Trying to strip my parental rights

[AbbaDabba730]

I've been paying for 4 years because it wasn't until 4 years ago that she filed for child support. Ever since that court hearing, I've paid a solid portion of the child support order. I did fail to secure the medical coverage, but that is minute and also she wouldn't give me the social security number.

WHAT? She wouldn't give your dad the #, not you! You couldn't be bothered actually trying to get it yourself.

And oh great father who pays a 'solid portion' of child support, who couln't be bothered to support the child before mom takes you to court

And the great father who couldn't be bothered to see his child, or worry about his 'rights' until he gets wind that the only man this child knows would like to adopt

Yep. You are right, it is all mom's fault

 

[Sparco23]

Are you flipping kidding? You think your VERY YOUNG CHILD not having access to proper medical care is "minute"?? Do you have any concept of the medical issues a little one could have? Cancer? Deadly infections? Broken bones? Will you call the E.R. and tell then that although the child is un-insured they should just consider this a "minute" issue and treat the child anyway?

Moron.

Excuse me? I'm hear for legal advice.

If the support order is for 306 per month...medical insurance is what? 100 a month? I'm paying over 75 percent of the order.

In other words, 24 and some percent can be considered minute.

 

[Artemis_ofthe_Hunt]

I've been paying for 4 years because it wasn't until 4 years ago that she filed for child support. Ever since that court hearing, I've paid a solid portion of the child support order. I did fail to secure the medical coverage, but that is minute and also she wouldn't give me the social security number.

Excuse me? I'm hear for legal advice.

If the support order is for 306 per month...medical insurance is what? 100 a month? I'm paying over 75 percent of the order.

In other words, 24 and some percent can be considered minute.

whooo hooo Are you kidding me????????? $306 a month for child support? That doesn't cover my medical insurance on my CHILD! Let alone daycare, food, clothing and the other various "minute" expenses that come with raising a child.

So you are justifying your own actions in your head as if your dad's actions have anything to do with YOUR OBLIGATION to support your child. Wonderful. Just. Great.

 

[cappadocia]

If the support order is for 306 per month...medical insurance is what? 100 a month? I'm paying over 75 percent of the order.

In other words, 24 and some percent can be considered minute.

You should definitely tell the court that. They like to hear about court orders being trivialized and the rationale behind it. Then tell them about how you're not having no usupping on your status as dad, dang it. I think you're all set for court.

 

[Artemis_ofthe_Hunt]

You should definitely tell the court that. They like to hear about court orders being trivialized and the rationale behind it. Then tell them about how you're not having no usupping on your status as dad, dang it. I think you're all set for court.

This schmuck sounds like my ex... just reading this ridiculous drivel pi$$es me off!

 

[PQN]

Excuse me? I'm hear for legal advice.

If the support order is for 306 per month...medical insurance is what? 100 a month? I'm paying over 75 percent of the order.

In other words, 24 and some percent can be considered minute.

How about if your boss only paid you 75% of your salary? Would you consider that a minute issue???

I do not get why you are fighting this adoption. You haven't developed a relationship with the child, you do not meet your full child support obligation, and you clearly resent having to pay child support.

Your current situation:
1. You do not visit or contact child.
2. You pay $306/month.

Post-adoption situation
1. You do not visit or contact child.
2. You pay nothing/month.

How is this not a win/win for you?

 

[Artemis_ofthe_Hunt]

How about if your boss only paid you 75% of your salary? Would you consider that a minute issue???

I do not get why you are fighting this adoption. You haven't developed a relationship with the child, you do not meet your full child support obligation, and you clearly resent having to pay child support.

Your current situation:
1. You do not visit or contact child.
2. You pay $306/month.

Post-adoption situation
1. You do not visit or contact child.
2. You pay nothing/month.
How is this not a win/win for you?

not necessarily re the bolded. OP would more likely than not be responsible for the 24 "minute" percent of child support he hasn't paid. Plus interest.

 

[PQN]

not necessarily re the bolded. OP would more likely than not be responsible for the 24 "minute" percent of child support he hasn't paid. Plus interest.

True, unless mom was never on public aid and waives it just to get the whole thing done.

 

[Artemis_ofthe_Hunt]

True, unless mom was never on public aid and waives it just to get the whole thing done.

You're right, forgot that "minute" detail.

 

[CJane]

I'ma guess OP isn't paying this attorney a "minute amount" in order to hear exactly what he wants and pursue the litigation either. Or rather, I'll bet his PARENTS aren't paying a "minute" amount.

The legal reality is that in Indiana, it doesn't really matter if Dad has paid child support. Legally speaking, his permission is NOT NEEDED for a termination if Mom can prove that he's refused to have a relationship with the child. And obviously, she can. He's known exactly how to contact her and has chosen not to. He's known where she is because his parents have known where she is, and he's chosen not to contact her. He's had the standing all along and has chosen not to pursue visitation through the courts. If the GAL recommends for termination (and obviously she sees his testosterone driven posturing for what it is), then I highly doubt that OP will retain his rights, and this child will be blessed with a father who loves and provides for him.

He hasn't given a rat's hairy behind about this child until someone else decided to be a man and actually FATHER the child. And now he's feeling like his yard is being peed in.

 

[Sparco23]

bunch of know it alls in here i see

don't bother giving me any legal advice

thanks for nothing

 

[Proserpina]

I'ma guess OP isn't paying this attorney a "minute amount" in order to hear exactly what he wants and pursue the litigation either. Or rather, I'll bet his PARENTS aren't paying a "minute" amount.

The legal reality is that in Indiana, it doesn't really matter if Dad has paid child support. Legally speaking, his permission is NOT NEEDED for a termination if Mom can prove that he's refused to have a relationship with the child. And obviously, she can. He's known exactly how to contact her and has chosen not to. He's known where she is because his parents have known where she is, and he's chosen not to contact her. He's had the standing all along and has chosen not to pursue visitation through the courts. If the GAL recommends for termination (and obviously she sees his testosterone driven posturing for what it is), then I highly doubt that OP will retain his rights, and this child will be blessed with a father who loves and provides for him.

He hasn't given a rat's hairy behind about this child until someone else decided to be a man and actually FATHER the child. And now he's feeling like his yard is being peed in.

Co-sign please.

This is one instance when I really am rooting for step-dad.

 

[Proserpina]

I'm a selfish idiot who doesn't really give a toss about my kid.

I'll let it go because my kid deserves better.

Thanks for making me see the light.

There, I fixed that for ya!

 

[SESmama]

bunch of know it alls in here i see

don't bother giving me any legal advice

thanks for nothing

You were given advice.

1) In Indiana paying child support alone does not guarantee your right cannot be removed.
2) You have not seen/spoken with/checked on the child since 2008 (you saw him last in 2008 and attempted a phone call in 2005). That is 2-3 years with no contact. Yes, your father has seen the child but he is also a legal stranger to the child so you cannot use him.

Since you have not bothered to actually try and develop a relationship with the child (and forget about the whole money thing) you have basically, per the Indiana guidelines, abandoned the child. So, now a father the child has known wishes to truly care for the child. Mom may have a very good chance at getting the adoption to go through.

The attitude is only going to get you into trouble. With the courts and with mom. You are going to need to learn to communicate with the mom should the adoption be stopped. The step-dad is going to continue to be in the child's life and I doubt the child will suddenly abandon his/her relationship with said step-dad so yes, you are going to have to either deal with him as well if the adoption is stopped. You are, more than likely should the adoption be stopped, going to have to go through a re-intro period with the child. That is going to entail short, supervised visits with the child in the child's location for a while, then move to unsupervised in the child location. At some point, should the adoption be stopped, you MAY get some holiday and summer time. However, by the time that finally goes through the child will be, what, 8 or 9 years old?
In addition, mom can take you back to court and request the insurance cost be added to the CS order since you have failed to secure said insurance (and sorry but not getting the SS number from mom alone will not fly) so she, or step-dad, has had to provide said insurance. So, they should get a portion (if not all) of the insurance cost reimbursed to them. Then you are right, you won't have to worry about the minute little thing of medical insurance since you will be paying via CS order.
Driving 8 hours to a single (a 1 time thing) court hearing does NOT show you are ready to parent a child.

With all of that you have been given advice.

MPO is that step-dad SHOULD be allowed to adopt. Then, as PQN stated you may very well be off the hook for future CS payments and can go on with your life never having to worry over a child you gave up for money.