Nana going against Parental wishes

[Proserpina]

(and if it is a bedroom activity, why exactly does Gramma have photos of OP dressed up? )

 

[Rushia]

I'm sorry? Where on earth did that come from?!

The reality is this: you can have the biggest, baddest court order in the world signed by Oprah herself (who does appear to, at times, have more influence than anyone else) and STILL the parents will not be able to stop Gramma from talking. Yes, we're both aware that many parents have such clauses - and we're both also aware that enforcing this is nigh on impossible.

The ONLY way this will be stopped is if one or both stop taking the kids to Gramma's house. That's the reality.



You and I disagree on this one - but this isn't a surprise. We've had this discussion

I see a very big difference.



Ditto previous response.

It comes from the fact that if Dad gets a GAL assigned to the children and they repeat the "pervert" convo's, there's dad's proof. And just to add...Oprah has no power over me as I don't like her.

I don't recall ever having a discussion IRL or otherwise with anyone regarding my sex life or my opinion. I was just as disgusted with that stepmom as anyone else. I see no difference. It's his sex life and he's entitled to it.

Do any of you stop to think that your "age appropriate" discussions emphasis that we should tolerate different people. My mother taught me that PEOPLE fall in love with PEOPLE. Not 2 men, not 2 women...just people and all people deserve to be treated EQUALLY. I will add that I have had many types of friends...straight, gay, bisexual, lesbian and 99% percent of those people told me that they hate the "tolerance" discussions. Children are being indoctorined to believe that they have to "like and tolerate" anyone of a different sexual persuasion that they are. The parents are in the belief that they are so open minded when in reality are they are doing is emphasizing the difference of lesbians and gay people.

 

[Rushia]

(and if it is a bedroom activity, why exactly does Gramma have photos of OP dressed up? )

LOL, I only have 2 guesses. Halloween or she got them from the mom. He does mention that they are a little "risky".

 

[Proserpina]

LOL, I only have 2 guesses. Halloween or she got them from the mom. He does mention that they are a little "risky".

You've actually given me something to think about, Rushia - and all I can do is thank you for that

(Um..I mean with your previous post..... )

 

[Rushia]

You've actually given me something to think about, Rushia - and all I can do is thank you for that

(Um..I mean with your previous post..... )

I really don't mean to argue. I like you. I just don't see it the same way that you all do. I resent society TELLING (not yelling at you) that I HAVE to teach my children these things.

Then I look around at teens having sex and babies. I look at all the teens who declare that they are gay/lesbian/bisexual and PROUD of it and people BETTER bow down to their preference.

Then I look at my son, who is at an age that he does have to be told about sex. His maturity level isn't ready though and I KNOW it, but I HAVE to because society demands it. I don't think all the "knowledgeable" children should be the ones telling or showing him.

and PS. I called you Dog cause that is your former name, right? Or did I get someone confused with all the name changing going on?

 

[Proserpina]

I really don't mean to argue. I like you. I just don't see it the same way that you all do. I resent society TELLING (not yelling at you) that I HAVE to teach my children these things.

Then I look around at teens having sex and babies. I look at all the teens who declare that they are gay/lesbian/bisexual and PROUD of it and people BETTER bow down to their preference.

Then I look at my son, who is at an age that he does have to be told about sex. His maturity level isn't ready though and I KNOW it, but I HAVE to because society demands it. I don't think all the "knowledgeable" children should be the ones telling or showing him.

and PS. I called you Dog cause that is your former name, right? Or did I get someone confused with all the name changing going on?

(yes, it's me...shhhhhhhh )

You do make a very good point there actually - equal rights should actually be equal.

 

[Rushia]

(yes, it's me...shhhhhhhh )

You do make a very good point there actually - equal rights should actually be equal.

I will take the secret to my grave.

You can blame my DH. I never paid attention to anything political in any way, shape or form until he showed up. He's very verbal in his opinion. You should see it...a soapbox appears under his feet and everything!

 

[Isis1]

i'm still on the fence about this. OP didn't mention it was a sexual issue. just because OP dresses up in woman's clothes, doesn't make him gay. some men do it for the income it brings in. same as some women. it doesn't HAVE to mean sex.

grandma telling kiddo about any purple BOB was inappropriate. bottom line. regardless if it was about mom OR dad. it's on MOM to do something about it.

so this isn't really about granny keeping her mouth shut. it's about mom telling grandma to keep her mouth shut or she will leave with the kiddes until she does.

 

[happybug]

OP NEVER said he was gay and most men who cross dress in private are straight. This was something PRIVATE between OP and his Ex- wife in the privacy of their bedroom. The first problem was the EX told her mommy about her sex life during the divorce and now Granny is milking it and using private information as a weapon.

Could someone PLEASE explain to me why a man could have problems in court if his wife teaches the children to call their Mother a "Bitch" but it seems quite alright for a woman to allow her Mommy to teach the children to call their father a "Pervert"? They are both quite offensive terms and should be terms 6 year children should not even think of calling a parent. Some of you seem to believe that Dad is a "Pervert" so it is OK that Granny is telling his kids that. That he should just sit them down and explain what he enjoys sexually, in kid friendly terms of course. So, what if Mom is actually a "Bitch". Would that make it OK for step-mom to teach her kids to call her that?

 

[LdiJ]

OP NEVER said he was gay and most men who cross dress in private are straight. This was something PRIVATE between OP and his Ex- wife in the privacy of their bedroom. The first problem was the EX told her mommy about her sex life during the divorce and now Granny is milking it and using private information as a weapon.

Could someone PLEASE explain to me why a man could have problems in court if his wife teaches the children to call their Mother a "Bitch" but it seems quite alright for a woman to allow her Mommy to teach the children to call their father a "Pervert"? They are both quite offensive terms and should be terms 6 year children should not even think of calling a parent. Some of you seem to believe that Dad is a "Pervert" so it is OK that Granny is telling his kids that. That he should just sit them down and explain what he enjoys sexually, in kid friendly terms of course. So, what if Mom is actually a "Bitch". Would that make it OK for step-mom to teach her kids to call her that?

Here is the problem. If is proven that a stepparent or new significant other is doing these kinds of things, judges can sometimes be reluctant to issue restraining orders, but for the most part, they will.

However, when its a grandparent, and the only proof is what the children state, then judges seem not to want to issue restraining orders against the grandparent. I think its the whole blood relative thing. Its hard to get them to issue a restraining order against a grandparent in the same manner that its hard to get them to issue a restraining order against a parent...particularly if both parents aren't on board with that.

Unless mom were to agree to cut grandma off too...there really isn't anything that dad can do except try to take the wind out of grandma's sails.

 

[Rushia]

Here is the problem. If is proven that a stepparent or new significant other is doing these kinds of things, judges can sometimes be reluctant to issue restraining orders, but for the most part, they will.

However, when its a grandparent, and the only proof is what the children state, then judges seem not to want to issue restraining orders against the grandparent. I think its the whole blood relative thing. Its hard to get them to issue a restraining order against a grandparent in the same manner that its hard to get them to issue a restraining order against a parent...particularly if both parents aren't on board with that.

Unless mom were to agree to cut grandma off too...there really isn't anything that dad can do except try to take the wind out of grandma's sails.

I still think dad should fight this cause we still fall back to the children. Should a 5 and 6 year old know what their father likes to do in the bedroom? Would you really sit down a child that young and tell them that you like to be whipped/beaten anything (just using examples, not specifically saying that you do)?

 

[ecmst12]

OK education first.

A TRANSVESTITE is someone who likes to cross-dress for sexual excitement. As mentioned, most are straight men. They do not want to be women or dress like women in public, for the most part, it's only a bedroom activity.

A TRANSSEXUAL is someone whose psychological gender does not match up with their physical anatomy. Those are the people who attempt to live as the opposite gender in public and who may want an operation. HUGE HUGE difference.

So, OP IS in fact a transvestite, and it is in fact a private issue and it's unfortunate that grandma knows about it and is using it against him with the children. But the answer is not stopping grandma from seeing the children, since you do NOT have the legal right or power to do this. The answer is teaching your children a simple phrase: "It's not nice when you say mean things about daddy."