RE: Religion Do I have any recourse to stop this?

[bridgemom]

RE: Religion Do I have any recourse to stop this?

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)?

Facts:

My daughter's father and I were never married. She is 6 and he sees her a total of 28 hrs during the week. No visitation order, just an agreed upon visitation. Because of that, I have sole legal and physical custody.

He was recently married and his wife is Jewish. I am Christian and my daughter and I go to church every weekend. While he and his wife were dating, he told me that he wanted to take her early so that they could go to his wife's (then girlfriend)family to celebrate the Jewish holidays. I talked with both of them and told them that wasn't something I approved of and could confuse her.

Recently found out that they are still doing it. Obviously having a reasonable conversation didn't work. What are my options? I thought that since I have sole custody that I decided her religion. Am I wrong? Do I have any options here or do I have to let this go?

Thanks in advance for any help...

 

[Zigner]

I would honestly suggest that the father of the child go through the courts to get paternity, visitation and child support set up. That way he can exercise his constitutional right to be a father to his child.

For you...the power you have would be to stop visitation.

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)?

Facts:

My daughter's father and I were never married. She is 6 and he sees her a total of 28 hrs during the week. No visitation order, just an agreed upon visitation. Because of that, I have sole legal and physical custody.

He was recently married and his wife is Jewish. I am Christian and my daughter and I go to church every weekend. While he and his wife were dating, he told me that he wanted to take her early so that they could go to his wife's (then girlfriend)family to celebrate the Jewish holidays. I talked with both of them and told them that wasn't something I approved of and could confuse her.

Recently found out that they are still doing it. Obviously having a reasonable conversation didn't work. What are my options? I thought that since I have sole custody that I decided her religion. Am I wrong? Do I have any options here or do I have to let this go?

Thanks in advance for any help...

 

[stealth2]

Exposing her to other religious faiths does not mean he's choosing a religion for her. It means he's exposing her to another religious faith. And actually, as a Christian, it's not a bad thing to understand Judaism on some, even minimal, basis. 'Cause... ya know... Jesus was a Jew. *gasp*, I know!

And no, it will not confuse her. My kids have been exposed to a variety of Christian and other faiths (Judaism, Islam, Buddhism, to name a few) and they still strongly identify with our Eastern Orthodox faith. Little precious will survive.

 

[frylover]

Does hearing the Bible story of Jesus eating the Passover Meal with his disciples "confuse" her?

I am Catholic and would LOVE the opportunity for my girls and I to attend a "real" Passover meal. I think it would be a wonderful educational experience.

I

 

[stealth2]

Does hearing the Bible story of Jesus eating the Passover Meal with his disciples "confuse" her?

I am Catholic and would LOVE the opportunity for my girls and I to attend a "real" Passover meal. I think it would be a wonderful educational experience.

I

That is one of my regrets... I lived in Israel for ~a year, and we weren't able to go to a seder. However, I have a friend who is Jewish and has no family nearby, so this past December we held a Hannukah dinner with her. She plans do have a seder this spring. I can't wait - and neither can my kids!

I think it's sad when people throw forward their religiosity (of whatever faith it may be) as somehow "better". Which is what you're really doing, OP. Your daughter will be enriched, rather than confused.

 

[Ohiogal]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)?

Facts:

My daughter's father and I were never married. She is 6 and he sees her a total of 28 hrs during the week. No visitation order, just an agreed upon visitation. Because of that, I have sole legal and physical custody.

He was recently married and his wife is Jewish. I am Christian and my daughter and I go to church every weekend. While he and his wife were dating, he told me that he wanted to take her early so that they could go to his wife's (then girlfriend)family to celebrate the Jewish holidays. I talked with both of them and told them that wasn't something I approved of and could confuse her.

Recently found out that they are still doing it. Obviously having a reasonable conversation didn't work. What are my options? I thought that since I have sole custody that I decided her religion. Am I wrong? Do I have any options here or do I have to let this go?

Thanks in advance for any help...

You cannot decide her religion. You can decide on your time to expose her to your religion. That does not mean you dictate her religion. When she is older she can choose her own religion and it may not be yours. Your option is to deny visitation outright -- and realize that dad can then get a court order allowing visitation/custody. A court will NOT dictate that YOU get to choose religion.

 

[bridgemom]

Thank you...good choice of words. Your post(s) did put it in a better perspective for me.

As for the other poster...denying visitation isn't something I would ever do, unless she is in danger-which she isn't. A declaration of parentage was signed at her birth, child support is in place (I guess), and I don't know why he never went to court for visitation. Maybe because he knows I wouldn't deny him his daughter.