parents split any doctor bills 50/50. so when the kids got insurance we started pushing the issue of counseling , the mom insisted SHE wuld find a counselor, so once a week we called her and asked and shed say yeah i have metings to interview them , well 10 weeks into the searching for a counselor things are still bad for the daughter, anyway finally an ultimatum was issued to the mother, give the father the insurance info so he can find a counselor or else hes going to just take them and then take the 50% of the bill out of her child support, which is allowed in the divorce papers, so miraculously she comes up with a counselor, shes ben known to take her other kid out of counseling when the finger was being pointed at her so we made sure the courts and counselors know this, anyway the kids LOVE the counselor, they have ben 5 times now, and the mom has pulled some pretty juvenille stuff in front of the counselor, we have gotten a good report from the counselor saying we are doing a good job the kids are happy at our home, and not to mention the fact that his kids and my kids get along amazingly well, anyway the counselor made a comment that the mom was dishonest in something she had done and now because the finger is being pointed at her, shes freaking out and has cancelled the kids insurance and left nasty vice mails saying that they cnt go anymore, well we have news for her, they will be going and everyone is going to pay for it, they like going and they need it, so sicne she cant get to us that way shes started calling several times a day yelling with petty complaints AND not shes insiting that on saturdays when the father works and his his days to have the kids that he drop them off at her house, she does not want me to watch her kids anymore , never mind they are happy here and love me to death, the daughter has issues but we get along, so shes threatening to take us to court which is ok, we hve nothing to worry about, but its still irritating that she can cxall and yell and harrass us and we have to listen to her every time,

so anyway what im getting at is int he state of florida, i would imagine her not allowing him to have the kids on saturday would be an interferance of visitation, the father works evenings and actually has a job that the kids can go to work with him, but he doesnt get home until 10 pm on thursday and friday and he works daytime saturday , so the house schedule we have is since the kids have school on friday and need to be in bed by 8 pm i watch them on thursday so that they can be in bed at a decent time, he takes them with him to work on thursday and i watch them every other saturday, he takes them to work every other saturday , and they are with me from 8 am until 3 pm and they like spending time with thier friends here and thier stepbrother, and she doesnt want me watching the kids anymore, we think shes jealous, not sure so we dont want to accuse, but shes also demanding we bring them to her n saturdays and then pick them up when the father gets off work, whatever, thats definatly not going to happen, i refuse to cater to her anymore, also her husband watches the kids when we drop them off on sunday and he watches them mon , tues and wed from the time they get home until bedtime because she works nights also, and doesnt get home until 10 but thats ok, she says her husband can watch them, shes also not allowing me into family counseling, even though im part of ta family and a majority of the issues happen at our house because of the mother,

anyway im not looking for good solid legal advice unless someone on here is a laywer and can tell me for sure, but pointing me in the right direction would definatly help

thank you
 


CourtClerk

Senior Member
I am not reading blogs this week.... sorry.

Big blocks of words are too hard to read. You need some white space and to get rid of any information that isn't completely necessary. We don't do venting sessions here.
 

Ohiogal

Queen Bee
Start with reading the sticky....

What is the name of your state? Florida

Hi
this is just a general question, we actually have an apointment with a laywer on wednesday but we are so frustrated we need to vent and maybe get some ideas.
MY Husband has joint custody of his children, we have the children from thursday morning until sunday evening, AND we pay child support and pay for thier insurance, thier mother has them from sunday evening until thursday morning,
Actually legally you are wrong. WE do not pay child support and for their insurance. WE do not have an appointment with a lawyer on Wedesdany. WE are not venting. Where is dad? Dad is the legal party involved.

so the moms new husband has really good insurance for the kids and its in the divorce agreement that whoever has insurance provides for it but the father pays for it, so we pay for 100% of thier insurance every week plus 50% of the co-pay, thats also in the divorce papers that the parents split any doctor bills 50/50.
Okay.

so when the kids got insurance we started pushing the issue of counseling ,
YOU are overstepping. YOU have no right to push mom to get counseling for her daughter. YOU should confine your pushing only to your husband.

the mom insisted SHE wuld find a counselor, so once a week we called her and asked
WE should not be calling. Dad should be having this conversation not you.

and shed say yeah i have metings to interview them , well 10 weeks into the searching for a counselor things are still bad for the daughter, anyway finally an ultimatum was issued to the mother, give the father the insurance info so he can find a counselor or else hes going to just take them and then take the 50% of the bill out of her child support, which is allowed in the divorce papers,
Please quote the child support section that allows dad to unilaterally change the amount he is paying in child support.
we have gotten a good report from the counselor saying we are doing a good job the kids are happy at our home, and not to mention the fact that his kids and my kids get along amazingly well, anyway the counselor made a comment that the mom was dishonest in something she had done and now because the finger is being pointed at her, shes freaking out and has cancelled the kids insurance and left nasty vice mails saying that they cnt go anymore, well we have news for her, they will be going and everyone is going to pay for it,
Snipped some stuff but WE cannot get a good report from the counselor and WE do not have news for mom. Dad may have news and the court may have news.

they like going and they need it, so sicne she cant get to us that way shes started calling several times a day yelling with petty complaints
YOU need to step back.

AND not shes insiting that on saturdays when the father works and his his days to have the kids that he drop them off at her house, she does not want me to watch her kids anymore , never mind they are happy here and love me to death, the daughter has issues but we get along, so shes threatening to take us to court which is ok, we hve nothing to worry about, but its still irritating that she can cxall and yell and harrass us and we have to listen to her every time,
Is there a right of first refusal in the court papers? And who says you have to listen? YOU don't have to have anything to do with her. Dad might have to. But call waiting and voice mail are fabulous inventions.

so anyway what im getting at is int he state of florida, i would imagine her not allowing him to have the kids on saturday would be an interferance of visitation,
Wrong. Not if dad is dropping the children off to her. Then he is agreeing. And truthfully if dad is not home and mom picks the children up then it is NOT an interference with visitation. YOU have no rights to visitation. Dad does. And if dad is not there then mom is not interfering with his visitation. Is it nice of mom? No. Is it contempt? Could be.
the father works evenings and actually has a job that the kids can go to work with him, but he doesnt get home until 10 pm on thursday and friday and he works daytime saturday , so the house schedule we have is since the kids have school on friday and need to be in bed by 8 pm i watch them on thursday so that they can be in bed at a decent time, he takes them with him to work on thursday and i watch them every other saturday, he takes them to work every other saturday , and they are with me from 8 am until 3 pm and they like spending time with thier friends here and thier stepbrother, and she doesnt want me watching the kids anymore,
Depending on the job mom have a right to complain about the situation. Their stepbrother quite frankly doesn't matter. You are nothing more than a glorified babysitter. Mom doesn't have to like you watching the children anymore. She can ask the court for a ROFR.


we think shes jealous,
Again -- WE don't matter. What dad thinks doesn't even matter.

not sure so we dont want to accuse,
You just did.

but shes also demanding we bring them to her n saturdays and then pick them up when the father gets off work, whatever, thats definatly not going to happen, i refuse to cater to her anymore,
Really? If she gets a court order it very well can happen. YOU refuse to cater to her? She is the mother of these children. YOU ARE NOT. You don't have to cater but dad might.


also her husband watches the kids when we drop them off on sunday and he watches them mon , tues and wed from the time they get home until bedtime because she works nights also, and doesnt get home until 10 but thats ok, she says her husband can watch them,
If there is a ROFR it goes both ways.


shes also not allowing me into family counseling, even though im part of ta family and a majority of the issues happen at our house because of the mother,
YOU are NOT family. YOU do not belong in family counseling. The issues happen due to mom? Doesn't matter. Then mom and dad should be in family counseling with the children. NOT you. And NOT stepdad.

anyway im not looking for good solid legal advice unless someone on here is a laywer and can tell me for sure, but pointing me in the right direction would definatly help
I just did tell you. This is a legal advice site. You got legal responses.
 

Silverplum

Senior Member
I am not reading blogs this week.... sorry.

Big blocks of words are too hard to read. You need some white space and to get rid of any information that isn't completely necessary. We don't do venting sessions here.
Co-signed.

Thanks for typing. :D
 

Adaly07

Junior Member
Actually legally you are wrong. WE do not pay child support and for their insurance. WE do not have an appointment with a lawyer on Wedesdany. WE are not venting. Where is dad? Dad is the legal party involved.

actually WE do pay child support, it comes out of OUR bank account from OUR paychecks and gets mailed with OUR bills, the only place i was wrong here is that HE is court ordered not i to pay bills, and i do apologize for my over usage of the term WE

Okay.


YOU are overstepping. YOU have no right to push mom to get counseling for her daughter. YOU should confine your pushing only to your husband.
again i overused WE and i apologize, the father is pushing counseling and so is the school, they feel she needs something because shes a mess for a 7 yr old, thier words not mine,


WE should not be calling. Dad should be having this conversation not you.
your right, until today i had no actual conversation with her ,




Snipped some stuff but WE cannot get a good report from the counselor and WE do not have news for mom. Dad may have news and the court may have news.

and yes WE do get a good report from the counselor, she feels its a good idea im involved, not all the time but i go to 1 out of every 4 of thier visits to talk to her and she updates me as well,

YOU need to step back.
i dont feel how im out of line for this one and need to steo back, i havent done anything, everyone involved feels this child needs help, her father the counselor, the school, and both sets of grandparents are pushing the issue of counseling and the daughter has bgged to be able to go back


Is there a right of first refusal in the court papers? And who says you have to listen? YOU don't have to have anything to do with her. Dad might have to. But call waiting and voice mail are fabulous inventions.
yes actually i do have things to do with her, i deal with her kids and her verbal attacks on me, its her behavior that makes it impossible to live in this situation, thats one of the reasons for counsleing so we can all figure this out




Again -- WE don't matter. What dad thinks doesn't even matter.

i know, thats whats so frustrating, i feel like this person who lives on standby, like my life is not my own, believe me though even though i use WE a lot, ir eally do stay out of this business, i do talk to my husband about it, but it does pertain to my life, even though the legal system doesnt see it that way



YOU are NOT family. YOU do not belong in family counseling. The issues happen due to mom? Doesn't matter. Then mom and dad should be in family counseling with the children. NOT you. And NOT stepdad.

i beg to differ with you, i AM family, i am thier stepmother, we are a blended family, and issues that involve the kids that affect our home life are important to handle with the counselor, the counselor has requested i be at occasional meetings, we are trying to learn how to blend the family with outside interferance, so yes i am family, and comments like that from the kids mom is what has the situation out of control
 
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