childs privacy

[californiamom3]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? CA
Kiddo is 16 years old. NCP is angry that I look at emails and/or texts between the two. Kiddo doesn't like it but knows that I do and we often discuss emails and such. NCP continues to discuss visitation (with kiddo) and tries to persuade kiddo into non-supervised visits amongst other things.
Question: Do I have the legal right to look at kiddos emails and/or texts?

 

[Isis1]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? CA
Kiddo is 16 years old. NCP is angry that I look at emails and/or texts between the two. Kiddo doesn't like it but knows that I do and we often discuss emails and such. NCP continues to discuss visitation (with kiddo) and tries to persuade kiddo into non-supervised visits amongst other things.
Question: Do I have the legal right to look at kiddos emails and/or texts?

without looking at the back history, i'm too groogy at the moment, does dad have supervised visitation? does he exercise it?

 

[Antigone*]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? CA
Kiddo is 16 years old. NCP is angry that I look at emails and/or texts between the two. Kiddo doesn't like it but knows that I do and we often discuss emails and such. NCP continues to discuss visitation (with kiddo) and tries to persuade kiddo into non-supervised visits amongst other things.
Question: Do I have the legal right to look at kiddos emails and/or texts?

The standard response to my teen was this: I own the air that you breathe.". I checked emails, surfing history, cell phone logs, backpacks, drawers, under the bed, pockets EVERYTHING if I ever felt I needed to do so.

If kiddo doesn't want to allow you access to emails, make the computer disappear. You have a duty to protect the child, you can't do your duty if you are not informed. You are keeping tabs and the kiddo and there is absodanglutely illegal about it.

Take care

 

[californiamom3]

Dad has once a week supervised visitation, family counseling, once a month drug testing, anger management and N/A attendance...all court ordered.
Dad was absent for 5 years with little contact.
I have allowed email contact, nothing in any orders regarding email contact with kids. Dad is not allowed to phone kids or my home. Kids are to initiate phone contact.
Dad has has exercised 3 out of 5 supervised visits.

 

[LdiJ]

Dad has once a week supervised visitation, family counseling, once a month drug testing, anger management and N/A attendance...all court ordered.
Dad was absent for 5 years with little contact.
I have allowed email contact, nothing in any orders regarding email contact with kids. Dad is not allowed to phone kids or my home. Kids are to initiate phone contact.
Dad has has exercised 3 out of 5 supervised visits.

Then you have every right to read her emails.

If dad was not on supervised visitation, but had been a regular parent to the children all along, then it would have been totally inappropriate for you to read emails between the child and dad.

However in this instance, you not only have the right to read them, but absolutely should.

 

[stealth2]

Then you have every right to read her emails.

If dad was not on supervised visitation, but had been a regular parent to the children all along, then it would have been totally inappropriate for you to read emails between the child and dad.

However in this instance, you not only have the right to read them, but absolutely should.

Ditto this.

I monitor my kids' email. I'm not intrusive about it and I don't read every blessed email, but I do spot checks. Except mail from their Dad (which they sometimes share) - but my situation is different from this one. In your situation, I would be reading his, too.

 

[californiamom3]

Thank you for confirming.

 

[respectthedad]

The standard response to my teen was this: I own the air that you breathe.". I checked emails, surfing history, cell phone logs, backpacks, drawers, under the bed, pockets EVERYTHING if I ever felt I needed to do so.

If kiddo doesn't want to allow you access to emails, make the computer disappear. You have a duty to protect the child, you can't do your duty if you are not informed. You are keeping tabs and the kiddo and there is absodanglutely illegal about it.

Take care

No nothing illegal but can I ask.... were u looking for something or just being curious?

 

[Antigone*]

No nothing illegal but can I ask.... were u looking for something or just being curious?

It really depended, dad, on how she was doing. The computer in our home is never "private" for the kids - EVER

 

[respectthedad]

It really depended, dad, on how she was doing. The computer in our home is never "private" for the kids - EVER

Just pray they dont learn how to delete the history. My motherinlaw taught me that.

 

[LdiJ]

No nothing illegal but can I ask.... were u looking for something or just being curious?

The father in this case has been awol for 5 years (his choice..and unless I am mixing him up with someone else he actually left the country), and has just reentered the children's life. He is on supervised visitation and any communication outside of the supervised visits is supposed to be initiated by the children only...per the court order.

Dad has been, very inappropriately, pressuring the children, particularly the oldest, to end the supervised visitation and to violate other provisions of the court orders...in other words, involving the children in legal matters, which is a huge no-no.

Mom is not ordered to allow email communication between dad and the children, but she has chosen to allow it. She is monitoring it due to the inappropriate natures of dad's discussions with the children.

 

[californiamom3]

The father in this case has been awol for 5 years (his choice..and unless I am mixing him up with someone else he actually left the country), and has just reentered the children's life. He is on supervised visitation and any communication outside of the supervised visits is supposed to be initiated by the children only...per the court order.

Dad has been, very inappropriately, pressuring the children, particularly the oldest, to end the supervised visitation and to violate other provisions of the court orders...in other words, involving the children in legal matters, which is a huge no-no.

Mom is not ordered to allow email communication between dad and the children, but she has chosen to allow it. She is monitoring it due to the inappropriate natures of dad's discussions with the children.

You are 100% spot on.
I don't look at mails because I have a lack of trust with my daughter. In fact when he does write about visitation she never responds to that part of the email. Even my 10 year old told him on the phone today, "Dad, were not supposed to talk about that stuff!"