Status Hearing/Scheduling Mediation - School Issues

[SimplyMom]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? AK

My husband's status hearing is scheduled for tomorrow, and mediation will be scheduled from there.

At issue is where their son will attend school. Currently both parents live 25 minutes away from each other, but in the same district. Custody is 50/50 week-on, week-off w/joint legal. His ex wants full custody, but there are no grounds for a change at this time.

My husband just got an email today that his ex-wife will be moving next weekend and will now be about 45 minutes away (still in the same school district).

Her new local school is "better" than the previous one, but still not as "good" as the local school here.

His ex's biggest issue with the schools has been how far away they are from each other, but yet now she is moving even farther away.

Is this good for her or bad? The new school area is better than her previous one, but she's increasing the distance she says is the issue in the first place.

Thank you.

 

[nextwife]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? AK

My husband's status hearing is scheduled for tomorrow, and mediation will be scheduled from there.

Custody is 50/50 week-on, week-off w/joint legal. His ex wants full custody, but there are no grounds for a change at this time.

My husband just got an email today that his ex-wife will be moving next weekend and will now be about 45 minutes away (still in the same school district).


His ex's biggest issue with the schools has been how far away they are from each other, but yet now she is moving even farther away.

\]
Sounds like she's trying to CREATE ground to cease the joint physical custody. By creating an unmanageable distance to continue 50/50, she's trying to usurp the joint custody and guaranty herself full physical custody.

 

[SimplyMom]

Well thats a new possibility. Wow, it's not too much of a stretch to think that someone would move to facilitate something like that.

The actual distance adds only about 10 miles, but because of the location it increases the drive time.

Will the judge look at housing stability at all when considering a school location?

My husband was thinking that if his ex decided to bring up the distance as the reason it would be a hardship for her to transport their son to his school, the judge wouldn't give it too much weight since she decided to increase that distance.

 

[CJane]

\]
Sounds like she's trying to CREATE ground to cease the joint physical custody. By creating an unmanageable distance to continue 50/50, she's trying to usurp the joint custody and guaranty herself full physical custody.

On what planet does 45 minutes make 50/50 impossible?

 

[nextwife]

On what planet does 45 minutes make 50/50 impossible?

45 minutes on a dry day is easily 1 1/4- 1 1/2 hours on every snowy/icy morning.

 

[SimplyMom]

Factors in deciding school location

Will her moving have any affect on the school decision if mediation doesn't work?

 

[CJane]

45 minutes on a dry day is easily 1 1/4- 1 1/2 hours on every snowy/icy morning.

You do a lot of driving in Alaska?

I'm thinking, if it was REALLY going to take 1+ hours to get the kids anywhere in the Winter, and the issue is SCHOOLS, which primarily take place during WINTER, the poster would have said "It's at least 45 minutes, but if the weather is bad, it's really more like 90 minutes."

But she didn't.

OP? Moving a total of TEN MILES to be near a better school is likely going to have NO negative impact on Mom. It's likely to have no positive impact either.

If Mom and Dad are at a total impasse regarding which school the children will attend, and mediation fails, it's up to the judge to decide based on a host of factors including ties to the community, where the children spend a majority of school hours, the availability of before/after school care, etc.

 

[SimplyMom]

I apologize for not elaborating. Yes, winter driving will add a considerable amount to the drive time. Her new house is located in a completely different part of the city, with a lot of traffic congestion during peak drive times, and snow/ice exacerbate that. Her old house was located close to the highway, which made it a much quicker drive. This city has not kept up with population growth, so it's a pain getting anywhere.


The parents are at a total impasse regarding school. They'd agreed on a charter school, but it's a lottery process and their son will not be able to attend this year. Two days before his ex requested mediation she signed their son up for a different school without telling my husband until after the lottery closed out. This makes it impossible for him to attend school with his step sister (my husband is in the process of adopting her with my ex's permission). They both are due to start kindergarden in the fall.

So him attending school with his sister is a factor, he has neighborhood friends that will be going there next year, both schools offer before/after care but my husband will be going back to college next fall and will be working his class schedule around the childrens', so we wouldn't need to utilize it (I'm glad the kids won't have to take the bus, either). The mother runs a home daycare and says that she will be doing the transportation herself also.

 

[CJane]

I apologize for not elaborating. Yes, winter driving will add a considerable amount to the drive time. Her new house is located in a completely different part of the city, with a lot of traffic congestion during peak drive times, and snow/ice exacerbate that. Her old house was located close to the highway, which made it a much quicker drive. This city has not kept up with population growth, so it's a pain getting anywhere.

Of course it will.

But whatever. I know from experience that 50/50 is just fine even given a distance of an hour or so, if the parents WANT it to work.

What is the EXACT time share that hubby has?

The parents are at a total impasse regarding school. They'd agreed on a charter school, but it's a lottery process and their son will not be able to attend this year.

Then it's not an option.

Two days before his ex requested mediation she signed their son up for a different school without telling my husband until after the lottery closed out. This makes it impossible for him to attend school with his step sister (my husband is in the process of adopting her with my ex's permission). They both are due to start kindergarden in the fall.

Irrelevant. He doesn't need to attend with his step-sister. And in fact it may be better if he does not.

So him attending school with his sister is a factor, he has neighborhood friends that will be going there next year, both schools offer before/after care but my husband will be going back to college next fall and will be working his class schedule around the childrens', so we wouldn't need to utilize it (I'm glad the kids won't have to take the bus, either). The mother runs a home daycare and says that she will be doing the transportation herself also.

Both parents are capable of providing transportation to/from schoo as well as before/after school care.

No advantage either side.

So again, what's the time split? What time/days does dad have the kiddo?

 

[SimplyMom]

They share custody 50/50 on a week-on/week-off basis. Custody is transferred Friday evenings.

Just curious, why would it be better for him not to attend school with his step sister?

 

[Ohiogal]

They share custody 50/50 on a week-on/week-off basis. Custody is transferred Friday evenings.

Just curious, why would it be better for him not to attend school with his step sister?

Why do you think his STEP SISTER matters at all? Because she doesn't. She means NOTHING to the situation. She is YOUR child. NOT his sibling that is taken into consideration. Why should she matter?

 

[SimplyMom]

Why do you think his STEP SISTER matters at all? Because she doesn't. She means NOTHING to the situation. She is YOUR child. NOT his sibling that is taken into consideration. Why should she matter?

Soon she will be his adopted sister, will that change anything? They have grown up together for the past 3 1/2 years.

Researching past case law in Alaska step-siblings have been a consideration when deciding custody arrangements.

Why would them attending school together be considered detrimental?

 

[Ohiogal]

Soon she will be his adopted sister, will that change anything? They have grown up together for the past 3 1/2 years.

Researching past case law in Alaska step-siblings have been a consideration when deciding custody arrangements.

Why would them attending school together be considered detrimental?

SHE does NOT matter to this situation. She is not part of the custody between mom and dad. Your husband may be adopting her but tha tmatters not. They have grown up together? No they haven't. They can still visit. Why is it in the child's best interests to go to school with stepsister? That is the appropriate question. Dad needs to prove that.

 

[SimplyMom]

SHE does NOT matter to this situation. She is not part of the custody between mom and dad. Your husband may be adopting her but tha tmatters not. They have grown up together? No they haven't. They can still visit. Why is it in the child's best interests to go to school with stepsister? That is the appropriate question. Dad needs to prove that.

Thank you, I do understand Dad's burden of proof on that one.

I do not understand, however, why it would be a negative for them to attend school together.

On a (slightly) side note: My step son has no full-siblings and never will, but he does have half-siblings and step-siblings on both sides (although he doesn't live with the ones on his mother's side). Is there any point when those relationships will be a consideration?

 

[SimplyMom]

Of course it will.

But whatever. I know from experience that 50/50 is just fine even given a distance of an hour or so, if the parents WANT it to work.

The distance for the Friday transfer is not an issue for my husband, but is an issue for his ex. Driving 45-60 minutes for pick up twice a month is not a hardship.

However, with the increased distance and travel time, the child would have to sit through that 2x daily on school days in order to be transported back and forth.

So, looking back at it, that could be grounds for a modification of custody.