School issues

[doc2b]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? MI

Hubby's ex informed him of some poor grades that their daughter is getting in school and that her teacher is recommending summer school (already??). The teacher apparently told mom that after school tutoring would not be necessary, but that summer school should catch her up for next year. Now, to catch you up on the situation, my husband has his court date next month for a change of domicile (was transferred out of state for work, 700 miles away).

Dad has put in emails and calls to the teacher since December (prior to any school reports being recieved), without any return correspondence. He would like to discuss the kids progress, but it's impossible when she won't get back to him. Nobody is arguing that summer school may be necessary, but it seems early to make that decision, especially when after school help is being deemed unnecessary for her. The proposed summer schedule would give whoever doesn't get primary custody about 10 weeks in the summer. This would be impossible if mom gains custody for the school year and summer school is needed.

Since the court date isn't for a month, dad is wondering if he should request after school tutoring anyway in order to try and catch daughter up now, instead of waiting for summer. It makes sense to me to try and address any issues while she's still in school, but I'm not a teacher so I don't know what works out best in the end. My husband's gut tells him that mom may be setting things up so that she gets the kids (at least daughter) over the summer regardless of what the custody decision is. (He feels this way because mom refused to allow him to be a part of the conference between her and the teacher via phone conferencing, which was available). He may be paranoid, but she's tried things like that in the past to him so he's always on guard.

Any ideas what dad should do in this situation?

 

[stealth2]

Dad would be well served to find out what summer school options may be available in HIS area that his daughter could attend, if necessary.

Dad should also find out if grades, etc. are available online. Many schools now offer that, so there is no excuse for any parent not to know how their child is doing when it is.

Is it too early to make that call? Depends on how the school operates and teh age of the child. In our schools, MS and HS both operate on block scheduling (i.e. Instead of 7-8 classes a day all year, they take 4 classes each semester). So as soon as a semester is over, you know if the kid needs to attend summer school for any of those 4 courses.

 

[doc2b]

Dad would be well served to find out what summer school options may be available in HIS area that his daughter could attend, if necessary.

Dad should also find out if grades, etc. are available online. Many schools now offer that, so there is no excuse for any parent not to know how their child is doing when it is.

Is it too early to make that call? Depends on how the school operates and teh age of the child. In our schools, MS and HS both operate on block scheduling (i.e. Instead of 7-8 classes a day all year, they take 4 classes each semester). So as soon as a semester is over, you know if the kid needs to attend summer school for any of those 4 courses.

Stealth-
Never thought to look at summer school here (the curriculum is similar, but not the same...still may work)

Grades aren't available online (only attendance and contact info...and their lunch attendance whatever that's for...). He has great relationships with the para professionals and the principal, but has hesitated to get them involved because he thought maybe the teacher has just been too busy...obviously not too busy to meet with mom, though. He also provided SESEnvelopes for the teachers, which they haven't used. Everything goes to mom and she sends what she wants. Grade report is in the mail right now (via mom), but he won't see it until after midwinter break with the kids.

The kids are both elementary, and don't do a block system like that. it's more of a step system...gets more complicated throughout the year, but same subject areas. Seems silly to me to wait until she's even farther behind to get her help.

Thanks for the suggestion of checking summer school here! (Though I'm hoping that won't be necessary )

 

[proud_parent]

Dad has put in emails and calls to the teacher since December (prior to any school reports being recieved), without any return correspondence.

Then Dad needs to inform the school principal that these requests have gone unanswered. If that does not generate an immediate response from the child's teacher, Dad should take it up with the superintendent of schools.

 

[doc2b]

Then Dad needs to inform the school principal that these requests have gone unanswered. If that does not generate an immediate response from the child's teacher, Dad should take it up with the superintendent of schools.

We all have a trip up there early next month, so he's planning on going in and talking to them all in person...seems like face-to-face is the only way anybody takes this stuff seriously.

 

[profmum]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? MI


Dad has put in emails and calls to the teacher since December (prior to any school reports being recieved), without any return correspondence. He would like to discuss the kids progress, but it's impossible when she won't get back to him.

Dad needs to seriously get a back bone.. he needs to get his ass to the child's school and demand to meet the teacher.

He feels this way because mom refused to allow him to be a part of the conference between her and the teacher via phone conferencing, which was available). He may be paranoid, but she's tried things like that in the past to him so he's always on guard.

I am sorry what the hell kind of excuse is this? Mum won't "let him" be part of the conference so he puts his tail between his legs and slinks away???

He has great relationships with the para professionals and the principal, but has hesitated to get them involved because he thought maybe the teacher has just been too busy...obviously not too busy to meet with mom, though. He also provided SESEnvelopes for the teachers, which they haven't used.

He does not want to "bother" the teachers despite the child's failing grades??
Frankly Dad does not have the motivation or the back bone to do what is right for hs child..all he does is make excuses and despite having a "great relationship" with the principal he can't get the information he needs? sorry more excuses..

 

[profmum]

We all have a trip up there early next month, so he's planning on going in and talking to them all in person...seems like face-to-face is the only way anybody takes this stuff seriously.

Dad wants to now wait an additional month to make the trip to figure out what is going on with his child's grades..he does have priorities and excuses nicely laid out..

 

[doc2b]

Dad wants to now wait an additional month to make the trip to figure out what is going on with his child's grades..he does have priorities and excuses nicely laid out..

It's not an additional month, it's two weeks after school reopens from break. And it's not a matter of wanting to wait...living 700 miles away and not having unlimited funds and a flexible work schedule that allows him to just scoot away for a parent teacher conference doesn't consititute an excuse or screwed up priorities.

Insulting my husband's ability and willingness to do what's right for his kids doesn't effect me. I know better than that.

 

[LdiJ]

It's not an additional month, it's two weeks after school reopens from break. And it's not a matter of wanting to wait...living 700 miles away and not having unlimited funds and a flexible work schedule that allows him to just scoot away for a parent teacher conference doesn't consititute an excuse or screwed up priorities.

Insulting my husband's ability and willingness to do what's right for his kids doesn't effect me. I know better than that.

I agree that your husband is doing the best that he can under the circumstances that he is dealing with.

However, I have reviewed your posting history and I think that its really possible that you are cheerleading your husband down a path that won't come out the way that you hope.

Prior to your move they had almost a 50/50 parenting schedule. The children have now been with mom for quite a long time since the move. I honestly think that without a "smoking gun, mom is unfit" that your husband is going to end up being the NCP.

Therefore I do think that your husband needs to raise holy heck with the children's school to communicate with him, and then needs to find a way to ensure that they get whatever additional educational help that they need in your area, that is approved by their current school, so that he can go into court with a summer plan that ensures that the children will NOT have to attend summer school in their area to properly progress in their schooling.

Its totally doable...it just takes some effort to arrange.