They Don't Know Them!

[fairisfair]

I am going to agree with you as well, with this specific set of facts. Both of the children's other parents have abdicated the parental role. The mother of one child even said that she wants to be called "auntie".

In an instance like that, I don't have a problem with a stepparent being called mommy or daddy. I have a serious problem with it when children DO have an active mother or father in their lives....even if that parent is only marginally active.

However, its also critical that the parents be honest with the children, in age appropriate ways, so that the children grow up understanding that there was another mother/father out there, in case that mother/father ever pops back into the child's life.

As far as adoption is concerned in this particular scenario, its far too soon to be contemplating that, in my opinion. The abdicating parents haven't been gone long enough, and the couple has not been married long enough.

agreed. . . . . .

 

[LilCountry]

Here's Another Question!

I am going to agree with you as well, with this specific set of facts. Both of the children's other parents have abdicated the parental role. The mother of one child even said that she wants to be called "auntie".

In an instance like that, I don't have a problem with a stepparent being called mommy or daddy. I have a serious problem with it when children DO have an active mother or father in their lives....even if that parent is only marginally active.

However, its also critical that the parents be honest with the children, in age appropriate ways, so that the children grow up understanding that there was another mother/father out there, in case that mother/father ever pops back into the child's life.

As far as adoption is concerned in this particular scenario, its far too soon to be contemplating that, in my opinion. The abdicating parents haven't been gone long enough, and the couple has not been married long enough.

I do agree with you as well! THey will know about the half of there family. I have been in contact with my daughters' "real" father ex-wife (the one that he has the child with and with that in mind that is the only way that she gets to see her step-sister. I have a book with all the pic's that i had of him and his family set aside for her to have when she gets older and understands... I also have kept all paperwork that I have had to take to court so she can understand why I did what I did and shows in the paperwork that i was trying for a long time for him to see her! My son as well for that matter... I don't have many pic's except for a few of his "Real" mother and her family for him to know that as well... My husband has all the same paper work kept aside as well...

The marriage thing... I guess that I can see what everyone is talking about, it's just that in the line of work that my Husband does, he could lose his life any day that he goes to work... With all that said, Does anyone know of a writen letter that we might be able to draw up stating that if one of us dies, who we wanted the kids to go to???

 

[LdiJ]

I do agree with you as well! THey will know about the half of there family. I have been in contact with my daughters' "real" father ex-wife (the one that he has the child with and with that in mind that is the only way that she gets to see her step-sister. I have a book with all the pic's that i had of him and his family set aside for her to have when she gets older and understands... I also have kept all paperwork that I have had to take to court so she can understand why I did what I did and shows in the paperwork that i was trying for a long time for him to see her! My son as well for that matter... I don't have many pic's except for a few of his "Real" mother and her family for him to know that as well... My husband has all the same paper work kept aside as well...

The marriage thing... I guess that I can see what everyone is talking about, it's just that in the line of work that my Husband does, he could lose his life any day that he goes to work... With all that said, Does anyone know of a writen letter that we might be able to draw up stating that if one of us dies, who we wanted the kids to go to???

The child that your child's father has with another mother is NOT your child's stepsister. Technically she is your child's half-sister, but common usage these days is that they are simply "sisters".

Stepsister or stepbrother indicates that the children have no biological relationship. That is not the case here, the children have the same father.

It is permissible to state your wishes regarding what happens to your children in the event that you die, in your will. However, since children are not property, your wishes are not binding. Should either of the other parents of the children come forward after one of you passes away, the court will give them first standing as far as custody is concerned, and will give grandparents or aunts and uncles second standing. That doesn't necessarily mean that they will end up with custody, but it does mean that they will be first in line, and barring any signifcant fitness issues, they will get custody.

 

[LilCountry]

The child that your child's father has with another mother is NOT your child's stepsister. Technically she is your child's half-sister, but common usage these days is that they are simply "sisters".

Stepsister or stepbrother indicates that the children have no biological relationship. That is not the case here, the children have the same father.

That's what I meant! Sorry! Been A long Day!!!! I have a half-sister so i know all about it! lol!

 

[LilCountry]

????????????????

The marriage thing... I guess that I can see what everyone is talking about, it's just that in the line of work that my Husband does, he could lose his life any day that he goes to work... With all that said, Does anyone know of a writen letter that we might be able to draw up stating that if one of us dies, who we wanted the kids to go to?????

 

[LdiJ]

The marriage thing... I guess that I can see what everyone is talking about, it's just that in the line of work that my Husband does, he could lose his life any day that he goes to work... With all that said, Does anyone know of a writen letter that we might be able to draw up stating that if one of us dies, who we wanted the kids to go to?????

I already answered that question.

 

[LilCountry]

I already answered that question.

sorry i missed that! i saw it and thank you! Way too long of a day!!! haha

 

[janM]

If you were to try to terminate the parents' rights involuntarily, here's the criteria:
http://www.deltabravo.net/custody/termVA.php

I don't know if the Failure to Maintain Contact/Support is a year or not. That varies with different states I think.