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Peek-A-Boo Daddy Issue

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What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? LA

Hello all, need a lil help here. Dad wanted to terminate his rights 4 months ago, has had no contact with our daughter since, but continued with child support. I denied his request to terminate rights, as I did not believe that to be in the best interest of our daughter. Dad claims to have been "out of town" working, and recently was fired. Maybe he failed a pee pee test? Who knows, not my problem. Here is the scenario, today his wife emails me asking to re-instate visiation this weekend. I know I need to have our daughter available because I do not intend on violating the court order, however this weekend is MY scheduled weekend. While he is so caring in trying to do what's best for our daughter, I do not think it is in her best interest that her daddy cut off contact with her for 4 months period, then all of the sudden re-appear. Now he wants to swoop in like nothing happened. WOuld it be possible to have our daughter sort of wheen back in to the visitation stage by just seeing him for the next few Saturdays or Sundays all day, then start up with overnights again?

As for child support issue, he was jobless 2 years ago for an entire year and still managed to pay. Is this my problem, that he can't afford child support, or will a judge allow him to forfeit his payments?

Also, is it safe for me to block them from emailing me? It is not the ex emailing me, and I would prefer a telephone conversation. The judge ordered that email was allowed as a way of communication, but also advised telephone was the better way of communicating. I mean afterall, he records our every conversation, and I have absolutely no problem with that.

He is in contempt for not drug screening, his wife has contacted me, wife has spanked my daughter ( I have in writing her defense for why she did it, she is lucky to still be walking), he has not been available for any of his court ordered visitation since 1st week of November 2008 (new policy just went into effect in LA about a parent not appearing to exchange child for visitation would be found in contempt), and has not contacted me since 1st week of November regarding his "new job" which is also court ordered. I had him served in November, and he responded with wanting to terminate his rights, having no contact with me or our daughter for 4 months, thinking it was in her best interest because of our fighting (which was NEVER in front of her), to terminate his rights at the time, and now wanting to start up his visitations again???. If I brought this up to the judge about dad wanting to terminate his rights, what would you think his dimeanor would be regarding visitation?

Any thoughts?

Thank you all.
 
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2Mistakes

Senior Member
Please post a link to this "new policy" that went into effect in LA about a parent being in contempt for not exercising his/her visitation.
 

Isis1

Senior Member
you cannot change the court order. if dad gets them on his weekends you cannot stop him without being in contempt.

if dad wants to visit on YOUR weekend, you can be gracious and allow him a few hours at your descretion.
 

jbowman

Senior Member
OR you can ignore all together since the wife is the one that contacted you and not dad. Which is exactly what I would do.
 
My attorney informed me of the new policy that recently went into effect. I have no intention of breaking the court order, but I have full intention of taking him back for contempt. I just don't think it is healthy to throw my daughter at her father when she hasn't spoken to him or seen him in 4 months. I will do what I have to do to comply.
 

Ohiogal

Queen Bee
What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? LA

Hello all, need a lil help here. Dad wanted to terminate his rights 4 months ago, has had no contact with our daughter since, but continued with child support. I denied his request to terminate rights, as I did not believe that to be in the best interest of our daughter.
YOU denied it? Oh give me a break. YOU can NOT deny it. NOR can YOU grant his request to terminate rights. Only the COURT can do that.

Dad claims to have been "out of town" working, and recently was fired. Maybe he failed a pee pee test? Who knows, not my problem.
So why bring it up?

Here is the scenario, today his wife emails me asking to re-instate visiation this weekend. I know I need to have our daughter available because I do not intend on violating the court order, however this weekend is MY scheduled weekend.
What does your court order state regarding visitation? How do you know this is YOUR weekend?

While he is so caring in trying to do what's best for our daughter, I do not think it is in her best interest that her daddy cut off contact with her for 4 months period, then all of the sudden re-appear. Now he wants to swoop in like nothing happened. WOuld it be possible to have our daughter sort of wheen back in to the visitation stage by just seeing him for the next few Saturdays or Sundays all day, then start up with overnights again?

Does the court order allow you to gradually increase his visitation until he starts up overnights? If so then yes. If not, then NO. He is entitled to the time spelled out.
As for child support issue, he was jobless 2 years ago for an entire year and still managed to pay. Is this my problem, that he can't afford child support, or will a judge allow him to forfeit his payments?
What does the order state?


Also, is it safe for me to block them from emailing me? It is not the ex emailing me, and I would prefer a telephone conversation.
You can block his wife. As for being safe you then state this:

The judge ordered that email was allowed as a way of communication, but also advised telephone was the better way of communicating. I mean afterall, he records our every conversation, and I have absolutely no problem with that.
And the judge ordered email was allowed so you can NOT block him.

He is in contempt for not drug screening, his wife has contacted me, wife has spanked my daughter ( I have in writing her defense for why she did it, she is lucky to still be walking), he has not been available for any of his court ordered visitation since 1st week of November 2008 (new policy just went into effect in LA about a parent not appearing to exchange child for visitation would be found in contempt), and has not contacted me since 1st week of November regarding his "new job" which is also court ordered.
The COURT found him in contempt? Because if not then he is not in contempt. If you believe he is contempt then you file the proper motions.

I had him served in November,
Served for what?

and he responded with wanting to terminate his rights, having no contact with me or our daughter for 4 months, thinking it was in her best interest because of our fighting (which was NEVER in front of her), to terminate his rights at the time, and now wanting to start up his visitations again???. If I brought this up to the judge about dad wanting to terminate his rights, what would you think his dimeanor would be regarding visitation?
Don't know what the judge's demeanor would be.
Any thoughts?
You have a COURT ORDER not a Court suggestion or a COURT WHATEVER I WANT. You follow the order. And when the order is modified you follow the new order. And continue.

Thank you all.[/QUOTE]
 

2Mistakes

Senior Member
My attorney informed me of the new policy that recently went into effect. I have no intention of breaking the court order, but I have full intention of taking him back for contempt. I just don't think it is healthy to throw my daughter at her father when she hasn't spoken to him or seen him in 4 months. I will do what I have to do to comply.
So are you saying that your attorney told you that your ex can be found in contempt if he doesn't exercise his visitation. I think either your attorney is confused, or you are confused.

And courts don't have policies for things like that. They have laws.

How old is your child?

My ex sees our children every 6 or 7 months (sometimes longer) and it's not been a problem.
 

Ohiogal

Queen Bee
Well it is NOT in the Louisiana state code that he can be found in contempt. HOWEVER does he have joint physical custody?
 

CJane

Senior Member
This:
new policy just went into effect in LA about a parent not appearing to exchange child for visitation would be found in contempt
Is NOT the same as the NCP being found in contempt for not visiting. Good Lord.

If it's your weekend, it's your weekend. If it's his, and he chooses to show up wherever the drop-off is per the order and you're not there, then YOU are in contempt.
 
Ok, OG, dad was served last November for Contempt issues that I listed. Instead of showing up for court, his attorney moved for continuance without a date because dad wanted to terminate his rights. I told my attorney no, that this was not an option.

Court ordered visitation began every other Fri-Sun beginning (date in 07 which was to be his weekend, which means that this is my weekend today in 09).

As for child support, he is ordered to pay it and failure to have it in my hands by the 1st of each month will result in contempt.

As for emails, the email is set up under his wife's name and her full name is in the email address that "he" uses.

If he and I agreed to gradually increase the visitation, would he be able to hold me in contempt in the future??

There is a new case law here in Louisiana regarding a parent not exercising their visitation. Dad and I have joint custody with me as domicilliary parent.

The court has not found him in contempt for anything because we have not gone. He wanted to terminate his rights instead and now all of the sudden wants to see our daughter. I have no problem with that at all, but I will not have him in and out whenever it is convenient for him. He has not been out of town working either, he has used that excuse as the reason he has not had contact with our daughter. I have a friend that works with him, and he has not left the state within the last 4 months.
 

2Mistakes

Senior Member
There is a new case law here in Louisiana regarding a parent not exercising their visitation.
I call BS on this.

I've googled every combination I can think of, and nothing.

If there is a law, please by all means, post it.

And from a credible source please. No Wiki crap.
 

Ohiogal

Queen Bee
Ok, OG, dad was served last November for Contempt issues that I listed. Instead of showing up for court, his attorney moved for continuance without a date because dad wanted to terminate his rights. I told my attorney no, that this was not an option.

Court ordered visitation began every other Fri-Sun beginning (date in 07 which was to be his weekend, which means that this is my weekend today in 09).

As for child support, he is ordered to pay it and failure to have it in my hands by the 1st of each month will result in contempt.

As for emails, the email is set up under his wife's name and her full name is in the email address that "he" uses.

If he and I agreed to gradually increase the visitation, would he be able to hold me in contempt in the future??

There is a new case law here in Louisiana regarding a parent not exercising their visitation. Dad and I have joint custody with me as domicilliary parent.

The court has not found him in contempt for anything because we have not gone. He wanted to terminate his rights instead and now all of the sudden wants to see our daughter. I have no problem with that at all, but I will not have him in and out whenever it is convenient for him. He has not been out of town working either, he has used that excuse as the reason he has not had contact with our daughter. I have a friend that works with him, and he has not left the state within the last 4 months.
If he has joint PHYSICAL custody he can be found in contempt. They can remove custody from him but they will not penalize him with fines and/or jail for not exercising his time. And what is the case law to which you refer?
 
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