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Caught wife cheating, now she claims abuse

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djhjvlh

Junior Member
Georgia

I caught my wife having cheating with 2 other guys on the internet, planning to meet up with one of them, i thought something was going on for a few weeks but put it to the back of my mind as i trusted my wife and thought we had a great 6 year marrage, but when the phone rang she ran to it and startedt to go outside with it she has never done this in our 7 years od being together. She would spend more and more time on the internet, ignoring our 5 year old son and instead be typing away to who knows, i would walk into the room and as soon as i entered she would click the screen off. She told me that the guy who lives in the house behind me asked her to go over one afternoon for some fun. The next day i see her standing at the window with just a bra on rubbing herself and the curtains open (my wife never has the curtains open as she likes the darkness) i asked her what she was doing and she said applying lotion.
Over the pst few weeks she has been going out more and more on a friday and saturday night with her friends, i went to work on the sunday and a friend of mine come up and told me she is posting weird things on her facebook he showed me one saying (i am proud to be a MILF) if you dont know MILF means Mother Id Like to F..k. I asked her about it and she told me it was one of her 15 year old sons friends that said it to her.
I then had to go on her hotmail to get my friends e mail address, and found a e mail to a guy saying she tried to call him and not to phone her back as didnt want husband to know, he replied to her saying he wanted to come and see her and cannot wait to hang out with her, also calling her beautiful and saying he would talk to her tomorrow. at this point i asked her what was happening and she said he was just a friend. i asked her to move out of the bedroom and she wouldnt so i threw her things into the spare room and closed the locked our bedroom door, she in a rage tried to kick the door in causing the door to come off the hinges.
the week went on with us rowing and i offered to move out so she could have everything, she declined and stayed. Two more things, while moving her things out of the bedroom i seen she had all new sex underware, for the last 3 years i have only ever seen my wife in granny panties, i also found condoms in her drawer, my wife and i NEVER use condoms, so i am guessing they was not for my use. The next night i thought we was moving on and trying to get back together so we made love, right after we made love she looked me into the eyes and said THAT MENT NOTHING TO ME. I had to contact the bank, it was then that i found out that over $4500 was missing from the joint account, i asked her about it and she said she took it, i asked her what she had done with it and she said she paid the bills.
I siad to her tuesday morning that i needed the camera left out so i could sell my things on e bay (star wars figures) as i didnt want them no more, along with other things i did not use and told her i would be late home as i had to sort out somethings (pay bills and go to the bank to sort out the mess she had left it in. I went to work on tuesday and she phoned me at work, she said was i going to see a lawyer, i said i was going to see one to see about the situation we was in (i love my wife and always wanted to work things out with her so there was no way i wanted a divorce) she then said you will regert it if you carry on and see the lawyer, i said why are you threating me what to she replied YOU WILL BE SORRY i said goodbye and put the phone down. I returned home to find things missing, the laptop was gone along with the tv ps3 computer and the doors was open. I thought someone had stole the property and phoned the police. they came around and it was then i found my wifes wedding ring along with her clothes missing and all of my sons clothes gone too. i phoned my lawyer and he told me to get the police again to file a report, what i did. I changed the locks as i was scared that i would come home from work the next day to find everything else missing from the house. She didnt even let me know where she was, no note or anything, i phoned her friends and family but no one knew.
Wednesday i went to work, she knew i worked from 7 to 3 and she left 4 messages on the answer phone.
1 david i need to come to pick some things up
2 was my 5 year old son, daddy dont call the police i love you daddy
3 was my wife, Josh misses you and he wants to see you so please phone me back.
4 my wife again, okay if you dont want to see your son i will tell him daddy does not want to see him.
She has a new cell phone amd i do not know the number, when she phones my house it comes up with UNKNOWN NAME UNKNOWEN NUMBER on caller ID so i do not know how she expects me to phone her back.
I went to work on thursday, and my wife phoned to see what time i finished work, one of my co workers told her i finished at 3pm, i thought great she is going to bring Josh to see me and spend sometime with me, i was so excited and rushed home. when i got there a sheriff follwed me in and served me with papers.
The papers was PETITION FOR TEMPORARY PROTECTIVE ORDER In the order she says throughout our 6 year marrage i havehurt her, tried to hurt her, threatened me, hit her, slapped her, choked me, choked her several times causing her to fear for her life and the safty of our child. I couldnt believe it, i broke down and couldnt believe her lies. the order also states that i cannot have no contact with my son untill it goes to court on 11th may 2009. It is breaking my heart knowing that my little boy is missing his daddy, he is a daddys boy as i did most things with him wihile the wife fed his mcdonalds, burgerking, pizza, and fried chicken most days, while i was playing with him she was always on the computer or on the telephone with her friends.
When we 1st got together my wife told me that her ex husband used to abuse her, she told me the father of her 1st son abused her too, along with years ago her fater abused her and also her papa abused her.
My wife has i history of mental illness, she was put into a mental institution by her fater when she was in her late teens, after she had our son she treated him real badly and it was called post natal depresion, along with a breakdown, also last year she had to go and see a mental illness doctor.
I just do not know what to do, i contacted a lawyer and he told me she has the upper hand as most judges believe the wife in cases like this.
If anyone knows what or can give me advice on how to prove she is lying, anything even a percent of even seeing my child again please let me now.
Many thanks
David

Please forgive me for spelling, at the moment i am in such a messWhat is the name of your state (only U.S. law)?
 


djhjvlh

Junior Member
sorry caught my wife cheating, then 3 weeks later she moves out taking property with her. She ends up living in a abuse center, and has now filed a petition for temporary protective order against me. Meaning i cannot see my son untill we go to court. The order is claiming i hurt her, tried to hurt her, threatened her, hit her, slapped her, choked her, choked her several times. I have never hit, choked, slapped, or abused her.
This all comes about after i found out about her cheating.
 
Ga. does not mess around with this kind of thing. I dont think she could go to a Domestic violence shelter without having you arrested for abuse, or a fight. and for that im pritty confident you have to have fought her, and left marks. which to tell you the truth, i think you did.

maby it was a heat of passion, maby you were drunk, whatever your not good enough excuse is... sorry to hear theres a kid involved.

just take it as it comes. you should get a lawyer, and sue for custody or liberal visitation.
 

djhjvlh

Junior Member
No i was not arrested because there was no abuse, no marks, no fight, just solid constant arguing even after we made up one night and made love she looked me in the eyes and said that ment nothing to her, if abuse is threats, the only threat i said was i was going for full custody of my son, because of her past mental illness problems and the way she abandoned her 1st son.
 

outhouse

Member
[[[Ga. does not mess around with this kind of thing. I dont think she could go to a Domestic violence shelter without having you arrested for abuse, or a fight. and for that im pritty confident you have to have fought her, and left marks. which to tell you the truth, i think you did]]]

your are wrong in making any kind of assumption for or against the OP

your also wrong in assuming that the shelter needs a arrest or a fight. she could be admited on flase allegations of abuse.

OP


find out if there is court ordered mediation, if so your going

try less emotions and more facts if you want help

in Ca i was sent to emergency mediation where they put me on supervised visitation. I did not see my daughter for 3 weeks. It was a total of 7 weeks before i got to the real mediator who realized the truth and the ex was ordered to supervised visitation far worse then what i was on. [all cases are different dont expect the same outcome]

welcome to the legal system CALM down report facts not emotional testomony that carry,s no weight
 
Last edited:

nolleprosequi

Junior Member
Whatever happened?

This situation sounds vaguely similar to something I went through, actually, almost identical.

I hope that the Prot Order was dismissed. If not, you may be in for a world of legal garbage.

The best thing to do if the Prot Order went through is:

- File Divorce - absolute based on adultery (you don't need an attorney, $135 or so)
- Cut off all joint bank accounts, credit cards
- Move out, your son will be ok, you can fight for him only if you are taking care of yourself and have your own emotions in check
- Go to a therapist, if you don't you will just be an angry person
- Have no contact with her after you move out - this is hard, I know - you love your son but you need to take care of yourself first, and no, it is not selfish
 

Banned_Princess

Senior Member
GA absolutely does not mess around with these type of aligations, and if you have not already, I suggest you invest in an lawyer right away.
 

Zigner

Senior Member, Non-Attorney
This situation sounds vaguely similar to something I went through, actually, almost identical.

I hope that the Prot Order was dismissed. If not, you may be in for a world of legal garbage.

The best thing to do if the Prot Order went through is:

- File Divorce - absolute based on adultery (you don't need an attorney, $135 or so)
- Cut off all joint bank accounts, credit cards
- Move out, your son will be ok, you can fight for him only if you are taking care of yourself and have your own emotions in check
- Go to a therapist, if you don't you will just be an angry person
- Have no contact with her after you move out - this is hard, I know - you love your son but you need to take care of yourself first, and no, it is not selfish
There is no need to necropost (responding to a long-dead thread)
 

boboconnor73

Junior Member
Georgia

I caught my wife having cheating with 2 other guys on the internet, planning to meet up with one of them, i thought something was going on for a few weeks but put it to the back of my mind as i trusted my wife and thought we had a great 6 year marrage, but when the phone rang she ran to it and startedt to go outside with it she has never done this in our 7 years od being together. She would spend more and more time on the internet, ignoring our 5 year old son and instead be typing away to who knows, i would walk into the room and as soon as i entered she would click the screen off. She told me that the guy who lives in the house behind me asked her to go over one afternoon for some fun. The next day i see her standing at the window with just a bra on rubbing herself and the curtains open (my wife never has the curtains open as she likes the darkness) i asked her what she was doing and she said applying lotion.
Over the pst few weeks she has been going out more and more on a friday and saturday night with her friends, i went to work on the sunday and a friend of mine come up and told me she is posting weird things on her facebook he showed me one saying (i am proud to be a MILF) if you dont know MILF means Mother Id Like to F..k. I asked her about it and she told me it was one of her 15 year old sons friends that said it to her.
I then had to go on her hotmail to get my friends e mail address, and found a e mail to a guy saying she tried to call him and not to phone her back as didnt want husband to know, he replied to her saying he wanted to come and see her and cannot wait to hang out with her, also calling her beautiful and saying he would talk to her tomorrow. at this point i asked her what was happening and she said he was just a friend. i asked her to move out of the bedroom and she wouldnt so i threw her things into the spare room and closed the locked our bedroom door, she in a rage tried to kick the door in causing the door to come off the hinges.
the week went on with us rowing and i offered to move out so she could have everything, she declined and stayed. Two more things, while moving her things out of the bedroom i seen she had all new sex underware, for the last 3 years i have only ever seen my wife in granny panties, i also found condoms in her drawer, my wife and i NEVER use condoms, so i am guessing they was not for my use. The next night i thought we was moving on and trying to get back together so we made love, right after we made love she looked me into the eyes and said THAT MENT NOTHING TO ME. I had to contact the bank, it was then that i found out that over $4500 was missing from the joint account, i asked her about it and she said she took it, i asked her what she had done with it and she said she paid the bills.
I siad to her tuesday morning that i needed the camera left out so i could sell my things on e bay (star wars figures) as i didnt want them no more, along with other things i did not use and told her i would be late home as i had to sort out somethings (pay bills and go to the bank to sort out the mess she had left it in. I went to work on tuesday and she phoned me at work, she said was i going to see a lawyer, i said i was going to see one to see about the situation we was in (i love my wife and always wanted to work things out with her so there was no way i wanted a divorce) she then said you will regert it if you carry on and see the lawyer, i said why are you threating me what to she replied YOU WILL BE SORRY i said goodbye and put the phone down. I returned home to find things missing, the laptop was gone along with the tv ps3 computer and the doors was open. I thought someone had stole the property and phoned the police. they came around and it was then i found my wifes wedding ring along with her clothes missing and all of my sons clothes gone too. i phoned my lawyer and he told me to get the police again to file a report, what i did. I changed the locks as i was scared that i would come home from work the next day to find everything else missing from the house. She didnt even let me know where she was, no note or anything, i phoned her friends and family but no one knew.
Wednesday i went to work, she knew i worked from 7 to 3 and she left 4 messages on the answer phone.
1 david i need to come to pick some things up
2 was my 5 year old son, daddy dont call the police i love you daddy
3 was my wife, Josh misses you and he wants to see you so please phone me back.
4 my wife again, okay if you dont want to see your son i will tell him daddy does not want to see him.
She has a new cell phone amd i do not know the number, when she phones my house it comes up with UNKNOWN NAME UNKNOWEN NUMBER on caller ID so i do not know how she expects me to phone her back.
I went to work on thursday, and my wife phoned to see what time i finished work, one of my co workers told her i finished at 3pm, i thought great she is going to bring Josh to see me and spend sometime with me, i was so excited and rushed home. when i got there a sheriff follwed me in and served me with papers.
The papers was PETITION FOR TEMPORARY PROTECTIVE ORDER In the order she says throughout our 6 year marrage i havehurt her, tried to hurt her, threatened me, hit her, slapped her, choked me, choked her several times causing her to fear for her life and the safty of our child. I couldnt believe it, i broke down and couldnt believe her lies. the order also states that i cannot have no contact with my son untill it goes to court on 11th may 2009. It is breaking my heart knowing that my little boy is missing his daddy, he is a daddys boy as i did most things with him wihile the wife fed his mcdonalds, burgerking, pizza, and fried chicken most days, while i was playing with him she was always on the computer or on the telephone with her friends.
When we 1st got together my wife told me that her ex husband used to abuse her, she told me the father of her 1st son abused her too, along with years ago her fater abused her and also her papa abused her.
My wife has i history of mental illness, she was put into a mental institution by her fater when she was in her late teens, after she had our son she treated him real badly and it was called post natal depresion, along with a breakdown, also last year she had to go and see a mental illness doctor.
I just do not know what to do, i contacted a lawyer and he told me she has the upper hand as most judges believe the wife in cases like this.
If anyone knows what or can give me advice on how to prove she is lying, anything even a percent of even seeing my child again please let me now.
Many thanks
David

Please forgive me for spelling, at the moment i am in such a messWhat is the name of your state (only U.S. law)?
So I assume that you are not surprised by her conduct ... wife's allegations of abuse are not given any different weight than any other stuff they here.
 

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