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>Charlotte<

Lurker
Also, luvisabattle--I realize there's an extremely fine line between "Personal advice from strangers" and "None of your damned business", but in the event that this does turn out to be an unfortunate accident as explained by Dad, I hope you don't get too wrapped up in the "this happened on his watch so it's all his fault" thing. Granted, I have the luxury of objectiveness because it's not my child. But you would be wise to not let your animosity for your ex push you too far in the other direction.

Best of luck to you and your daughter, I hope she feels better and is better very soon. Poor thing must be scared to death.
 


Fyi when there are lacerations on the face they usually bring in a plastic surgeon to do the stitching, to minimize scarring.
Yes he was a platic surgeon and he was able to pull the skin together on her nose and stich (he wasn't sure if he would be able to) and it looked so much better when he was through. He was really great. Her upper lip was really deeply cut, we'll see what happens.
 

Just Blue

Senior Member
I will be honest, I had some concern that perhaps dad was trying to protect someone else. It just didn't seem possible to me that it went down that way.

However, since more than one person here has experienced something similar, I have to accept that its possible
.

OMG!

Put on your parka's folks... I think hell just froze over...lol!!:p:)
 

LdiJ

Senior Member
OMG!

Put on your parka's folks... I think hell just froze over...lol!!:p:)
Hey meanie, I don't care to be disbelieved when I tell someone that something happened to me or someone I am close to. Therefore, I must give anyone else the benefit of the doubt in similar circumstances.
 

Just Blue

Senior Member
That depends a lot on the windshield. Was it original equipment or an aftermarket replacement window? (OEMs are held to higher manufacturing standards than aftermarket suppliers.) Was it installed properly? Was there already a small chip or crack prior to impact? Were there recent temperature fluctuations that would have weakened the glass?
I was thinking the same thing.

I was a Sr. Tech Mgr for a windshield repair manufacture...And I believe that it is VERY possible for a 45 lb object (in this case a child) to "go through" a windshield. WSG is not meant to be break-proof...It is designed to not shatter in sharp shards. 2 layers of glass sandwiching plastic.

And for the member that stated that it takes hitting a deer going 40mph to crack a windshield?? Nope...All it takes is a small stone to cause a crack/star-break/bulls-eye damage. ;)
 

Just Blue

Senior Member
Hey meanie, I don't care to be disbelieved when I tell someone that something happened to me or someone I am close to. Therefore, I must give anyone else the benefit of the doubt in similar circumstances.
I was just kiddin' Hon..:)
 
Also, luvisabattle--I realize there's an extremely fine line between "Personal advice from strangers" and "None of your damned business", but in the event that this does turn out to be an unfortunate accident as explained by Dad, I hope you don't get too wrapped up in the "this happened on his watch so it's all his fault" thing. Granted, I have the luxury of objectiveness because it's not my child. But you would be wise to not let your animosity for your ex push you too far in the other direction.

Best of luck to you and your daughter, I hope she feels better and is better very soon. Poor thing must be scared to death.
To be honest I really want to blame and find retribution because of my feelings for him that originated with watching his reaction to my saying "I'm keeping the baby" almost nine years ago. It was really ugly and he seemed to be a different person instantly.

But your words remind me that we are in the middle of a three year war that if I were honest is probably due largely to my blame. I don't like him and I don't like his choices, it only seems to be getting worse and I probably should have let alot of things go.

I've always felt justified because I felt like I was protecting our daughter, but it's turning out that the conflict between her father and I is what is doing the most harm.

I will try to be objective about this. We are modifying our modified parenting plan in September, and when some of the issues that need to be clarified are finally in black and white, I'm not going to fight it anymore.
 

Ohiogal

Queen Bee
That answers my question about me having her now. I get her on Friday for the weekend, so I can wait until then. It is really hard not being able to be allowed to be the one who is with her. Unbelievably hard.

Someone did make her wear a helmet - which she doesn't like to do so thank God.

CPS told me that the father was willing to go to counseling with his step-son etc and they accepted that. Of course they didnt do the counseling, and the father ended up first sending him to a diciplinary "ranch" in montana for a year and then the boy was sent to live with his maternal grandparents in Arizona where he is now.

Our parenting plan does not allow capital punishment.
The bolded is very good to know. Since that means neither of you can kill your children.
 
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And for the member that stated that it takes hitting a deer going 40mph to crack a windshield?? Nope...All it takes is a small stone to cause a crack/star-break/bulls-eye damage. ;)
That idiot would be me, lol...But since you know more than us, what are the odds of what the dad saying happening really happening?
 

milspecgirl

Senior Member
To be honest I really want to blame and find retribution because of my feelings for him that originated with watching his reaction to my saying "I'm keeping the baby" almost nine years ago. It was really ugly and he seemed to be a different person instantly.

But your words remind me that we are in the middle of a three year war that if I were honest is probably due largely to my blame. I don't like him and I don't like his choices, it only seems to be getting worse and I probably should have let alot of things go.

I've always felt justified because I felt like I was protecting our daughter, but it's turning out that the conflict between her father and I is what is doing the most harm.

I will try to be objective about this. We are modifying our modified parenting plan in September, and when some of the issues that need to be clarified are finally in black and white, I'm not going to fight it anymore.

If only more parents got that thru their heads. As one poster's tag line says- love your kids more than you hate your ex
 
If only more parents got that thru their heads. As one poster's tag line says- love your kids more than you hate your ex
I applaud OP on that, it's easy to lay the blame on everyone but not to look yourself in the mirror and say to yourself what you are doing wrong.
 
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Just Blue

Senior Member
That idiot would be me, lol...But since you know more than us, what are the odds of what the dad saying happening really happening?
Well...Based on the info provided by OP: It's possible. If the child was going fast, hit the front of the car and went flying over the hood helmet first into the WS...I think it's a likely scenario.

Again...This is based on the limited info provided to us from OP.

OP needs to place her child in a bike safety course. ;)
 

LdiJ

Senior Member
Well...Based on the info provided by OP: It's possible. If the child was going fast, hit the front of the car and went flying over the hood helmet first into the WS...I think it's a likely scenario.

Again...This is based on the limited info provided to us from OP.

OP needs to place her child in a bike safety course. ;)
Does anybody else just get the shivers even thinking about it?:(
 

PQN

Member
OP - If you are really ready to reach out an olive branch, thank dad and step-mom for insisting that DD wear her helmet.
 
"But like many have said to do, I'll get the facts (hopefully in a non confrontational way) decide if it needs to be addressed and then concentrait on trying to make this better for her."

now, that sounds much better, remembering that the only indications on the facts you have so far are that the doctor didnt report the injuries were not consistent with a little girl with a bike helmet going thru a vehicle windshield...

Important to keep the open mind -

Important to learn how to keep the open mind in crisis -

Emotions alwasy get mixed up in these things, your reactions have been normal enough and you shouldnt beat yourself up about it...

You can work towards a calm understanding of the facts, and a peaceful resolution in the best interests of the child...

You should avoid blame laying and that let the chips fall where they may attitude...remember at all times that the 'chips' in this case is your child.

You cannot protect her from conflicting schedules and desires, but together you can protect her from conflicting parents... and teach by example how to deal with real life issues.

-
 
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