Lucie's thread

[Proserpina]

My first marriage was not a good one by any means, there was constant cheating and abuse of all kinds from my husband. I married him because I was pregnant with his baby. During our marriage, he would leave me on a regular basis and for a long time I would just wait for him to come home (for months at times). Well, when he left me when my oldest daughter had cancer and started sleeping with all my friends, I went back to the father of my first child. I ended up getting pregnant with the man who wasn't my husband....and eventually, I ended up going back to my husband, He said that he had to be on the birth certificate because we were married. Well eventually, after the same patterns continued with my husband, I left him again. I went back to the father of (now 2) my children. I ended up getting pregnant again, this time however, I left both my husband, and the father of most of my children. I got an apartment, and divorced my husband.... I lived by myself for almost two years. My (now ex) husband and I started talking more and more, and I (stupidly) moved back in with him. Which lasted about a year. I know I have made a lot of idiotic choices in my life...But I am now re-married, and I have been for almost 3 years and we have been together for four. Now my ex husband decides to try and get custody of all but my oldest child. We are going through a VERY nasty custody battle, and I am worried about my children. The father of 3 of my children hasn't even been notified by my ex husband of anything at all, I have been telling him what is going on. My lawyer doesn't seem to be all that great, but he is what I can afford. As of right now, my ex husband has gotten rights to all (except my oldest) of my children. And their father (without even being notified in ANY way) is not allowed to see his own children .
you don't know me or my children....All of my kids are excellent students, and have GREAT communication with me, even my 15 year old....I am only interested in laws

So let's see...

 

[Proserpina]

Please give a timeline.

The marriages, the ages of the children, the whole caboodle.

 

[CJane]

Sounds to me like Lucie is using the word "father" to apply to both the LEGAL and BIOLOGICAL fathers of these children, without understanding that biology matters not in most cases.

 

[Banned_Princess]

OK, I'll give it a go.

My first marriage was not a good one by any means, there was constant cheating and abuse of all kinds from my husband. I married him because I was pregnant with his baby.

Brilliant reason to marry someone. So, this is baby 1,the only child you had naturally with your husband.

During our marriage, he would leave me on a regular basis and for a long time I would just wait for him to come home (for months at times). Well, when he left me when my oldest daughter had cancer and started sleeping with all my friends, I went back to the father of my first child.

See... so, I don't get this, I thought we were talking about the father of the first child, and the first child.

I ended up getting pregnant with the man who wasn't my husband....and eventually, I ended up going back to my husband, He said that he had to be on the birth certificate because we were married.

Technically it is his baby because you were married.

Well eventually, after the same patterns continued with my husband, I left him again. I went back to the father of (now 2) my children. I ended up getting pregnant again, this time however, I left both my husband, and the father of most of my children. I got an apartment, and divorced my husband....

When you divorced him, what did the child custody agreement come out to be.

I lived by myself for almost two years. My (now ex) husband and I started talking more and more, and I (stupidly) moved back in with him. Which lasted about a year.

which guy is this, I guess it doesn't matter, he is the father of the kids you conceived and gave birth to while legally married.

I know I have made a lot of idiotic choices in my life...But I am now re-married, and I have been for almost 3 years and we have been together for four.

Dad of kids 5 and six?

Now my ex husband decides to try and get custody of all but my oldest child.

The one with cancer. Who is the father of the first kid. I thought it was the husband, but even after the life story, I am still not clear.

We are going through a VERY nasty custody battle, and I am worried about my children. The father of 3 of my children hasn't even been notified by my ex husband of anything at all,

So the only natural child of the husband, is the first, and he doesn't want her.

I have been telling him what is going on. My lawyer doesn't seem to be all that great, but he is what I can afford. As of right now

He doesn't have to be great, he has to be competent. and he doesn't appear to care that you had 3 kids with a man who wasn't your husband and doesn't think the natural dad needs to be notified, OR he would have brought him into the mess.

my ex husband has gotten rights to all (except my oldest) of my children.

Of course he did, he is the legal dad of the kids, since they were born while he was married to you.

And their father (without even being notified in ANY way) is not allowed to see his own children .

Maybe he shouldn't have had kids with a married woman. (sex with a married woman)

you don't know me or my children....All of my kids are excellent students, and have GREAT communication with me,

I'm glad, but it doesn't even matter.

even my 15 year old....I am only interested in laws

Why doesn't the natural father of the children get a lawyer.

 

[JacobJoel]

I'm willing to bet husband one was father of baby two.

and lucy is probably has personal reason to comment on the effects of childhood sexual abuse.

 

[CJane]

and lucy is probably has personal reason to comment on the effects of childhood sexual abuse.

But proving that "exposing" a three year old to porn had any permanent negative impact at all is going to be really difficult. Especially without knowing what that "exposure" consisted of.

 

[Proserpina]

But proving that "exposing" a three year old to porn had any permanent negative impact at all is going to be really difficult. Especially without knowing what that "exposure" consisted of.

Agreed. There are some details left out here which may prove to be critical.

 

[Ohiogal]

But proving that "exposing" a three year old to porn had any permanent negative impact at all is going to be really difficult. Especially without knowing what that "exposure" consisted of.

What will have more of an impact on the child is seeing mommy lucie being loosey goosey with who she shacks up and beds and playing musical men between more than one. She may be picky about what she lets the child watch on television but she is not picky about who she lets into her bed and impregnate her. Hence her issues.

 

[Proserpina]

What will have more of an impact on the child is seeing mommy lucie being loosey goosey with who she shacks up and beds and playing musical men between more than one. She may be picky about what she lets the child watch on television but she is not picky about who she lets into her bed and impregnate her. Hence her issues.

Though I did giggle at the phrasing this is an excellent point - these children (no matter which male provided that 50%) need stability, which seems to have been very sadly lacking.

 

[liandrajade]

quite frankly i have no idea in hell what is going on....

she has 4 kids....1 who belongs to the guy she just divorced or is divorcing...the other 3 BIOLOGICALLY belong to ex # 1 but somehow ex #2 got custody of his bio kid AND the 2 that dont belong to him biologically maybe LEGALLY ON PAPER are his??? am i getting this right???

yeeshhh.....

 

[Proserpina]

quite frankly i have no idea in hell what is going on....

she has 4 kids....1 who belongs to the guy she just divorced or is divorcing...the other 3 BIOLOGICALLY belong to ex # 1 but somehow ex #2 got custody of his bio kid AND the 2 that dont belong to him biologically maybe LEGALLY ON PAPER are his??? am i getting this right???

yeeshhh.....

Honey, I have no f'in idea. We're all awaiting Lucie to come back and tell us exactly what happened, when, and with whom

I swear I wrote a short story like this when I was at school...

 

[Banned_Princess]

quite frankly i have no idea in hell what is going on....

she has 4 kids....1 who belongs to the guy she just divorced or is divorcing...the other 3 BIOLOGICALLY belong to ex # 1 but somehow ex #2 got custody of his bio kid AND the 2 that dont belong to him biologically maybe LEGALLY ON PAPER are his??? am i getting this right???

yeeshhh.....

lol, who knows and im sorry i scared her off... maybe had she been more coherent in the issue we could have been more helpfull.

 

[goddessoflubboc]

The best I can figure, dad #1 is bio dad to the oldest kid, and at least legal dad to kid #2. Kid #2 is her oldest daughter I think, who had the cancer.

How she leaves and returns to her first husband in one fell swoop is something all the chardonnay in the world won't clarify for me.

 

[AkersTile]

Goddess~
You figured it out a whole lot better than me. I got:
Dad #1 (not hubby) is father of 1st child
Hubby is father of 2nd child
Dad #1 3rd
Hubby 4th
which is probably still all screwed up but I can't follow soap operas all that well. I did not have nearly enough brain comprehension to understand all of that.

 

[Proserpina]

Goddess~
You figured it out a whole lot better than me. I got:
Dad #1 (not hubby) is father of 1st child
Hubby is father of 2nd child
Dad #1 3rd
Hubby 4th
which is probably still all screwed up but I can't follow soap operas all that well. I did not have nearly enough brain comprehension to understand all of that.

Why am I getting the urge to shout "Oh Luuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuucie....." just to get OP to respond and tell us what exactly is going on?