Smoking during parenting time

[doc2b]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? MI

I kind of asked this question the other day, but it got buried in my waaay to long post.

How does my husband handle addressing the issue of the kids' mom smoking during her parenting time without actual physical proof she is doing it? The kids are smelling more and more like smoke, one is back to a chronic cough, the other is having regular migraines...not to mention they're concerned about their mom's health, as well as their own. Not smoking during parenting time is part of the court order because both kids suffer pretty bad asthma and allergies that are aggravated by smoke.

He has sent many emails, but she either she doesn't respond or basically says the kids are lying and none of his business. The kids have seen her smoking a couple of times recently, but most of the time, they're just finding her butts in their toilet/sink, etc and can tell that she's been smoking when they walk into her bedroom because she closes herself in there. They come complaining to dad and want him to help (they know it's in the court order not to smoke), but he has no clue what to do.

If he files a Motion to Show Cause, he has no proof to bring, just the kids' word (which does mean a lot to him, just not to the courts, I'm assuming). Does anybody have any ideas what way he should/could approach this?

Thank you!

 

[TheGeekess]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? MI

I kind of asked this question the other day, but it got buried in my waaay to long post.

How does my husband handle addressing the issue of the kids' mom smoking during her parenting time without actual physical proof she is doing it? The kids are smelling more and more like smoke, one is back to a chronic cough, the other is having regular migraines...not to mention they're concerned about their mom's health, as well as their own. Not smoking during parenting time is part of the court order because both kids suffer pretty bad asthma and allergies that are aggravated by smoke.

He has sent many emails, but she either she doesn't respond or basically says the kids are lying and none of his business. The kids have seen her smoking a couple of times recently, but most of the time, they're just finding her butts in their toilet/sink, etc and can tell that she's been smoking when they walk into her bedroom because she closes herself in there. They come complaining to dad and want him to help (they know it's in the court order not to smoke), but he has no clue what to do.

If he files a Motion to Show Cause, he has no proof to bring, just the kids' word (which does mean a lot to him, just not to the courts, I'm assuming). Does anybody have any ideas what way he should/could approach this?

Thank you!

Buy Mom an air purifier. Let the children give it to her for Mother's Day.

 

[doc2b]

Buy Mom an air purifier. Let the children give it to her for Mother's Day.

Riiighhttt....

Instead, maybe we can just upgrade the kiddos to hospital grade nebulizers over here instead of the dinky ones they're on now...wouldn't want to inconvenience mom with a device that would hike up her electricity bill.

 

[LdiJ]

Riiighhttt....

Instead, maybe we can just upgrade the kiddos to hospital grade nebulizers over here instead of the dinky ones they're on now...wouldn't want to inconvenience mom with a device that would hike up her electricity bill.

Air purifiers actually do a really good job...particularly if they are in the designated smoking room...and don't use much electricity.

An order that states that a parent cannot smoke at all when the children are with the parent is an order that is virtually impossible to enforce.

Parents working together to ensure that smoking does not impact the children (in a non-judgemental way) are parents who are good co-parents.

 

[CJane]

Here's how it'll go.

Dad: She smokes around the kids!
Judge: Do you smoke around the kids Mom?
Mom: I object. He has no way of knowing what happens in my home.
Judge: Sustained. Sir, do you have any proof Mom smokes around the kids?
Dad: Well, they smell like smoke, your honor.
Judge: Mom, do you ever take them anywhere people might be smoking, such as a restaurant or other public place that allows smoking?
Mom: Yessir.
Judge: Do you smoke in your home when the children are not present?
Mom: Yessir.
Judge: Do you smoke around the children?
Mom: No sir.
Judge: Dad, do you have any proof Mom is smoking in the presence of the children?
Dad: No sir.
Judge: Dismissed.

 

[doc2b]

Air purifiers actually do a really good job...particularly if they are in the designated smoking room...and don't use much electricity.

An order that states that a parent cannot smoke at all when the children are with the parent is an order that is virtually impossible to enforce.

Parents working together to ensure that smoking does not impact the children (in a non-judgemental way) are parents who are good co-parents.

Yes, I agree with all this...I can have my husband look into air purifiers, but I know at the moment we can't afford one. They may be covered by our insurance with a prescription, though.

 

[doc2b]

Here's how it'll go.

Dad: She smokes around the kids!
Judge: Do you smoke around the kids Mom?
Mom: I object. He has no way of knowing what happens in my home.
Judge: Sustained. Sir, do you have any proof Mom smokes around the kids?
Dad: Well, they smell like smoke, your honor.
Judge: Mom, do you ever take them anywhere people might be smoking, such as a restaurant or other public place that allows smoking?
Mom: Yessir.
Judge: Do you smoke in your home when the children are not present?
Mom: Yessir.
Judge: Do you smoke around the children?
Mom: No sir.
Judge: Dad, do you have any proof Mom is smoking in the presence of the children?
Dad: No sir.
Judge: Dismissed.

Thanks, CJane...That is what I figured. That's very frustrating.