CO Says I can see them any reasonable time

[NHfather]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? NH. I have a CO that allows me the right to see My children anytime (with in reason) I chose. But I moved from NH to FL why? because I was hurt and angry and needed time and distance to let this hurt go away. Am I still hurt and anger? I'd have to say yes maybe so. But life needs to go on and I need My kids in that life so I'll stand strong and move on. Yesterday I bought a plane ticket to go home and see the kids (which she was fine with) today she calls me and says not to come home. That she doesn't think I'm ready and it wouldn't be good. I told her I'm fine and want to see my kids. Now I can't prove this but I'll bet My kids on it that her BF is behind this and I need to know what to do My flight isn't until the end of March but I feel that I need to get home now and nip this in the bud. I haven't been gone to long (2 months today) I gave her a heads up on my arrival which I'm hoping is all I need to do legally. She cannot stop Me from see them but she's trying to do just that. What are My options?

 

[futuredust]

What does the court order say, exactly. Is there a time frame you have to notify.

 

[NHfather]

no there's no time frame for that, Even if there was I told her thursday that I'd be home to see the kids for there B-Day which is 7 weeks from now, So I think I've given plenty of notice don't you? I also wouldn't just show up but I have no restrictions what so ever. But the first time I want to see them she tells me not to come home I know it's her BF, We don't get along. He's telling her that he doesn't want me around so she's telling me not to come home. This is were the anger comes in he's taking over as daddy and if I come home it will disrupt his plans (His plans for My kids mean little to Me) and yes THIS IS ANGERING ME. Now I just want to get home ASAP and nip this crappola in the bud before it gets out of hand. I don't want to hear that I shoudn't have left that's water under the bridge and I've been talking to the kids almost daily and they want me home they need me home. SO SHOULD I GO HOME NOW AND WHAT WILL I NEED TO DO TO INSURE THAT THIS GOES SMOOTHLY? I care only about My children and no I'm not looking to get back with her. I was the primary care giver and stay at home dad from day one so being away for the last 2 months has been killing me.

 

[2Mistakes]

no there's no time frame for that, Even if there was I told her thursday that I'd be home to see the kids for there B-Day which is 7 weeks from now, So I think I've given plenty of notice don't you? I also wouldn't just show up but I have no restrictions what so ever. But the first time I want to see them she tells me not to come home I know it's her BF, We don't get along. He's telling her that he doesn't want me around so she's telling me not to come home. This is were the anger comes in he's taking over as daddy and if I come home it will disrupt his plans (His plans for My kids mean little to Me) and yes THIS IS ANGERING ME. Now I just want to get home ASAP and nip this crappola in the bud before it gets out of hand. I don't want to hear that I shoudn't have left that's water under the bridge and I've been talking to the kids almost daily and they want me home they need me home. SO SHOULD I GO HOME NOW AND WHAT WILL I NEED TO DO TO INSURE THAT THIS GOES SMOOTHLY? I care only about My children and no I'm not looking to get back with her. I was the primary care giver and stay at home dad from day one so being away for the last 2 months has been killing me.

You may not want to hear it, but too bad.

You shouldn't have left. You have created this mess for yourself.

You were hurt, blah, blah, blah.

I caught my ex-wife in OUR bed with another man. But I didn't run off for 2 months. I stayed and parented the kids.

1. Go get your court order.
2. Come back here and type WORD for WORD what it says for custody and visitation.

 

[haiku]

Yes, you need to tell us exactly what your current court order states.

"reasonable visitation" is something that should really never be agreed to in court. it is very difficult to enforce, as what is reasonable to one person may not be reasonable to another.

now you could document these occasions and I recommend you do. But while doing so, I would suggest to you, if you really want a long distance relationship with your children, you will need to work up an excellent parenting plan, to outline specific times you would like to visit with your children.

Even if you are planning to return to the area, you should still outline specific visitation times and responsibilities so there is no confusion.

New Hampshire has their information online and outlines of the state parenting plan guidelines etc online. You might want to take a look at that.

 

[justalayman]

. I have a CO that allows me the right to see My children anytime (with in reason) I chose.

I believe you are interpreting the order how you want it to be read. I would suggest it is something more akin to "visitation to be liberal and reasonable as agreed upon by the parties".

Post exactly what the order states, not an interpretation.

So, unless there is something specific in the order, which you have said there is not, you cannot make claim to any specific time as it would need to be agreed on with your ex. As such, that makes it, as long as she is not agreeable, that you can actually never have visitation.

What you need to do is have the order modified. Since you are in Florida, it is of utmost importance to do this.

 

[NHfather]

This type of rhetoric

You were hurt, blah, blah, blah.

This is the type of rhetoric I see no use for. There's nothing productive in it. As for My problem it seams My X is still the same drunk I left 2 Months ago. She called Me the next day apologized and told Me I could come see them anytime. So I'll return and deal with what I have to deal with.
Oh and 2mistakes thanks for the kick while I'm down, Your obviously a big man.
One last thing 2mistakes is 1mistake to many.

 

[Ohiogal]

This is the type of rhetoric I see no use for. There's nothing productive in it. As for My problem it seams My X is still the same drunk I left 2 Months ago. She called Me the next day apologized and told Me I could come see them anytime. So I'll return and deal with what I have to deal with.
Oh and 2mistakes thanks for the kick while I'm down, Your obviously a big man.
One last thing 2mistakes is 1mistake to many.

Dude quite frankly, you deserve to be kicked. You ran off and left your children because YOUR FEELINGS were hurt. That is pathetic.

 

[CourtClerk]

This is the type of rhetoric I see no use for. There's nothing productive in it. As for My problem it seams My X is still the same drunk I left 2 Months ago. She called Me the next day apologized and told Me I could come see them anytime. So I'll return and deal with what I have to deal with.
Oh and 2mistakes thanks for the kick while I'm down, Your obviously a big man.
One last thing 2mistakes is 1mistake to many.

You know, there are way too many men in this world who are way too in touch with their feminine side. What's with all this whining and moaning and female like behavior out of MEN these days???? Ugghh..... grow some already. This board seems to be filled with men who should have been girls today.

 

[summerdawn]

This is the type of rhetoric I see no use for. There's nothing productive in it. As for My problem it seams My X is still the same drunk I left 2 Months ago. She called Me the next day apologized and told Me I could come see them anytime. So I'll return and deal with what I have to deal with.
Oh and 2mistakes thanks for the kick while I'm down, Your obviously a big man.
One last thing 2mistakes is 1mistake to many.

Was there something productive in taking off and leaving your children for 2 months?

 

[penelope10]

Good grief, most all of us are hurt and upset when we go through a divorce.However many of us deal with parenting and don't move away in order to lick our wounds. So you thought it was a good idea to move to another state, Mom has the kids, and she's a drunk?

If this were truly the case then you really let your kiddos down by not being around in case something should happen...

I agree with the other poster that you need to file word for word what the order says in regards to visitation so that you can get the correct legal advice.

And by the way 2Mistakes is a real man, he is the CP, and does a great job doing it. (And he has an extremely difficult ex as many of us have).

This is not being said to be ugly, but to point out that moving away was a serious screw up on your part. In order to get help you will need post exactly what your order says in regards to visitation.

 

[stealth2]

This is the type of rhetoric I see no use for. There's nothing productive in it. As for My problem it seams My X is still the same drunk I left 2 Months ago. She called Me the next day apologized and told Me I could come see them anytime. So I'll return and deal with what I have to deal with.
Oh and 2mistakes thanks for the kick while I'm down, Your obviously a big man.
One last thing 2mistakes is 1mistake to many.

So... she's the same drunk you left your kids with for nearly 4 months (since you're not going back for another 7 weeks). That's noble. You don't get to whine about her when you left the kids there.

Running away solves no problems - it only creates more. Whisch is exactly what you've done. So quit whining.

 

[NHfather]

ran to warmth

first off I didn't want to leave but when your left with nothing more than a trailor full of camping eqiupment and winter setting in to New England you don't have many options. houseing close By was not an option and I've only just put a roof over my head this past week. I lost my home $2000.00 a month and my kids it was already cold and getting colder. she has primery custody and visitation was to be desided between the 2 of us (meaning she makes the FN rules and I get the shaft)