Do I Get full custody if the father of my son and I are not married!

[kelso660]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? California

Hello,

I live in Sacramento Ca, I had my son in 2007 in Kirkland, Washington were I grew up, His father and I are not married, I did put his name on the birth certificate and my son has his last name! When he was 4 months old we moved to Sacramento. We have been here for over 2 years now and his father and I are on the verge of breaking up. If that happens I am moving back home to Washington, My father told me that because we are not married and we were not married when I had my son, that I atuomaticaly get full coustdy, Is that true? I want to be safer than sorry and I love my son, His father dosent spend any real time with him and really cannot stand him, Its sad! I just need to know if i would get full custody of my son!

 

[ecmst12]

Only until he files in court for custody and visitation. If you move out of the area, he COULD file in court and order you to bring the child back.

 

[LdiJ]

Only until he files in court for custody and visitation. If you move out of the area, he COULD file in court and order you to bring the child back.

That's poor wording because dad cannot order anything at all. Dad can file for custody/parenting time etc., and try to convince a judge to order her to return the child to the jurisdiction.

 

[Proserpina]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? California

Hello,

I live in Sacramento Ca, I had my son in 2007 in Kirkland, Washington were I grew up, His father and I are not married, I did put his name on the birth certificate and my son has his last name! When he was 4 months old we moved to Sacramento. We have been here for over 2 years now and his father and I are on the verge of breaking up. If that happens I am moving back home to Washington, My father told me that because we are not married and we were not married when I had my son, that I atuomaticaly get full coustdy, Is that true? I want to be safer than sorry and I love my son, His father dosent spend any real time with him and really cannot stand him, Its sad! I just need to know if i would get full custody of my son!

Please read OhioGAL's post ...the one about it not being about us, as parents.

 

[Ohiogal]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? California

Hello,

I live in Sacramento Ca, I had my son in 2007 in Kirkland, Washington were I grew up, His father and I are not married, I did put his name on the birth certificate and my son has his last name

Actually the child's father signed the affidavit of paternity and a decision was made for the child to have his FATHER'S last name.

When he was 4 months old we moved to Sacramento. We have been here for over 2 years now and his father and I are on the verge of breaking up. If that happens I am moving back home to Washington, My father told me that because we are not married and we were not married when I had my son, that I atuomaticaly get full coustdy, Is that true?

No it is not true that you will automatically get full custody. It is true that since you were unwed when the child was born that you are the child's only legal custodian at this point. However, when and if dad goes to court, you and he will stand equal before the court and both have the same opportunity for custody. Custody nowadays leans towards JOINT physical and JOINT legal because it is about the CHILD and NOT about the parents who tend to act like children fighting over a toy.

I want to be safer than sorry and I love my son, His father dosent spend any real time with him and really cannot stand him, Its sad!

Really? The boyfriend who you are STILL involved with cannot stand his own child and yet you are ONLY on the "verge" of breaking up with him? Seriously? Says a lot about a) you projecting your own feelings, b) your lack of parenting ability and neglect of your child and/or c) your hope to alienate the father from the child and vice versa.

I just need to know if i would get full custody of my son!

Jeez. The crystal ball was stolen. Probably by a parent who thought that it was another of their toys and took the "mine mine mine" philosophy a bit too far.

No one here can tell you that you will be awarded full custody. What can be stated is that it is NOT about you. Custody is about the child and not about the adults. Why? Because SOMEONE has to look out for the child -- and normally in custody situations it is not the parents because they are too busy looking out for themselves.