quick question

[LdiJ]

I said - note the underlined:



You said:



I responded:



Your reply:



See where I'm going with this? Dad is/was married to Mom - if Dad applies via the Embassy, the Embassy WILL consider him as having parental responsibility regardless of his being separated and/or divorced. The fact that kiddo was born in the US really doesn't come into it - by virtue of Dad's UK citizenship that side of it is pretty much a done deal. Now had they NOT been married it may have made something of a difference depending on when the child was born (as nothing is 100% guaranteed I can't discount it completely)..

Again, then the advice that I would give mom is to allow no visitation outside of her presence until something can be done to ensure that dad cannot abscond to the UK with the child.

I don't like giving that advice...not one bit. However, based on what you are saying I cannot give any other.

 

[Proserpina]

Again, then the advice that I would give mom is to allow no visitation outside of her presence until something can be done to ensure that dad cannot abscond to the UK with the child.

I don't like giving that advice...not one bit. However, based on what you are saying I cannot give any other.

I'm actually in agreement - in this situation I really do think that Mom needs to be very, very careful.

I do want to try and find a way for Mom to at least put the Embassy on notice - it may not be feasible or effective but I want to have a look anyway. OP, hang tight please!

And please note that though Dad may be able to obtain a passport this does NOT give him permission to actually take the child without lawfully being able to do so. I just wanted to make that clear.

 

[scaredmom79]

wow..ok so I just got back on and am completely blown away by all of this. I do not in my heart believe that he would do all of this, first of all he is too lazy to apply for necessary paperwork... and that sadly is not a joke, however, I've been very wrong about him before(obviously). I'm going to start tomorrow filling out all paperwork necessary to get me primary physical custody in order to ensure that he can't take her. I know for a fact that he will not visit with her in my presence as just getting him to visit WITHOUT the presence of his girlfriend has been a HUGE battle. And she will not let him see me for more then a few minutes at a time. ridiculous. anyway, I find it so sad that this is what my marriage and our shared parenthood has come to. I'd much rather have this heads up though then to be taken by surprise later.

 

[Proserpina]

wow..ok so I just got back on and am completely blown away by all of this. I do not in my heart believe that he would do all of this, first of all he is too lazy to apply for necessary paperwork... and that sadly is not a joke, however, I've been very wrong about him before(obviously). I'm going to start tomorrow filling out all paperwork necessary to get me primary physical custody in order to ensure that he can't take her. I know for a fact that he will not visit with her in my presence as just getting him to visit WITHOUT the presence of his girlfriend has been a HUGE battle. And she will not let him see me for more then a few minutes at a time. ridiculous. anyway, I find it so sad that this is what my marriage and our shared parenthood has come to. I'd much rather have this heads up though then to be taken by surprise later.

OP, the last thing L or I would want is for you to worry too much (at this point) about this passport issue - while it's important information I think I can speak for us both when I say that the last thing we want is for you to panic unnecessarily

 

[scaredmom79]

well thank you for the information and the advice. I truly appreciate it.

 

[ProSeDadinMD]

Ok, I see a lot of "He could...", "He Might...", and "I was told by (some person other than Dad)..." about Dad could possibly take the child and "abscond" to Scotland(or other destination as yet undetermined).

Has Dad ever actually threatened to take the child to another country, or on a vist for that matter, and not return? I didn't see that in this thread or your previous thread.

If not, I am going to say this advice:

However, if that is really true then the only advice that I can give mom is to allow no visitation outside of her presence until something is done to ensure that the father cannot abscond with the child to the UK.

is just asking for trouble to start where you don't have it now. No reason at all for what amounts to "supervised visitation" for Dad. After all from his perspective, you "could", "might", etc go back to Florida at any time. I mean you've only been in MA since October(please not that it's November as this is written).

 

[scaredmom79]

He has never threatened to take her out of the country, he has threatened to keep her. He has also lied EXTENSIVELY about other things....I would ask him not to put her in a situation, he would agree and tell me no worries, then do it anyway etc. I don't truly believe, as I said before, that he would take her out of the country, mostly I'm concerned about him not giving her back to me. I don't believe though that keeping her from him because of a fear I have is the wisest choice either. I just want as much info as possible so I can be forwarned and aware of possible problems.

 

[scaredmom79]

Hi all...so I brought the girls to see him last night and when I went back to pick them up he started screaming all sorts of nasty things at me..including saying that i only want kids for child support. Now mind you, I've barely gotten anything from this jerk and we will be having cs court as soon as the state contacts us. My question is can I offer to drop cs if he signs off on his rights? I would much rather have a drama free life where the girls don't hear and see all this nastiness then the money.

 

[haiku]

The state of Massachusetts will not let your soon to be ex, sign off his rights to the children.

The state will always consider both parents responsible for the childrens welfare.

At this point, you need to get the ball rolling on custody and visitation sooner rather than later.