Designating custody to a different family member

[pa1981]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? PA

If the parents willingly gave another member of their family primary physical custody of their child, is it revokable at will like gaurdianship is?

I am in the middle of negotiating a custody arraingement for my 3 year old nephew with my sister and the child's father (her ex boyfriend). I already have my nephew covered with Health insurance and enrolled in Pre-school, as he has lived here for well over a year (and off and on before that for long periods), and currently I have only a notarised letter which has been enough to get him medical care.

My primary goal is stability for my nephew. His parents goals are varied. The father has indicated that he will sign off on custody as long as his son keeps his last name, is brought to visit occassionally, and has his current support reduced or eliminated. All of which I would also agree to since I'm already the only way my nephew EVER sees his father, and the child support goes to my sister anyway, leaving us fully finacially responcible for my nephew.

My sister would like to keep the arrears from my nephew's father (which I think she will anyway legally even though she has rarely supported the child with it), keep the yearly tax exemption, and have no support obligation to pay. I would like to agree to this. I know all children have a right to be supported by their parents (before anyone yells at me about it), but frankly the child is well supported by us and happy as is, even without support money from the parents.

Can we all just walk into family division and file the custody arraingement with them? This is what my ex husband and I did since we were able to come to an agreement on custody. Gaurdianship seems like something that just designates legal custody to someone else temporarily, and on top of that gaurdianship looks to be revokable for any old reason by the parents. I would like something in place that would require a "change in circumstances of the child" just like regular custody does to change. I'm kinda walking on eggshells here.

 

[LdiJ]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? PA

If the parents willingly gave another member of their family primary physical custody of their child, is it revokable at will like gaurdianship is?

I am in the middle of negotiating a custody arraingement for my 3 year old nephew with my sister and the child's father (her ex boyfriend). I already have my nephew covered with Health insurance and enrolled in Pre-school, as he has lived here for well over a year (and off and on before that for long periods), and currently I have only a notarised letter which has been enough to get him medical care.

My primary goal is stability for my nephew. His parents goals are varied. The father has indicated that he will sign off on custody as long as his son keeps his last name, is brought to visit occassionally, and has his current support reduced or eliminated. All of which I would also agree to since I'm already the only way my nephew EVER sees his father, and the child support goes to my sister anyway, leaving us fully finacially responcible for my nephew.

My sister would like to keep the arrears from my nephew's father (which I think she will anyway legally even though she has rarely supported the child with it), keep the yearly tax exemption, and have no support obligation to pay. I would like to agree to this. I know all children have a right to be supported by their parents (before anyone yells at me about it), but frankly the child is well supported by us and happy as is, even without support money from the parents.

Can we all just walk into family division and file the custody arraingement with them? This is what my ex husband and I did since we were able to come to an agreement on custody. Gaurdianship seems like something that just designates legal custody to someone else temporarily, and on top of that gaurdianship looks to be revokable for any old reason by the parents. I would like something in place that would require a "change in circumstances of the child" just like regular custody does to change. I'm kinda walking on eggshells here.

Yes, you could all walk into court together and file an agreed order.

If you don't want child support from the parents a judge may sign off on that, but its not 100% guaranteed.

However, it would be tax fraud to allow your sister to take the tax exemption for the child. If that is included in the order, then you are agreeing to participate in tax fraud. You can choose not to claim the child yourself, and you wouldn't be responsible for what your sister does, but if you put it in writing, you would be actively participating in the fraud.

A parent cannot claim a child as a tax exemption unless the two parents combined are providing more than 50% of the child's support. Obviously, that will not be the case here (and probably hasn't been the case all along). In addition, a parent cannot claim EIC (which is probably primarily what your sister wants) unless the child has lived with them for a minimum of six months of the year.

Its also pretty tacky of your sister to ask for the tax exemption, when you will be the one 100% supporting the child.

 

[Ohiogal]

How has the child been on your insurance when you have not had custody of him?
And custody is PERMANENT and NOT revokable. It can be changed upon a substantial change in circumstance in the life of the child or your life if you are awarded custody but it is NOT revokable. And the parents would retain their parental rights (the right to the last name, visitation, support, choice of religion, ability to consent to adoption and what not).

 

[pa1981]

How has the child been on your insurance when you have not had custody of him?
And custody is PERMANENT and NOT revokable. It can be changed upon a substantial change in circumstance in the life of the child or your life if you are awarded custody but it is NOT revokable. And the parents would retain their parental rights (the right to the last name, visitation, support, choice of religion, ability to consent to adoption and what not).

He was not eligible to be on my insurance with my son, but I was able to have him covered by Chip by showing the notarised letter, his birth certificate, and social security card, as well as explaining the situation. PA Chip covers ALL uninsured kids regaurdless of income. Before that my ex husband and I had paid over 500$ in medical bills for his routine visits and immunisations. It was quite a hardship and we feared what would happen if he ever needed more expensive treatment. With Custody we could cover him ourselves.

It sounds like this is the route to go. Thanks so much for the help.

 

[pa1981]

I have a couple more questions:

1) Would the state go after either of the parents for child support because he was on Chip for a year? I will be covering him myself once Custody goes through.

2) Ohiogal, you mention being "awarded" custody. Is there a possibility that a judge would not approve of such an arraingement even with both parents present and in agreement? What would lead to such an objection?

3) I understand they would retain parental rights, but would a custody order give me any kind of standing? In other words if both parents conscented to adopting him out to someone else entirely, would I have any say in preventing this?

4) The order my ex and I have for our son was just written up point by point with all visitation stipulations and then submitted to the judge to sign. Would we have to write up a similar agreement for my nephew, or just something where each parent agrees to give me physical custody and share legal custody? Currently neither parent has much interest in regular visitation and just stops over once in a while, so writing specifics would be hard.

Thanks!