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Temporary Custody and Support

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Abundant1

Junior Member
What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? Kentucky

My husband and I have been separated for 3 months, we filed no papers, I moved out to set up housekeeping, and because I would be unstable for a while, I left the children with him, he has home, food, car to get them to school, etc.

He has refused to let me see the children, but the last time I tried, he told me that he has filed for divorce. I have not been served yet. I know i can file for temporary custody to ensure that I have visitations, and for temporary support during those visitations.

To file for temporary custody and support, I need to reply to his petition for divorce, but I don't want to let him know where I am staying, how do get the forms, how do I get the court to set up a temporary visitation schedule? who do I talk to? Where do I get the forms, etc?

Thjanks for any help. I am still working on getting a place that is suitable for kids, I have NOT abandoned my children.
 


Zigner

Senior Member, Non-Attorney
What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? Kentucky

My husband and I have been separated for 3 months, we filed no papers, I moved out to set up housekeeping, and because I would be unstable for a while, I left the children with him, he has home, food, car to get them to school, etc.

He has refused to let me see the children, but the last time I tried, he told me that he has filed for divorce. I have not been served yet. I know i can file for temporary custody to ensure that I have visitations, and for temporary support during those visitations.

To file for temporary custody and support, I need to reply to his petition for divorce, but I don't want to let him know where I am staying, how do get the forms, how do I get the court to set up a temporary visitation schedule? who do I talk to? Where do I get the forms, etc?

Thjanks for any help. I am still working on getting a place that is suitable for kids, I have NOT abandoned my children.
You left the children with the father and, per your own admission, YOU are the one who is unstable. You should be paying HIM support. Furthermore, it's quite likely that the father of the children will end up being the one with custody and you having visitation. Lucky for you, visitation and child support are separate matters. So, when you ignore the CS order, you should still be able to visit with the children.
 

Abundant1

Junior Member
You left the children with the father and, per your own admission, YOU are the one who is unstable. You should be paying HIM support. Furthermore, it's quite likely that the father of the children will end up being the one with custody and you having visitation. Lucky for you, visitation and child support are separate matters. So, when you ignore the CS order, you should still be able to visit with the children.
Zigner, I appreciate your speedy reply, however my question is not about who should pay what, but rather, how do I reply to the divorce petition, and request a hearing to determine temporary custody and support.

There is no question about my current situation being unstable, and unsuitable for children, and I feel it is in the best interest of the children if they stay with their father until I can get on my feet, as I am staying with friends, and some of them I don't know well enough to have my children around.

The issue at hand is that he is not letting me see the kids at all, and very rarely even letting me talk to them on the phone. He is telling everyone that I abandoned them, because he is a vindictive, mean person. Getting set up on my own has been difficult, becuase he sabotages me every chance he gets. I want to see my kids, but I don't want to be married to a control freak anymore. WHen I left and took the kids in the past, It became apparent that I needed more stability to properly care for them, as they are 3 and 5.

Now, would someone please give me some information as to who I would contact? The court that has the divorce petition? The department of childrens affairs? What does the request need to say? that I"m requesting a hearing to determine a temporary visitation schedule?
 

Proserpina

Senior Member
What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? Kentucky

My husband and I have been separated for 3 months, we filed no papers, I moved out to set up housekeeping, and because I would be unstable for a while, I left the children with him, he has home, food, car to get them to school, etc.

He has refused to let me see the children, but the last time I tried, he told me that he has filed for divorce. I have not been served yet. I know i can file for temporary custody to ensure that I have visitations, and for temporary support during those visitations.

To file for temporary custody and support, I need to reply to his petition for divorce, but I don't want to let him know where I am staying, how do get the forms, how do I get the court to set up a temporary visitation schedule? who do I talk to? Where do I get the forms, etc?

Thjanks for any help. I am still working on getting a place that is suitable for kids, I have NOT abandoned my children.
As Zigner said Dad stands a very good chance of retaining custody - even temporarily - and having you pay child support. Out of interest why do you not wish to inform him of your address? Because he WILL have the right to know where his children are if you have visitation....

There are many KY forms here: Kentucky: Court of Justice - Forms Library by Category

If you google your county and "pro se divorce" you may find something locally too.

Quite honestly though Dad is holding the cards here - you would perhaps want to consider negotiating with Dad.
 

Abundant1

Junior Member
As Zigner said Dad stands a very good chance of retaining custody - even temporarily - and having you pay child support. Out of interest why do you not wish to inform him of your address? Because he WILL have the right to know where his children are if you have visitation....

There are many KY forms here: Kentucky: Court of Justice - Forms Library by Category

If you google your county and "pro se divorce" you may find something locally too.

Quite honestly though Dad is holding the cards here - you would perhaps want to consider negotiating with Dad.
Well, thank you for an honest diplomatic and helpful answer. I don't want my ex to know where I'm staying because he likes to cause trouble, and I don't need the police called. (he and his family would love to find a reason to have me put in jail, since I had him put in jail for putting his hands on me, they are just mean people)

I understand that he has the upper hand right now, but I don't plan on being in this situation long. I've already taken strides to get a place of my own, all I need is a little time and money. THe money, I've got that under control, but the time, that's a different story.

I"m Ok with him having custody temporarily, becuase I need to spend my time earning, and not having to deal with him. (I've been trying to leave WITH the kids for several years, he's made it impossible) but I don't intend at all for him to retain custody. I'm doing everything in my power to see that he doesn't. I've never kept the kids from him, though.

Anyway, thanks for asking, and thanks for the links.
 

Proserpina

Senior Member
Well, thank you for an honest diplomatic and helpful answer. I don't want my ex to know where I'm staying because he likes to cause trouble, and I don't need the police called. (he and his family would love to find a reason to have me put in jail, since I had him put in jail for putting his hands on me, they are just mean people)
Regardless, if you do have visitation Dad has the right to know where his children are.

I understand that he has the upper hand right now, but I don't plan on being in this situation long. I've already taken strides to get a place of my own, all I need is a little time and money. THe money, I've got that under control, but the time, that's a different story.

I"m Ok with him having custody temporarily, becuase I need to spend my time earning, and not having to deal with him. (I've been trying to leave WITH the kids for several years, he's made it impossible) but I don't intend at all for him to retain custody. I'm doing everything in my power to see that he doesn't. I've never kept the kids from him, though.

Anyway, thanks for asking, and thanks for the links.
What you need to realize is that the longer Dad has temporary custody, the less likely it is that you will be able to regain custody - period.

He's obviously NOT unfit...and frankly he has just as much right to be the custodial parent as you do.
 

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