Parental Liability in CA

[Cracklin'Rose]

California

My 17 year old daughter is out of control. Just a couple weeks after returning home from nearly three months in a wilderness therapy program she is already drinking, smoking, doing drugs, stealing money from us, and now she has run away. Needless to say, after living with this behavior (and worse - she takes our vehicles without permission or a driver's license) since she came to live with us a year ago, we are not anxious to have her back home. Yesterday she was caught shoplifting and I asked that rather than me picking her up she be turned over to the police. She was issued a citation and then released. Some of her friends picked her up and she is back to getting high and God know what else.

I'm wondering what our liability would be should she commit another, more serious crime before she is 18. Also, we have not reported her as a runaway. Should we do so? Must we take her into our home if she comes back? She will be 18 in two months. Are there any legal actions we can take to protect ourselves against her as she is violent toward her younger siblings, steals from us and sneaks drugs into our home?

 

[Proserpina]

Wow.

Just....wow.

 

[Cracklin'Rose]

I'm not really sure how to take that response. I should make it clear that she is my step daughter, and only came to live with us last year. She has a history of substance abuse, stealing, fighting, truancy, and bullying that goes back about 5 years. We had the idea that we could turn her around and spent the last year in various kinds of counseling, support groups etc. as well as having her hospitalized and then in the wilderness therapy program I mentioned. We have a family contract and strict rules with very clear consequences which her younger siblings follow without much trouble.

I did a little digging and found out that where we live we can file an incorrigibility petition. I don't really see the point as she is nearly 18 and it is doubtful the process could even be completed before her birthday. I am still worried about liability, however, if she commits crimes before 18. We are willing to place her in an inpatient treatment program but not to have her at home. Unfortunately, in California she must be willing to go to treatment.

 

[stealth2]

The biggest issue you face is that you can do nothing. Please ask her Dad to come speak with us. Thanks.

 

[CdwJava]

I'm wondering what our liability would be should she commit another, more serious crime before she is 18.

In certain instances you maybe held fiscally liable for her actions, yes.

Also, we have not reported her as a runaway. Should we do so?

If she is out of your control and has taken off without your permission or knowledge of her whereabouts, absolutely.

Must we take her into our home if she comes back?

Unless a court removes your husband of all parental rights he is required by law to provide for her.

She will be 18 in two months. Are there any legal actions we can take to protect ourselves against her as she is violent toward her younger siblings, steals from us and sneaks drugs into our home?

When she commits a crime, you call the police. If she hits a sibling, call the cops. If she brings drugs into the home, call the police. When she's 18 open the front door, let her leave, and change the locks.

Hopefully her father - your husband - is on the same page as you are and does not want to keep this miscreant in the home after she's 18.

 

[Cracklin'Rose]

Thanks

Thanks for your responses. We took your advice and reported her as a runaway. When she gets picked up we will place her in a treatment center where she will very likely stay until she is 18. After that, if she signs herself out of treatment she will be on her own. After reading what you wrote I wish now that we would have called police each time she stole our vehicles or snuck out during the night. It's really hard to see your child as a criminal but by protecting her we were really only hurting her in the long run.

 

[CdwJava]

If she had been reported for the prior criminal offenses, it would have been likely she could be on probation and thus made to follow the rules or go to juvenile hall. As it is, if she fals to follow the rules, she gets to come home. That is why I encourage parents to call the cop sand report crimes committed by a child and to report them as a runaway. Eventually things reach critical mass, the child gets before a judge, and they can have the Sword of Damocles hanging over their head. Otherwise, they have no real penalty for their actions.